Wedding Woes

It sounds like you came on to someone and acted poorly when the feelings weren't returned.

mrsconn23mrsconn23 member
Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
edited December 2021 in Wedding Woes

Dear Prudence,

Six-ish months ago, over the summer, I had my best friend come to visit me. The trip was fine, with some expected awkwardness from the fact that we had never met in person despite being friends for five years. Afterwards, my friend confessed that they thought I had feelings for them. I admitted I did but that I tend to develop feelings for people I’m very close to and had no plans to act on them. After that, my friend significantly reduced contact.

Without getting too much into the weeds, I reacted poorly to that. We went from talking literally multiple times a day to me going days and longer without hearing from them. I absolutely overreacted, none of which was helped by my mental state at the time. Eventually they cut contact with me, and a third friend (who I had been friends with way longer and met a few times) also cut me off because they sided with my best friend.

About a month after this all happened, it was that friend’s birthday. I attempted to reach out on a messaging platform only to find myself blocked. I reached out twice to that other friend. Since then, my mental health has significantly improved, and things in my life are going a lot better.

I want to reach out to them both, via text (I still have their numbers) and apologize. Part of me hopes we can be friends again, but I’m not expecting anything from them. I also want to try and explain about how much better I’m doing. Is this a correct thing to do? Or is this still crossing major lines and I should just let it be? For the record, all my contact information is the same and they could reach me whenever. I miss my friends!

— Is My Mistake Really Unforgivable?

Re: It sounds like you came on to someone and acted poorly when the feelings weren't returned.

  • Define "I reacted poorly to that." 

    I think LW doesn't want to get too much into the weeds because the weeds are where LW's culpability lies.  Did you sprinkle salt on them to kill the plant?  Because the lack of words used tells me there's salt on a plant and that killed it. 
  • Block means no. Do not contact them and move on with your life. 
  • So much of this story is weird and doesn't make logical sense.  That they talked multiple times a day for 5 years.  Met in person.  And then only afterwards was any mention of romantic feelings confessed.  Right //s.

    It's hard to advise someone when they are scant on details and the details they do provide sound like bullshit.

    I'm pretty sure it's not them, LW.  It's YOU.  They have made it exceedingly clear they do not want to be friends with you anymore and I bet it is for good reasons.  Let this go!  Do not harass them further.  They do not want to hear from you.  Maybe someday they will want to rekindle this friendship, but the ball is in their court now and it's their decision.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
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