Total Disappointment

VarunaTT

I really truly feel like you need this:  https://youtu.be/RKPOeYZR_xo

You have got to start standing up for yourself.  

flantastic

Thanks for the quotes and the TL;DR. I thought about trying this morning and then... did not.

OP, your wedding is over. You are married. This is great. Sounds like you need to stop thinking about this trivial shit and enjoy being married.

MesmrEwe

NOLABridesmaid said:

Ano, I get it. Some things were really stressful leading up to your wedding and some things didn't go as planned. Take the rest of today and be pissed about it, and wake up tomorrow with a new outlook about it.

You're married and hopefully happy about it. Start putting all of the energy you have been giving the above and give to starting off your new life with your husband. K

This - but also, because this comes up a lot on TN, OP, should you ever choose to welcome children into your life, you need to resolve the unhealthy relationships in being able to distance yourself from that energy and assert what you want.  What happens when they all want to be in Labor & Delivery with you and rule the show even though you're technically the one in charge.  Or parenting decisions, or what have you.  There really is a life-pattern that it really is o.k. to stand up for yourself and say "NO, that is NOT what I want!".  Also, never use ANY of the vendors you used again if they weren't willing to resolve the issues (talk to the baker obviously because if you ordered no fondant and the fountain wasn't working you may have grounds for something, even if it's just an anniversary cake, it's still something.  - heck - our baker even messed up the flavor of the cake, not just the look, and I got squat for it but really wasn't going to press either on it because I used to be that much of a people pleaser)

I feel your frustration, the only thing that went off as it was planned on our wedding day was DH & I got married.   No one tells you ahead of time to plan that your wedding really isn't about you even though you're the guests of honor.  Yes, you needed to assert yourself more and not been afraid to walk way.  Plan that for your 10th Anniversary you're going to go on a vacation alone with YH, get the (party/formal) dress of your dreams to wear, and go to dinner alone together (but don't get too PO'd with him when he has other plans and you don't get to wear the dress you just forked over $$$ on and never actually get to wear it - hindsight 20/20)...  But, accept the moment for what it was, resolve that if you ever become a MOB/MOG that you'll NEVER do that to your child, and that you'll stand up for the bride and her feelings if you're ever involved in someone else's wedding.  The past is there for a reason, the future is up to you to make the changes that need to be made so you never feel this way again, because for better or worse, this was a life pattern being made as clear as possible.  Chin up!  Feel the feelings, and then resolve to change things for the future!