When I got engaged recently, we asked a mutual friend of many years to be our officiant. We were really excited … until she told us that she was in a relationship with a married man. She’s convinced that he’s “the one” and plans to continue this relationship while he divorces his wife. She even asked if he could be her date to the wedding. I’ve told her this makes me uncomfortable, since he’s still married and we’ve had to scale back our guest list because of COVID. She has continued to ask about it and sees any disapproval of her relationship as a personal attack on her happiness. I haven’t told her that my fiancé and I are both becoming increasingly uncomfortable with the idea of her officiating our wedding, since she clearly doesn’t respect her boyfriend’s marriage and I’m not sure she will respect ours enough to perform the ceremony how we want it. How do I approach this with her and let her know that we want to find a new officiant? Am I being unreasonable? Should we still have her officiate our wedding?
—Officiant Sleeping With Married Men