Dear Prudence,
My mother-in-law is generous and dotes on our 3-year-old son. We live less than an hour away and visit every Sunday. She invites us to spend the night on holidays, but never in the spare room. Instead we sleep on an air mattress downstairs. They let other guests (and our son) stay in the spare room. My mother-in-law has accused me of snooping a few times. I never have. I think she doesn’t want me upstairs. My husband defended me from those accusations, and my father-in-law apologized to me on her behalf. She has a hot temper, but she eventually apologized too. But she still makes sure I never go upstairs. If I need something for my son that’s in his room, she’ll go out of her way to get it for me. I feel resentful at the thought of another New Year’s on an air mattress on the floor in the living room. My husband doesn’t think it’s a big deal, but he doesn’t have a good reason for why she does it either.
—Not Welcome Upstairs