In today's edition of "Am I A Bad Person?"

PMeg819

My cousin got married last summer and I attended the wedding. This is the first time and only time I've met her husband.

She sent a message today on Facebook to my extended family (cousins, aunts, etc.) asking if we would write a letter to her husband as he's leaving in December for a 4 month training and will mostly likely be deployed after that. She wants to make a book of letters from family and friends for him to have while he is gone.

I appreciate the sentiment and I think it's a good idea. But I know nothing about this guy. I've spoken to him for a grand total of 15 minutes. I'm thinking I'm going to let DS draw a picture or something and then I'll write something short like "Thank You for your service!" But I don't want to.

MesmrEwe

Post this to the Military boards - they might have some extra ideas for you that are fitting.  IMO - sounds great what you have planned given your relationship (or lack there of)...

Heffalump

That's more than I would do, most likely.  I'm voting "not a bad person."

mrsconn23

Nope, not a bad person.  

BIL is being deployed to Kuwait and this hasn't crossed my mind at all to do this stuff.  Other BIL has been deployed (to Korea) and we didn't send him anything when he was away.  

If my sister asked to help with a care package for BIL, I would. But I bet she'll just send that stuff on her own without it being a group effort. 

NOLABridesmaid

I think you can send a general message. Stay safe and healthy, wish you the best with your training, yada yada. The drawing is a cute touch too. It's a small gesture and I'm sure they would appreciate it.

6fsn

Since she asked, do the picture and note.  It's one of those things that takes little effort and might make someone smile.

Heffalump

6fsn said:

Since she asked, do the picture and note.  It's one of those things that takes little effort and might make someone smile.

IDK, it looks like more of a broadcast message, in which case I wouldn't even feel like she was asking me specifically, just the group as a whole.  And if it was someone I met for 15 minutes one time, I don't know that I would expect them to be all that touched by my kids' drawings or whatever, considering they'd basically be random strangers to the recipient.

But I'm pretty non-military (no friends/family serving), so I'm the first to admit that I don't have actual experience here, just speculation.

kmmssg

NOLABridesmaid said:

I think you can send a general message. Stay safe and healthy, wish you the best with your training, yada yada. The drawing is a cute touch too. It's a small gesture and I'm sure they would appreciate it.

I am with NOLA but I am biased here. The support gained from something like that is phenomenal and takes very little. The drawings are awesome. Even a generic note of "wishing you success in your training and a safe and quick deployment" does wonders.

randomslove

As a veteran, I personally wouldn't care if a family member I barely know chose not to write me while in training/deployed. I actually just went through all of my letters I got while in-- ones from close family and a few close friends stayed, while I threw out the rest. If the SO of a cousin had written me a letter, I'd probably have to think a minute about who that person was. So... if you really don't want to do it because you don't know him, don't do it. And don't feel bad for not doing it. It's okay.