Not Engaged Yet

Congrats vs. Best Wishes?

Sooo, being on this board and new ladies get engaged we all say "congratulations".

I have a good friend who is adament that proper etiquette is to say "best wishes" to the bride and "congratulation" to the groom. therefore, before I post on TK that's what I ALWAYS think of!

Personally I don't really care, congratulations all around. Has any one else heard of this/abide by this?

Re: Congrats vs. Best Wishes?

  • edited December 2011
    i have not ever heard of that. i just say congratulations to both.
  • edited December 2011
    That's...weird sounding, to be honest. "Best wishes" doesn't sound as good to me as "congratulations" does. Almost as though saying, "Good luck keeping him around and faithful!"

    Probably not what it should do, but that's where my mind goes. So that's why everyonne gets a "congratulations" form me.

    image
  • desertsundesertsun member
    5000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 25 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    I agree, that's a litlte weird. I like to say best wishes sometimes just for variety. But I don't think there's any rule about what you should say. Might be interesting to post this on Etiquette. :)
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  • babybchbumbabybchbum member
    1000 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    I aggree with Zip

    Best wishes seems as though you (as an outsider) have little faith that the relationship is going to make it to the wedding vs Congratulations is more of I'm happy for you and can't wait to see how your new chapter in life is going to be written
  • edited December 2011
    I've heard of it.  The idea is along the lines that the groom was successful in winning the hand of the bride, so he gets a "congratulations" whereas the bride gets "best wishes".

    However, this is clearly antiquated etiquette. Congratulations, best wishes, they all say the same thing to me!
    image
  • MattsPenguinMattsPenguin member
    Knottie Warrior 2500 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    Ha!  I just had this discussion with my friends about a month ago.  Yes, that is proper etiquette, for the reasons noelle24 stated above.  But I don't think that anyone follows it any more.

  • katanne9katanne9 member
    2500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_congrats-vs-wishes?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:228baca9-969e-4a02-903d-1d2e104efca2Post:de171a85-36e1-46f4-865b-d6d2b086147d">Re: Congrats vs. Best Wishes?</a>:
    [QUOTE]That's...weird sounding, to be honest. "Best wishes" doesn't sound as good to me as "congratulations" does. Almost as though saying, "Good luck keeping him around and faithful!" Probably not what it should do, but that's where my mind goes. So that's why everyonne gets a "congratulations" form me.
    Posted by zipis1[/QUOTE]


    AGREED! Best wishes sounds like you aren't excited.
  • ericswifeyericswifey member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    ditto noelle.
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