Dear Prudence,
My boyfriend and I are in a long-distance relationship and we are completely in love with each other. We both have experienced some pretty terrible relationships in the past with other people, but now we are in a loving, positive place. He has expressed that he had his first time under the influence when he was 21 years old. He said he regretted it and feels that relationships should not be based on the physical aspect. To some extent, I agree that relationships shouldn’t be based on sex.
We live a distance away from each other and we spend hours on video calls every night. Recently, I have been craving more attention from him but I have noticed that any slight remark or “flirt” that I make has made him feel uncomfortable, and he always says, “No, don’t say that…” or brushes me off. Don’t get me wrong, he treats me well, supports me, and he gives me the most beautiful compliments. I love him but I truly wish that he would express some interest in me. I would talk to him about it, but how do I say, “Please show some sexual interest in me because I am dying of need?” without coming across as weird, desperate, and pathetic?
—Desperate for Sexual Attention