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Would you rather be a mermaid or a whale?

A girlfriend from high school just sent me this...and I think it's pretty darn cute/funny.
No offense to anyone- no matter what weight...skinny or not so skinny. I love you all very much- no matter of your size!!

And here we go:

A while back, at the entrance of a gym, there was a picture of a very thin and beautiful woman. The caption was "This summer, do you want to be a mermaid or a whale?"

The story goes, a woman (of clothing size unknown) answered the following way:

"Dear people, whales are always surrounded by friends (dolphins, seals, curious humans), they are sexually active and raise their children with great tenderness.
They entertain like crazy with dolphins and eat lots of prawns. They swim all day and travel to fantastic places like Patagonia, the Barents Sea or the coral reefs of Polynesia.
They sing incredibly well and sometimes even are on cds. They are impressive and dearly loved animals, which everyone defend and admires.

Mermaids do not exist.

But if they existed, they would line up to see a psychologist because of a problem of split personality: woman or fish?
They would have no sex life and could not bear children.
Yes, they would be lovely, but lonely and sad.
And, who wants a girl that smells like fish by his side?

Without a doubt, I'd rather be a whale.

At a time when the media tells us that only thin is beautiful, I prefer to eat ice cream with my kids, to have dinner with my husband, to eat and drink and have fun with my friends.

We women, we gain weight because we accumulate so much wisdom and knowledge that there isn't enough space in our heads, and it spreads all over our bodies.
We are not fat, we are greatly cultivated.
Every time I see my curves in the mirror, I tell myself: "How amazing am I ?! "

And she also sent me this picture:


This is french model Tara Lynn.


And this is Lizzie Miller:


And try this on for size:


Hm...

Maybe I should start looking in the mirror every morning and say,
"How AMAZING am I?!"
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Re: Would you rather be a mermaid or a whale?

  • SopChickSopChick member
    1000 Comments Third Anniversary
    edited December 2011
    This has been all over my fb news feed today, and I love it. That last picture you posted really shows how much pressure we (as women) put on ourselves IMO.
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  • lunarsongbirdlunarsongbird member
    2500 Comments Second Anniversary Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_would-rather-mermaid-whale?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:00a088ba-de4d-47ca-bf2d-35a59266c5c7Post:a1c00a7e-263c-493a-b569-f508097b64d2">Re: Would you rather be a mermaid or a whale?</a>:
    [QUOTE]This has been all over my fb news feed today, and I love it. That last picture you posted really shows how much pressure we (as women) put on ourselves IMO.
    Posted by SopChick[/QUOTE]

    Isn't it crazy how fast things can spread through facebook?
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  • SopChickSopChick member
    1000 Comments Third Anniversary
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_would-rather-mermaid-whale?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:00a088ba-de4d-47ca-bf2d-35a59266c5c7Post:34d8b569-3dd5-401b-8da1-5f02b2f6ecb3">Re: Would you rather be a mermaid or a whale?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Would you rather be a mermaid or a whale? : Isn't it crazy how fast things can spread through facebook?
    Posted by lunarsongbird[/QUOTE]
    Seriously!

    How are you Lunar? I feel like I never get to chat with you anymore! How is your new job? and how's life?
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  • edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_would-rather-mermaid-whale?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:00a088ba-de4d-47ca-bf2d-35a59266c5c7Post:a1c00a7e-263c-493a-b569-f508097b64d2">Re: Would you rather be a mermaid or a whale?</a>:
    [QUOTE]This has been all over my fb news feed today, and I love it. <strong>That last picture you posted really shows how much pressure we (as women) put on ourselves </strong>IMO.
    Posted by SopChick[/QUOTE]

    Amen, Sop... that is soo true.. I'm huge, I'll admit, 250lbs. but my BF says he'd dump me if I was anorexic because he like curves. Now yes, I'll admit, this is not my ideal weight, but as long as I try to be healthy, and exercise, that should be all that matters, right?
  • SopChickSopChick member
    1000 Comments Third Anniversary
    edited December 2011
    I'm nowhere near tiny either, and while I know I should (and need) to lose about 100lbs for health reasons, I don't think it's worth making myself upset over. That being said, I'm having a rough time remembering not to beat myself up lately. I'm one of the biggest girls in my program, and because I'm working towards a career in performance, size unfortunately is a factor. I've been pretty bummed lately, and last night BF said he likes me curvy, and that while he knows I want to be smaller, he doesn't want me to lose all the curviness and be bony. :p
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  • tafft1tafft1 member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_would-rather-mermaid-whale?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:00a088ba-de4d-47ca-bf2d-35a59266c5c7Post:0da75877-14de-4b47-a700-6d7951abc0cb">Re: Would you rather be a mermaid or a whale?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Would you rather be a mermaid or a whale? : Amen, Sop... that is soo true.. I'm huge, I'll admit, 250lbs. but my BF says he'd dump me if I was anorexic because he like curves. Now yes, I'll admit, this is not my ideal weight, but <strong>as long as I try to be healthy, and exercise, that should be all that matters, right?</strong>
    Posted by CLR+VCR[/QUOTE]

