Wedding Woes

Eww no. Stop being polite.

Dear Prudence,

I am happily married to my husband of 16 years. I have known my in-laws since high school and they are lovely, kind people. In the past five to six years, my father-in-law has started adding a kiss hello to the usual hug greeting when we see them. I wouldn’t be writing to you if it was a side kiss, but this is a lip kiss hello. As someone who is not very touchy or affectionate outside of my husband, it makes me extremely uncomfortable.

The vibe from my father-in-law is not creepy, but more so picking up an old-timey greeting habit. I have spoken to the other daughters-in-law about their experience and we all agree that we don’t like it, but opt to dodge as best we can so the kiss comes on the cheek, or inform him of potential sickness. But how many colds can I get?! Do we have someone (most likely a husband, one of his sons) say something to him about our discomfort with lip kiss greetings, or just keep doing our dodge and hope for the best method? None of the sons or daughters-in-law would enjoy this potentially awkward conversation.

—Why on the Lips

Re: Eww no. Stop being polite.

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    banana468banana468 member
    First Answer First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment
    "Oh Edgar my lips are for your son!" 
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    They definitely need to get one of their husbands to say something to the dad.  He sounds like a good person who would want to know that he is making his DILs uncomfortable, so he can stop doing it.  It will be a little awkward, but ultimately the best for everyone.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
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    levioosalevioosa member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    I'm part Italian, have a lot of Italian family, and I can tell you they keep the lip kisses off the table unless it's with an established cultural relationship where it's the norm. I used to haaaate it when my grandmother would grab my face and do the three kisses. But she was the only one and uh...boundaries were not even in her orbit. 

    It's so weird this just started five or six years ago? The hell? So for ten years no lip kisses and then BAM smackaroo? 

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    Ew. I would have thought Covid would have brought an end to this. But yah it’s time for a head turn and a “these lips are for your son only”. 
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