Not Engaged Yet

I feel bad

 I have a coworker who is really nice to me.  We don't hang out at all outside of our job.  Anyway, she says she's super excited that I'm engaged.  She bought me a nice card to say congratulation.  She is  always talking about my wedding, including giving me dress ideas.  She always initiates these conversations.  

I've already told her that my FI and I are having a super small ceremony at City Hall.  I'm only inviting one coworker to the reception dinner because we've been friends for years and hang out outside of work.  I

I'm starting to feel kind of awkward about it when she brings up my wedding.  She's always saying I should ask her for help.  What should I do?  I keep telling her that the wedding is pretty far away, but she keeps talking about it. I,m not inviting her to the wedding, but I don't want her to feel bad.  

Re: I feel bad

  • edited December 2011
    not sure what the heck happened with the font.  Sorry.
  • edited December 2011
    I don't think there's much more you can do than what you are doing. 

    Keep thanking her for her offers of help while politely declining.  Beyond telling her "Oh, because of budget constraints, we're having a very small wedding. We won't be able to invite everyone we'd like to," there's not much more you can do.  Some people just don't get hints.
  • edited December 2011
    Many of my coworkers bombard me with wedding questions all of the time.  There was practically an all office conference on the fact that I bought a dress.  But just because you talk about these things (when prompted of course, no one likes the chick who's always talking about her wedding) doesn't mean your CWs expect an invitation.

    Have you ever heard of the term "work husband?"  It means a person you are super close with from 9-5 but not so much after work.  It sounds superficial but these relationships are actually vital to a workplace and sometimes taking them outside of work can ruin their simplicity.

    I'm getting off-topic but the rule is to only invite co-workers if you socialize with them on a regular basis outside of work.  If this woman doesn't fall in this description then don't fret.  She likely does not expect an invitation.
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  • edited December 2011
    Bean dip.  Bean dip bean dip bean dip.

    Bean dipping happens when someone brings up a topic you don't want to talk about.  Work bean dipping is a bit different, but here's how it goes:

    Person A: How goes the wedding plans?

    You:  They're great, thanks for asking.  Did you hear about the new proposal?

    And so on, and so forth.  Change topics like it's your life's work.

    RIP Dr. Irving Fishman - 10/1/19-7/25/10 - thank you for holding on for me.
    You made my wedding day complete.
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