    Yes i completely agree ! i will always have curves and never be "thin" and i'm completely okay with that because i love my curves and curves in general :) I'm glad to hear your BF loves you as you are.
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  • edited December 2011
    I so glad there are other people out there that are like me. I used to be a lot thinner: a whole 100lbs thinner. At that point I was almost anorexic but anyway that 100 lbs is not healthy for me. I feel horrible almost all of the time... especially because of my family because I feel like they judge me. Luckily my FI loves me no matter what size I am but I know he is worried about me and my health. I want to lose weight but I don't want to be that person that doesn't eat what they like at the same time. I'm not that girl... I used to try to be and obviously look where that got me. How do you girls feel?
    image
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  • becunning2becunning2 member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    ...and here I was thinking this was a literal question.  And I had a goofy answer all made up about how I'd rather be a mermaid because they eat whale jerky in Japan, and who has ever heard of mermaid jerky?

    ...

    In all seriousness though, I definitely like it. I'm comfortable with my weight. I worked hard to lose 20 pounds (I'm at 150). I'd like to lose another 10, but I'm healthy and exercising, and that's important.

    ...I do wish I didn't have leg cellulite though.  Oh well, though. I'm smart, reasonably funy (I think so anyway), and I'm awesome even with leg cellulite. :)
  • lunarsongbirdlunarsongbird member
    2500 Comments Second Anniversary Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    Well- most of you ladies know what boat I'm in. After an ovarian surgery- I gained 100 pounds in two years. It was fast- and I have red shiny stretch marks on my thighs and tummy. I have a tummy roll like Lizzie in the picture above.

    I've been working out and have actually lost 20 pounds since I moved to Colorado. However- I can't see it in the mirror or in my clothes. ::shrugs:: I'm not going to discount it though. I'm in the 230s now,

    Here is something that has helped me...

    There are so many women that are bigger then me that I just think look amazing. I genuinely believe they are gorgeous. I wish I could shake them and say, "You are SOOO beautiful! Please don't believe anything else! You deserve every ounce of happiness in this world- no matter how much you weigh."

    And don't I deserve just the same?

    Check out the BMI project...
    http://kateharding.net/bmi-illustrated/

    Time and time again I look at those pictures and think the women who are "overweight" are the most perfect...I want to be "overweight."



    Don't let the BMI dicitate how beautiful you think you are...

    You find that weight that when you look in the mirror (without any cultural influences)- that you think to yourself, "Hm- yes- you look healthy and beautiful."
     
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  • edited December 2011
    I agree, it is important as a woman to embrace your body. Women are meant to have curves. We're meant to have breasts and hips. Honestly most men find curvy women more attractive, it's only natural. (I love the pic with Men's Ideal, Women's Ideal and Women's Average!)

    To me, health is more important than "looks". I am choosing to eat better and exercise more because I want to be healthy. Losing weight and feeling that I look better are added benefits to living a healthy lifestyle.

    I am currently 195 lbs, size 14 and considered obese by BMI standards. Wow, did I just say that out loud? For my height and age, I would need to lose about another 50 lbs to be considered "normal". I don't think that figure is completely off, but I was happy & comfortable with my body at 170 lbs as a size 10. That's where i'm trying to get back to. I don't need to be a size 4. In fact, I don't want to be!

    If you are content with your body - GREAT! If you ever think "I'd like to lose XX lbs. before my wedding/vacation/birthday/ect." though, then maybe you need to be honest with yourself and make some changes. Get a realistic perspective on what you're eating, how much you're exercising and where you want to be. I'm only feeling down about myself when I am not being honest with myself.
  • Elle1036Elle1036 member
    5000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 25 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    [QUOTE] We women, we gain weight because we accumulate so much wisdom and knowledge that there isn't enough space in our heads, and it spreads all over our bodies.
    Posted by lunarsongbird[/QUOTE]

    I get the point of the passage and generally support it, but this part annoyed me. I am thin; does that mean I'm not wise and knowledgeable?
  • Beads921Beads921 member
    1000 Comments Fourth Anniversary Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    I saw this on FBook too.

