I am feeling extreme remorse about how I treated a once-close friend. I was envious of her appearance and relationship, and when she made a mistake in her personal life, I turned on her and used it to make her look bad for years. Remarkably, and as a testament to her character, we have reconciled and I am trying to do what I can to make things right—as much as I can after obliterating someone’s trust and reputation. I am just so ashamed that I performed the classic woman-against-woman viciousness that I thought I was above as a progressive and smart woman. What do I do with this knowledge that I fell victim to one of patriarchy’s greatest ploys and hurt someone in the process?
—Consequences of My Own Actions