Dear Jane,
I’ve been living with a male friend for two and a half years now, and it’s mostly great. We’ve become the best of friends, go out regularly together, make each other laugh and understand each other. I’m happy to have him around.
The problem is that he is a pathological liar. As soon as he launches into one of his stories, I brace myself for a tidal wave of bullshit. The stories have 3 themes. 1) Heroic acts of bravery in which he stood up to bullies 2) Evil crimes committed against him by ex-girlfriends. 3) Claims that he was once a successful stand-up comedian and is best friends with every comedian on the planet.
When the lies start, my brain switches off. Lies are about as interesting as people’s dreams. By pretending to believe him, I am being disingenuous myself and missing out on real human connection. I’ve only called him out on his lies once, and it made him angry. I know that he lies to protect himself from some deep psychological wound he has (the lies are never malicious) but I’m tired of them. I get very embarrassed when he does it in the company of others.
Should I try to confront him or just carry on pretending to believe him?
Thanks in advance.