Wedding Woes

Yep, gross. But it's probably a coping mechanism.

Dear Prudence,

My long-term boyfriend is wonderful in all ways, except one—he is constantly popping his facial acne. It’s an unpleasant habit that I’ve told him repeatedly really grosses me out, not to mention the significant scarring it creates. The pandemic made me hopeful the admonitions not to touch his face would help him clean up his act. To the contrary, he now spends more time than ever obsessively popping zits as soon as they arise. He emerges from the bathroom with blood on his face at least three times per week, all of which I’m privy to now that we’re both working from home. I find this so gross, but he’s proven unwilling to change his behavior. What should we do?

—Zapping Those Zits

Re: Yep, gross. But it's probably a coping mechanism.

  • It's gross.

    But "What should WE do?"  For fucks sake it's his face. 

    If you're grossed out by seeing it then don't look.   If he tries to make moves on you when he's popped a zit don't nag him but do say, "Hey, you are more than welcome to keep popping zits on your face as it's your face.   However when you do it I need to tell you that it's a turn off for me.  " 

    If he doesn't change it's his right.   It's your right to tell him how you feel about it and know that it's not in your control. 
  • This definitely sounds like a minor annoyance that stress and close quarters are blowing out of proportion. 


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  • It's gross, but he's doing it in the bathroom, not showing her while she's trying to work. 

    I guess you could order some supplies and do some at-home facials to try to clear pores before zits pop up, but really I'd just say this part of living with another person. Sometimes people are gross. 
  • It’s gross but you have to decide if you can live with it. 

    I like @banana468’s suggestion to tell him it’s a turn off. It certainly would be for me! 
  • Definitely gross and it doesn't sound like other that saying "yeh that's gross" LW has said much.
    Has LW said "hey you're causing your skin to be worse" or even before this "hey have you thought about seeing a derm about the acne?"

    But like title said, the fact it's worse now is definitely coping.
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