Family invites

agenevieve22016

So I had already decided that I wasn't inviting all my aunts and uncles my parents both have 8 brothers and sisters. Our budget was for 70 people now I can't get it below 90 (oh joy) then my mom chimes in and we get in an argument have you finished the guest list...which I had. She then tells me I want all my brothers and sisters invited. They are my siblings and they need an invite even though I know they won't come. Well let me give you a run down my aunts who are dear to me and I'm very close with absolutely can't stand two of the wife in laws. I honestly can't either. My mom says oh they won't come but they are very spiteful people and I think they would come. So here's my wedding and there's people I can't stomach at it. Long story short my mother says I Will pay for all my family who comes. Boom I'm screwed and what else can I say?? I want to scream so what if some of them don't come what if they do and cause a problem?? Then that leads me to having to invite the rest of my dads siblingings. I want to scream! Any suggestions??

msuprincess04

I'm kind of lost in that paragraph, but it sounds like your mom wants all of her siblings (and that includes their spouses) invited to the wedding, and she has offered to pay for any that go. You don't like them all and had no intetion of inviting them.

The easy answer is, "it's your wedding, invite who you want!" You don't have to accept your mom's offer to pay for extra guests. You don't have to invite a couple if you don't like one of them (you can't split up couples though). And, you don't have to invite anyone you don't want to. However, if you do invite them, you need to plan on them being there, at least budgetwise, and unless your mother gives you the money up front, you have to assume you will be paying for them.

If I were you, I'd say, "Mom, I appreciate the offer, but the guest list is already set, and Aunt and Uncle A, B, and C aren't invited." And leave it at that.

KatWAG

agenevieve22016 said:

So I had already decided that I wasn't inviting all my aunts and uncles my parents both have 8 brothers and sisters. Our budget was for 70 people now I can't get it below 90 (oh joy) then my mom chimes in and we get in an argument have you finished the guest list...which I had. She then tells me I want all my brothers and sisters invited. They are my siblings and they need an invite even though I know they won't come. Well let me give you a run down my aunts who are dear to me and I'm very close with absolutely can't stand two of the wife in laws. I honestly can't either. My mom says oh they won't come but they are very spiteful people and I think they would come. So here's my wedding and there's people I can't stomach at it. Long story short my mother says I Will pay for all my family who comes. Boom I'm screwed and what else can I say?? I want to scream so what if some of them don't come what if they do and cause a problem?? Then that leads me to having to invite the rest of my dads siblingings. I want to scream! Any suggestions??

I cant even read this. Your writing is so unclear.

But from what I can gather, you need to stand up to you mom and say no.

AddieCake

So you have family members who would show up out of spite? That's a weird way to look at that. "Let's go to the wedding we were invited to!  That will show THEM!" How is that being spiteful? 

 If you are paying, then only invite the people you want to invite. Tell your mother you don't care for those people and don't wish to invite them. 

southernbelle0915

agenevieve22016 said:

So I had already decided that I wasn't inviting all my aunts and uncles my parents both have 8 brothers and sisters. Our budget was for 70 people now I can't get it below 90 (oh joy) then my mom chimes in and we get in an argument have you finished the guest list...which I had. She then tells me I want all my brothers and sisters invited. They are my siblings and they need an invite even though I know they won't come. Well let me give you a run down my aunts who are dear to me and I'm very close with absolutely can't stand two of the wife in laws. I honestly can't either. My mom says oh they won't come but they are very spiteful people and I think they would come. So here's my wedding and there's people I can't stomach at it. Long story short my mother says I Will pay for all my family who comes. Boom I'm screwed and what else can I say?? I want to scream so what if some of them don't come what if they do and cause a problem?? Then that leads me to having to invite the rest of my dads siblingings. I want to scream! Any suggestions??

"Thanks for offering to pay for them, but the guest list is closed. We are not inviting anyone else."

theartistformerlyknownas

Quotation marks and sentence structure are your friends.