Wedding Vows & Ceremony Discussions
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Alternative to the unity candle

Since both sets of our parents are divorced (and remarried), a unity candle is definitely out of the question.  The parents might agree to it, but it would be an empty gesture..which I definitely don' t want.  So...anyone else deal with this?  I would like some kind acknowledgement of our families coming together...

5 pm wedding in a church

Re: Alternative to the unity candle

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    Plant a tree!
    Seriously, my friends just did this and it was gorgeous, symbolic and something they'll have forever.  Plus it really added to the ceremony decor!
    You could have you, your groom, and parents (if you wanted) water it during the ceremony and then plant it at your house!

    Good Luck finding something!
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    Why is a unity candle out of the question because your parents are divorced?  My parents are divorced, and my sister still did a unity candle at her wedding.  If you want it that bad, just have the bio moms light it, have someone else in your families light it, or light it yourselves.  But it's not a required part of the ceremony.
    This is a neglected planning bio.
    This is a belated married bio, with no reviews yet because I'm lazy.

    image
    Sometimes I feel like people think that brides are delicate little flower princesses who get all dressed up and pretty for one special moment of their dreams, when really they're just normal people who just happen to be getting married. Things shouldn't have to be sugar-coated for grown-ass women. -mstar284
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    there's always the cup idea or sand
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    The unity candle is to signify the families coming together.  I don't see why your parents being divorced would mean you can't do that unity ceremony but you can do others.  If you like the unity candle, just do it.  It isn't signifying anything about their marriages, it's about the families uniting.

    We did a sand ceremony, pics in married bio.
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    I don't understand what your parents being divorced has to do with anything.

    An alternative would be to not have a unity candle, which is what I did.
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    We are getting married in a chapel in Vegas. Neither sets of parents will be there and we are still having a unity candle. Two single candles will already be lit, which FI & I will use to light the unity candle. Parents don't have to light the candles.

    You can also check the sand, wine and several versions of rose ceremony.
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    It's not very romantic, but you could sign your marriage license in the ceremony. It's really pretty cool to watch the bride and groom sign the license followed by the witnesses and officiant... and unlike signing the license after the ceremony, your guests all get to be witness to the legal and spiritual joining of your lives.
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    Since a wedding ceremony IS a "unity thing", I'd say that getting married pretty much covers it.  You don't have to have anything.  Your guests won't miss it, and you'll be just as married without lighting candles, pouring sand, mixing wine, planting trees, combining dirt, or joining paint colors as you will by doing any of those things.
    "Trix, it's what they/our parents wanted. Why so judgemental? And why is your wedding date over a year and a half ago? And why do you not have a groom's name? And why have you posted over 12,000 posts? And why do you always say mean things to brides?" palegirl146
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