Not Engaged Yet

There not even engeged yet!!!

My fiance and I are recently engaged- 5/10/09, and we were talking about planning an October wedding for next year. The only problrm with this: a couple we know, who are not even engaged yet, has been informing everyone that 10/10/10 is their date. Before I was enagged I thought nothing of this, but now that I am, I too want an October wedding. Everyone has told me (even her closest friend) that I'm the one with the ring on my finger so I should just start planning. But this woman has been telling us all of this date for weeks, and even gave her BF an ultimatium that he needed to propose to her by this upcoming October! She is a friend of mine so I don't want to upset her, but come on! I had my FI call her boyfriend up to find out if he plans to propose to her in time to plan the wedding on 10/10/10. His response: "No offense, but Jen has knwn about this date for a while now." YOUR NOT ENGAGED! IT'S NOT FAIR! Next Year my parent's anniversary falls on a Saturday in October, however it's the weekend after 10/10/10, so it wuold be too close, espeically because this guy will be part of our wedding party. It would be so nice to start a family tradition and honor my parents this way though.And get this!!!- they just told us they booked a venue..and still are not engaged yet!I'm furious! I have always dreamed of an October wedding with the foliage as a backdrop...and now I can't. If w eplan our wedding for later in the month the days become colder and rainer. I think we're now thinking of a September wedding, but we'e just going to have to see the dates that are available for our venue.It makes me upset that someone would be so selfish and rude. Although perhaps my feelings should be set aside since I should honor her request for that date? What would you do, any suggestions? Thanks for reading!Jennifer

Re: There not even engeged yet!!!

  • edited December 2011
    Unfortunately there are a lot of rude people. I think if you believe that they are going to last that long and be engaged soon you should have a one to one talk with her. I think it would be important to ask her why the date is so important. If it is only because of the 10-10-10 reason I think you should share that you want to get married on the weekend of your parents anniversary. Tell her it is important to you but you do not intend to upset her. She probably won't understand or be nice the first time but if she is mature I believe she will come around. Who knows she could even get pregnant and move up the wedding? Good luck and thank you for being nice on my blog. I know there are a lot of rude people who don't read the full situation. Good luck.
  • LindsayMareneLindsayMarene member
    edited December 2011
    I know I'm late!  But I don't think that you should hold back for anything.  She doesn't own that date or that weekend and certainly not the month.  I think that what I would do in that situation (not saying you should) is tell my friend my reasoning of why I want that weekend and if she doesn't respect it, tell her that I'm sorry that she thinks that her reasoning is more important than your's but that you have to do what you have to do to continue or rather start the tradition and that she will be invited and if she wants to come, she can.

    It's been a little while.

    But I hope if you're still struggling, I was able to assist just a bit!
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