    The reality is, I'm a mermaid. I don't try to be, but this is my natural body type. It doesn't mean I love everything about my body - I wish I had curves! Buying clothes for this boyish body isn't easy. And it means I'm constantly battling a stigma that I'm weak and fragile and unhealthy. Those things aren't true. My life is completely full and awesome regardless of dress size.

    I fully agree that women of all shapes and sizes are beautiful, but I don't want my body type being bashed to make that point.
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  • edited December 2011
    I love this... Since I started college I have been between 135lbs and 168lbs. Right now I am 160lbs... I lost 20lbs last January and was at 148lbs. I liked being at 148 and I would love to be at 145. I am now a size 10, I was a 12 at 168lbs and then almost an 8 at 148lbs. I wouldn't mind getting back to the 8 but I'm not going to kill myself over it. I am pretty happy with my body.  I eat what I like, I try to eat at home so that I know how the food is made. I like working out once I get myself to the gym. My goals are to be healthy and enjoy my life just as I am in that moment.
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  • edited December 2011
    I think there is a huge confusion between being beautiful and being healthy.  There are many women who are beautiful who are also healthy.  There are other women who are beautiful who are not healthy.

    I also don't think that forwards like these do anything to help women become more healthy.  I think there is a fine line between body acceptance and realizing that you are not healthy.  I think that this is true no matter what size you are. 
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  • lunarsongbirdlunarsongbird member
    2500 Comments Second Anniversary Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_would-rather-mermaid-whale?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:00a088ba-de4d-47ca-bf2d-35a59266c5c7Post:e7bdf9ee-26de-4b12-bebc-3172aba02503">Re: Would you rather be a mermaid or a whale?</a>:
    [QUOTE]I think there is a huge confusion between beautiful and healthy.  There are many women who are beautiful who are also healthy.  There are other women who are beautiful who are not healthy. I also don't think that forwards like these do anything to help women become more healthy.  I think there is a fine line between body acceptance and realizing that you are not healthy.  I think that this is true no matter what size you are. 
    Posted by TheMutleys[/QUOTE]

    I would agree with this statement.

    I know many women that are considered "overweight" or "obese" that run 5Ks and walk marathons...

    Healthy is beautiful.

    I do find that forwards like these may help remind people that they don't necessarily need to hate themselves.
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  • edited December 2011
    I think this article sums up how I feel.  It is geared towards moms, but the message is the same. 

    http://blog.pigtailpals.com/2011/08/jess-weiner-gets-honest-about-her-body/

    In an all-time first, I’m going to ask that all of you read an article in a beauty magazine. The reason being, I think a lot of women are not being honest with themselves about their health. We are getting so many mixed messages – a culture that prizes thinness, a media that warns about an obesity epidemic, a group of advocates teaching body acceptance, and our own inner voices, more often than not telling us we are not good enough.

     
    The problem with all of this is that this is all focused on weight, and very little focuses on sustainable health. Most people who read this blog are women. A great many of us are mothers. I absolutely understand how easy it is to stop caring for yourself when you have a family and household and maybe a career that require so much from you. Even with all those demands on our shoulders…it isn’t a voucher to stop caring for the health or our bodies.
     
    If we don’t have our health, we aren’t living as authentically as we should be. We aren’t caring as well for our families, giving as much as we can at work. I don’t want to live life at 88% or 52%. I want to be 100%. I want to raise my daughter and son to care for their healthy bodies, to eat nutritiously, enjoy exercise and sports, and be able to listen when their body tells them something is off.
     
    So what happens when you are a well-known author and body image expert, and you realize your ‘body acceptance’ was actually putting your body at risk? While healthy human bodies can come in many shapes and sizes, that does not mean an individual body can be healthy at any size. When Jess Weinertook a trip to her trusted doctor and discovered she was at risk of being pre-diabetic, she got a big wake-up call.
     
     
    Jess took the steps and life-style changes necessary to bring her cholesterol, blood pressure, blood sugar, triglycerides, and weight back to healthy numbers that allowed her body to function at its metabolic best. Because I know Jess well and watched her as she did this, I think that was the easy part….
     
    Being honest about it, and going public with it, is a different story. Jess knew she would have critics. Jess knew she would have people who would say hurtful things. Jess published her body weight for the world to see, which I think is a number most women give way more importance to than is needed and would be scared to do.
     
