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Bridal Shower Questions

So yay I have off today, I can post during the day.

I am MOH in my sister's wedding in August we are are already trying to put together the bridal shower. I got the guest list from my sister.  However she did not include out of town ( meaning not in the same state) relatives or guests on her list?  My thought was even though they most likely won't show up because it's so far since they are being invited to the wedding they should be invited to the shower.  Am I right or no?  No big deal either way.

Then she invited kids of her friends, but those kids won't be invited to the wedding, is that ok?  

I just don't want to offend or confuse people by who is or isn't invited to the shower.  Any advice given is helpful

Luckily not too bad.


Re: Bridal Shower Questions

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    cu97tigercu97tiger member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited January 2012
    I don't think she should invite the kids to the shower. That gives the impression that they will be invited to the wedding.

    When are you planning on having the shower? 6-7 months out is way too early, in my opinion. I have recently had to go back through our registry and take out some items and replace them with others because they are no longer available. I was lucky that no one had bought a set of our dishes, for example.

    With respect to the out-of-town family... I've lived away from my hometwon for 19 years. It's always kind of bugged me that I don't get an invitation, but then I end up going in on the gift anyway. Half the time, I get blindsided because I didn't even know when the party was. I say, if your sister wants them to know they are welcome, they should be invited, regardless of the likelihood of them showing up.

    ETA: That is a pretty dress!
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    I am trying to book the venue in the next month or so for a May/June event she is getting married at the end of August.

    She left the out of town people off the list, but I feel like they should be invited anyway.  I don't agree with invited the kids, unless they are invited to the wedding so I have to talk to her about that.

    Thank you tiger!


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    So what my FSIL suggested for ours is to only invite people to the shower who are invited to the wedding - this includes their children. I requested no kids at the shower just because it is a child-free wedding. She also suggested that I do not invite out of town guests who won't come for both, because it would make me appear gift grabby.

    Also... it's early to plan the shower. My guest list changed and evolved a lot in the last 6 months. Maybe wait until 3 months out. :) Hope that helps.
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    I would only invite people that are invited to the wedding. If someone doesn't have childcare available that day and wants to come, it's up to you if they are able to bring the kiddo(s) with on a person-by-person basis.

    I personally would invite OOT guests. Many family members and friends would send a shower gift regardless of their ability to attend in person. It's nice for them to know they were invited.

    BM dresses are cute! The color is pretty bright, but at least it looks comfy and current. Woo hoo to that!
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    I'm with everyone else in that it's a bit early for a shower, and to only invite people who are invited to the wedding. However, I have sent invites to friends OOT that I knew wouldn't be able to come and there was definitely no pressure to come, but I thought it would be nice to know we were thinking about them. Some call during the shower just to say a quick hello to the bride. Others sometimes sent gifts (though that was definitely not expected). 

    But, I diifer in that I think you can invite adult women (if this isn't a co-ed shower) without their children. I dunno, I never really thought of it as an insult to not invite childrent to the shower (even if they were invited to the wedding). It's a few hours of cheesy,, adult fun with wine and games and unwrapping gifts. Unless it was a new mother nursing, every mom who has come has been pleased as punch to leave their tots with dad for a few hours on a saturday or sunday morning/midafternoon. 
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    I second everything Tiger said, especially that inviting kids to the shower might give the impression that they are also invited to the wedding.
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    Thank you guys for the advice.  I really appreciate it.  It is soon to look, and plan it but her STD's are going out soon I believe. So I'm quite sure she has her final guest list now.

    I <3 you guys.


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    So for us, my MIL insisted that I have a Tucson bridal shower, in addition to my Mom/Sister's Phoenix bridal shower. I totally get it... 1/3 the wedding guests live in Phoenix and 1/3 live in Tucson, and the remainder live out of state. What we did makes sense for our situation. I didn't want to be gift grabby, so I insisted that no one gets invited to both unless they wanted to be.
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