Wedding Woes

Only you can decide if the risk is worth it.

Dear Prudence,

I’ve always been interested in doing some form of sex work. I think I’d be good at it and would enjoy it. I’ve thought about doing some sugar babying in the past but never gone through with it. Recently, I’ve been wanting to start an OnlyFans account. The only issue is I teach college. I’m very worried about what would happen if a student stumbled across my account. Is this a terrible idea?

—Only Certain Fans

Re: Only you can decide if the risk is worth it.

  • I think you need to fully investigate the risks.  Consider reading up on those who HAVE taught college and did this as well.   Books have been written and those were NOT in the age of social media.   Know that if you do this and it's not legal you are your own HR director and enforcer.  Consider that risk.  
  • Or maybe you’ll make enough that if you do get caught/fired, you realize You have this to fall back on?

  • Teachers can and do get fired for stuff like this. 
    They become scandalous national news stories for stuff like this. 
  • Unless the college is religious based they probably won’t get in trouble. I’d wait until you have tenure just to be sure. I’d check your contract and handbook though for any morality/ personal conduct policies. 

    But if you’re really interested in exploring this line of work, do your research on protecting yourself (physically & emotionally) and go for it. 
  • Sorry LW, this is an either or situation. You can’t do both and expect everything to turn out okay. And college students? They’re BOUND to find your account, no matter how anonymous you try to make it. 


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  • Teachers can and do get fired for stuff like this. 
    At the college level this is a lot less likely as long as the faculty member is involved with their own students. 
  • Teachers can and do get fired for stuff like this. 
    Another good point.   There's a potential code of conduct that teachers are held to outside of any place in the US where this may be legal.   


  • STARMOON44STARMOON44 member
    First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited October 2020
    Teachers can and do get fired for stuff like this. 
    At the college level this is a lot less likely as long as the faculty member is involved with their own students. 
    Def less certain than elementary school but any non-tenured faculty member should be really worried about the consequences of this. 
  • Teachers can and do get fired for stuff like this. 
    At the college level this is a lot less likely as long as the faculty member is involved with their own students. 
    Def less certain than elementary school but any non-tenured faculty member should be really worried about the consequences of this. 
    Yup.   And in the age of social media I can't imagine that they'd want to deal with it.   And I think the LW is sorely mistaken if she's teaching college and believes that she can do anything on the internet in private. 
  • The LW should assume that the college and her students WILL find out and make their decision accordingly.  Because, at some point, they probably will.

    It's interesting to hear @charlotte989875's POV that, at a college level, it may not necessarily lead to being fired.

    But would she find it embarrassing if it becomes a topic of conversation amongst coworkers and students?  Or is it NBD to her and she'd just brush off and ignore the gossip.

    Another option might be to go more the traditional "sugar baby" route, where it's done in-person with one or a select few "generous boyfriends".  Depending on how she advertises, that's much less likely to be discovered and if she finds her sugar daddy(s) quickly, the ad won't be up long.  
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • The LW should assume that the college and her students WILL find out and make their decision accordingly.  Because, at some point, they probably will.

    It's interesting to hear @charlotte989875's POV that, at a college level, it may not necessarily lead to being fired.

    But would she find it embarrassing if it becomes a topic of conversation amongst coworkers and students?  Or is it NBD to her and she'd just brush off and ignore the gossip.

    Another option might be to go more the traditional "sugar baby" route, where it's done in-person with one or a select few "generous boyfriends".  Depending on how she advertises, that's much less likely to be discovered and if she finds her sugar daddy(s) quickly, the ad won't be up long.  
    Maybe because I knew faculty who slept with students where the university knew and didn’t care? Especially the sugar baby situation if she’s not doing it with students (which likely wouldn’t be the case in a sugar baby situation) and/or she’s fairly discreet (ie using a private company/server, not using her real name, not advertising on personal websites) I think the likelihood someone finds out, goes through the process to tell the administration, & it goes through the formal process for her to be fired is pretty unlikely. Universities are pretty terrible at dealing with non-consensual situations, they’re not going to be moving rapidly on an adult engaging in consensual behavior. 

    Now the OnlyFans thing would definitely be more risky IMO. More likely that a student could find her on there and share it with others.  Depending on the university she could get in trouble for it, but some of the more liberal schools? Probably nothing is going to happen. 

    Religious based schools, schools in the Bible-belt, sure there are going to be a lot more consequences but I think like S+S said the biggest risk is going to be people talking about her outside life. 
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