Wedding Woes

LW, you're a judgmental dick.

Dear Prudence,

I wouldn’t have been able to go to my half sister’s wedding due to a work conflict. I wanted to show my support, so I bought her an expensive Hawaiian honeymoon package. Only a month before the wedding, the lovebirds broke up due to rampant cheating on both sides. This has caused our father a lot of embarrassment and cost a pretty penny. I managed to transfer the vacation package back to myself and made plans to go with a friend. It is nonrefundable, and my boss would be happier I don’t take off Christmas.

Only now my half sister is freaking out she can’t go to Hawaii. She deserves it after “all the stress” she has been under. I reminded her that you can’t take a honeymoon if you aren’t married. My stepmother called this “insensitive.” I made the mistake of saying I would have been happy to take my half sister with me if she’d been the only one who got cheated on, but she needed time to reflect and maybe see a therapist more than she needed a suntan. My stepmother is now twice as angry at me. I know I am the easier target, but for crying out loud, my half sister was sleeping with two other men during her engagement, including her fiancé’s brother! What should I do here?

—Who Gets the Honeymoon?

Re: LW, you're a judgmental dick.

  • downtondivadowntondiva member
    Fifth Anniversary 1000 Comments 500 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited October 2019
    If the wedding is called off, the gifts have to be returned. It's as simple as that. Anything about who was cheating on who during the engagement is beside the point.
  • I agree with PP - LW is right to take the trip back, but shouldn't have been so rude.  Just say that since the wedding was cancelled you are no longer buying a gift for it.  
    Though, I'm a little judgey of this sister for assuming that she still got to go on the vacation and getting mad at LW.  Due to LW's attitude it might seem justified, but still, she shouldn't expect it.

  • LW was 100% right to take back the honeymoon - that was a gift for the married couple and they didn't get married. She was 100% NOT within her rights to judge her half-sister and make the comments she did.
    Pretty much this.   LW needs to apologize for the comments made but doesn't need to feel bad about taking the gift back or taking it herself.  Sorrynotsorry - the gift doesn't get given when the event doesn't occur. 
  • Sister doesn't sound like she's someone who makes astoundingly good decisions generally and maybe deserves a call-out (who knows what other behavior is in addition to this), but LW was wrong to verbalize that as reason to not go on the trip.  It sounds like LW never wanted to take sister on the trip and made up a gross answer about why, causing more family friction.  LW should go ahead and apologize for saying something cruel and then try to just move past it.
  • Keep the vacation and have fun. 

    But also keep your opinions about your sisters behavior to yourself. 
  • Open mouth - insert foot - chew rapidly LW!

    Yea - keep the snide comments to yourself next time!  And, you are not required to take SS with you!
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