    But the thing is, Jess got honest and Jess got healthy. So here’s what I want to know…Can you?
     
    Get fit, Mamas. Get healthy. Go to your doctor and get a check-up. Eat healthy. Exercise. Get yourself on in for that Pap smear. Make an appointment about that lump before another 6 months goes by. Go. To. The. Dentist. Be a health role model for your children.
     
    Love yourself and let your family see it. Your daughters are watching, taking it all in. My hope is that you are leaving them a legacy of HEALTH.


    Article in Glamour


     

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  • edited December 2011
    I really like everything you had to say Mutley. I was trying to say something similar regarding beauty vs. health, but your comments and the article you posted are much better worded than my post. I also agree that it is important to take an honest look at yourself, your habits and your health. It's OK to accept your body at any weight, but if your acceptance is detrimental to your health and longevity are you really OK with that? I'm not. That's why I choose to do something about it.

    In regards to the girls that are offended regarding slender body types, I apologise. I did not mean to imply that other body types are not attractive. Of course they are! Acceptance of my own curves does not mean that I judge your slender figure. I simply choose to embrace my own body type and hope others do the same.
  • Elle1036Elle1036 member
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    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_would-rather-mermaid-whale?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:00a088ba-de4d-47ca-bf2d-35a59266c5c7Post:8c00f904-0114-44e1-b245-5c526cdb41ae">Re: Would you rather be a mermaid or a whale?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Would you rather be a mermaid or a whale? : I was just about to post the same thing. I also hate the saying "real women have curves" because that implies that I am not a real woman. I think it's a wonderful thing for women to embrace and love who they are, inside and out, but I don't think it should be at the expense of others.
    Posted by jamierobin[/QUOTE]

    <div>Agree completely.</div>
  • deburnindeburnin member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_would-rather-mermaid-whale?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:00a088ba-de4d-47ca-bf2d-35a59266c5c7Post:c6ebb435-9984-4d8e-8563-abb9d2a0aaeb">Re: Would you rather be a mermaid or a whale?</a>:
    [QUOTE]I get the point of the passage and generally support it, but this part annoyed me. I am thin; does that mean I'm not wise and knowledgeable?
    Posted by Elle1036[/QUOTE]

    <div>I keep thinking the same thing when ever I see this... This and the "real women have curves" thing just makes me cringe. So now I’m dumb and not a real woman because I’m skinnier? I get that the point is for everyone to be accepting of their bodies, but you shouldn’t be doing it at the expense of others.</div>
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  • jemmini6jemmini6 member
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    edited December 2011
    The original message on the gym was horrible, so I get the sentiment of the response, but it's still offensive to thinner people because it's the exact same thing, just in reverse.

    I agree with Mutley that we need to focus more on health than size.  You can be healthy at a size 14 just as much as you can be healthy at a size 2.  But you can also be unhealthy at a size 14 just as much as you can be unhealthy at a size 2, so extensively promoting people to embrace their curves, etc can overlook the health issue.  "Healthy" is not a 'one size fits all' (pun intended) approach and people need to determine what's healthy for them and get there.  I still think it's important to be happy and confident with who you are at any size, but that should still accompany the goal to be healthy, KWIM?
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  • SopChickSopChick member
    1000 Comments Third Anniversary
    edited December 2011
    I agree with what you ladies have all said. No body type should be made to feel badly so that another can feel good, and tbh the 'real women have curves' thing has always bothered me too.

    I know that I'm obese, and I know that in order to maintain quality of life as I get older that needs to change. However, in the past I feel like I haven't valued myself and my body, and so in order to reach a 'healthy' weight I have used unhealthy tactics.

    I think for me personally, the first step to a healthier me is loving where I am along the journey. I need to be realistic about the work and commitment it will take, but I also need to learn to be kinder to myself. This is what I feel body acceptance should be, not an excuse or carte blanche. For me, I know I don't try for things, or push myself as hard, or stand up for things as much when I'm overweight. I don't take risks, I don't speak up. I think for me, acceptance involves developing a sense of self-worth regardless of size. More of acceptance as a human being, actually...

    I can see how the original message could be mean to slimmer people. I don't think the author meant it that way, but it can definitely be interpreted as such. I think all women should feel that they're beautiful and capable, regardless of size.


    **that second last paragraph is left a little run-on intentionally. I let myself type in stream of consciousness a bit, and I wrote some stuff I had never really articulated before.
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