Stationed Overseas

Amy+Chris

My fiance and I started dating in 2006, and in 2008 he enlisted in the Air Force. I still had 2 years of school left, so we decided to try and make the long-distance thing work when he was stationed in ENGLAND! He proposed on my trip to see him in Europe (in front of the Eifel Tower at sunset, he kinda rocks like that!) last summer, and since then I have seen him for a total of 3 1/2 weeks. I can honestly say that I am SICK and TIRED of the long distance thing! lol, I am glad we have been able to stay together; we are both committed to each other and know that our relationship is stable, but we both agree that 2 years long-distance is A LOT and we can't wait to be married in February so we can be together for the majority of the time rather than apart. I just wanted to vent a bit and figured this may be the place to do so.

catemeg

Two years of long distance is definitely rough, and kudos to you both for sticking it through.  It's very admirable that you've finished school.  I'm sure it will be worth waiting for!

Long distance relationships are TOUGH... and it's really sweet when you get to finally be together!  I will caution you that there is a readjustment period when you finally are in the same place.  I think it's because you tend to idealize the relationship when you're apart, missing him and remembering all the great things about him and your relationship.  When you finally are in the same place, it's sometimes a bit of a let-down because no one's perfect.

When my BF and I finally moved in together, we were bickering over stupid things rather frequently.  It was incredibly frustrating, especially as we waited so long and both put up with a lot of sacrifices making a LDR work.

Just remind yourself when you get in this situation that you heard it from someone who's been through it - remind yourself that it's only a phase, that you're both only human (and you love him that way), and that all the great things are still true.

This is just something I wish someone had told me before I moved halfway across the country and into a home with him - we're wonderful now, and I've NEVER been happier, but there were about 2 months of adjusting.  If you know it going into it, you'll probably be able to avoid most of the stress or at least realize what's causing it so it doesn't upset you.

Amy+Chris

Thanks! That is very helpful to know. It is great when we get to be together, but I (and I'm pretty sure he thinks this way too) am very apprehensive about when we finally do live together. There is definitely going to be a huge adjustment period, but I know we can do it! Thanks for your input, I really appreciate it :-)

catemeg

I'm sure it will be wonderful!  The first week or so is absolute bliss.  Just wanted to let you know that it's normal to bicker a little more than normal during the adjustment, and that it passes, so that way it doesn't worry you when/if it happens!

Communication is key - and LDR definitely help prepare you for communication!!!

Luke&Sam625

That is such great advice Catemeg!! I had totally not even thought about the re-adjustment process!! LDR are so bittersweet. I know my FI is stationed in Japan, I'm in WA & it gets harder and harder everytime he leaves. He was supposed to come home at some point this summer but his SSgt just told him that he can't take leave twice in 6 months, His name is first on the list to come home in December (He better be here for the wedding!!), so the next time I get to see him might very well be our wedding day. Thank goodness for Skype!! Space A flights to Japan may very well be in my near future!!

SarahBim2111

I understand your feeling conpletely.  My FI and I were dating for a month before he left for basic for the Air Force.  It is definately hard being separated all this time... but girl, think of it this way... how many people can say that they have had multiple first kisses?!  Everytime we see each other, it is all brand new again!  Being with someone in the military really gives you an appreciation for the other person, and personally, I think you have a stronger relationship because of all of the trials you go through.  My FI and I were supposed to get married Juky 3 of this year (after being engaged since Feb 2009), we got about a 5 week notice that he was deploying in May.  So we have had to delay our wedding.  Luckily Air Force deployments are short and we are hoping for Sept 25th.  Keep your head up, Honey!  Take each day as it comes.  At the end of the night, you can check off one more day and before you know it, it will be February!