Again...therapy. With someone who specializes in trauma.

mrsconn23

Dear Prudence,

My brother tormented me growing up and was a sexually threatening presence in my life. I have a lot of trauma surrounding those years and experiences. His name is a relatively common unisex name (think “Charlie”), and I encounter it often, as my job requires a lot of one-off interactions with college students. Every time I see or hear it, I’m left with racing thoughts and a physical anxiety response. It derails my whole day. I’ve been in therapy before to address this issue, but my therapist was unhelpful, and I eventually quit. I’m on waiting lists for a few different therapists now, but don’t anticipate being able to start back any time soon. How do I cope in the meantime?

—Unavoidable Trigger

charlotte989875

Try one of the online therapy services until you can get in with the ones you’re waiting for. They might not be perfect but they can hopefully help out work through some coping skills. 

This is a trauma response but one that is interfering with your life. 

banana468

You'll need a new therapist.  If hearing the name of a person is creating this anxiety then I think you need to look through your insurance for options and you may need to contact your primary care (if you have one) physician for recs and possibly an anxiety drug. 

downtondiva

banana468 said:

You'll need a new therapist.  If hearing the name of a person is creating this anxiety then I think you need to look through your insurance for options and you may need to contact your primary care (if you have one) physician for recs and possibly an anxiety drug. 

Totally agree, and keep in mind that there are different types of therapy (talk therapy, CBT, etc.) and some may be more helpful than others. Do some research and before you start paying another therapist, determine whether the kind of work they do/their specialties would suit you. No judgment for your reaction to hearing that name - it's amazing what can bring back traumatic experiences for any of us - but it's critical to get this under control so it doesn't interfere with your job or your life.