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Birthday Party Etiquette NWR

Hi everyone. Background: My partner is planning my 30th birthday party this summer. She is keeping it relatively small (around 25-30 people, close friends and family). My aunt is hosting the party at her house with a pool and nice backyard. My partner's plan is to get the party catered by a local catering company, with some appetizers and then stations for dinner. They also offered to throw in a bartender for a small fee. The whole catering package is pretty affordable for the quality of food and service we are getting. Not that it matters, but we budgeted for the caterer and can afford it. We are obviously going to be hosting the entire event, food and drinks, no one will have to pay for anything. We entertain pretty frequently at our home, and always have friends and family over for dinner or cookouts. We generally do all the prep work, serving and making all the food. We figured for this party, we would prefer not to have to cook or BBQ and would prefer to have it catered.

My question: After invitations went out, people have started making comments about how "over the top" it is to have a caterer for a birthday party. It's starting to give me a complex. Are we wrong to have it catered, and we should just make the food ourselves? This party is by no means 'fancy' or formal, it's just a backyard party that starts at 5 with swimming. My friends seem to be reacting like we're trying to plan another wedding and it's making me mad.

Thanks,
Jenni

Re: Birthday Party Etiquette NWR

  • I had my FI's 40th birthday party half catered. I made some of the food myself and ordered trays of food, sushi and other items from a catering company. His birthday party sounds a lot like what you're planning. We all hung out in the back yard. It was very casual. 

    Don't let these other opinions make you feel bad about what you're planning. I don't think it sounds over the top at all. 

    Also, when you're making all the food yourself, you don't get to spend time with your guest. This is exactly why I started getting events catered. I'd spend so much time cooking and cleaning that I never got to enjoy the party. Eff that noise. 
  • stef42188stef42188 member
    25 Love Its 10 Comments First Anniversary Name Dropper
    edited May 2014
    I don't think you should let these comments bother you. It sounds much less stressful to have it catered so that you don't have to cook beforehand, and to have a bartender to serve and keep track of everyone getting drinks. Also, you and your partner will get to spend more time with your guests instead of worrying about everything. I think you should have fun and enjoy your 30th!


    ETA: I must have been writing at the same time as @ClimbingBrideNY :)
  • I would come to this party. It sounds awesome. Your friends can hush it.
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  • phiraphira member
    5000 Comments 500 Love Its Second Anniversary 5 Answers
    My aunt and uncle have catering for almost every party they host nowadays. Wouldn't strike me as odd.

    Like @scribe95 I'm not sure how everyone knows it's a catered party.
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  • Ditto not know how people know it's a centered party. We're having my son's christening party in our yard on Sunday. It's half catered.
     
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  • In all honesty, good on ya.  Planning a party isn't easy in itself, and planning to feed everyone isn't easy either.  I can't cook to save my life so if I ever held a party like that I'd absolutely get it catered. 
  • Having it catered makes it easier for the hosts to enjoy themselves without running to the kitchen making more food and looking for things. These guests that are making these comments are rude - you're feeding them for free and they're criticizing you?!
  • If it were me, I would tell my friends that if they don't want to eat delicious catered food, then they're welcome to eat a fat dick instead. But I am a jerk like that.

    Seriously? People like to stir shit just to stir it. Brush it off, host your (lovely and fun-sounding) pool party, and ignore those busybodies.
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  • thanks for the replies everyone, makes me think i am not crazy...

    i mis-typed, not everyone knows it going to be catered. but a good handful of people invited do, because they are close friends and have been asking questions about the party. so i shared some details with them about what we were planning... guess i should just say "it'll be great, hope you can come!"
  • I think your party sounds fabulous. Those friends can shut it.
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  • Screw them.
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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