Not Engaged Yet

Wedding location inquiry....

So I'm not engaged yet, but it's obviously close :]   I don't really want to get married back home but I feel I'm too far from my family to have one where I live now.  Is it a big deal to just pick a church anywhere?  or would it be too hectic to plan a wedding in a town that I nor no one I know lives in?  Any ideas/advice you've got would be great!

Re: Wedding location inquiry....

  • edited December 2011
    You should get married where you want to but also be open to what other people have to say. Keep in mind that if you don't have it in your hometown then there may be some people who just can't afford to attend due to travel costs and you will have to decide if you are okay with that.
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  • edited December 2011
    It depends how far it is and how much you know about the town.

    I could plan a wedding in my hometown (which is 2 days away from here) in like, an hour. No problem.

    But if we went with plan A and got married in Florida, which I know nothing about... it would be really difficult to actually make choices on vendors and locations that I was comfortable and confident about.

    Would you be able to make several trips to meet with vendors and see locations and goods?

    How confident are you about making decisions based on phone conversations and email?

    There are a lot of questions involved with this kind of decision. One of the big ones-- will you be paying for everything yourself, and if not how does whoever is paying feel about that idea?

    We would have LOVED to have a tiny destination wedding, but we didn't have the money to pay for it without anyone's help. My dad's budget came with a bigger guest list than we wanted.

    You don't really know all the answers until you're engaged and start talking budget and guest list, really. But you can probably gauge your own gut feelings about planning from far away. It may be an idea to pursue when the time comes, or you may realize you're not actually comfortable with it.
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  • edited December 2011
    Oh, and you have to consider how willing everyone is to travel, and how much it matters to you to have everyone there.
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  • edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_wedding-location-inquiry?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:79e6190f-a276-40a0-9610-6e75218f3862Post:904506ab-11ad-4e37-aa00-2beac5b9770c">Wedding location inquiry....</a>:
    [QUOTE]So I'm not engaged yet, but it's obviously close :]   I don't really want to get married back home but I feel I'm too far from my family to have one where I live now.  Is it a big deal to just pick a church anywhere?  or would it be too hectic to plan a wedding in a town that I nor no one I know lives in?  Any ideas/advice you've got would be great!
    Posted by courtstar[/QUOTE]


    Don't spend any time worry about this until you are actually engaged.  There is no point. 
  • katanne9katanne9 member
    2500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    1. Get engaged before you begin worrying about this.

    2. While it's been very difficult to plan my wedding that is taking place in my hometown (which is very far away from where I live), it has been totally worth it.
  • paintgirlpaintgirl member
    1000 Comments Third Anniversary
    edited December 2011
    We will be in a similar situation. Our families are in different cities, 3-5 hours from here. I COULD do a wedding in my hometown but after having been gone for years, I really feel no connection to the place, and my bf has only been there twice, so he definitely doesn't have any connection to it.

    We don't plan to live where we are now forever, but I think we are more likely to get married here than near either of our families. I'm not sure we're the sentimental types that would go back to the site of our wedding every year or something like that, so that's not an issue.

    We've also talked about a destination wedding. We probably won't have a very elaborate wedding, so we could plan a destination wedding in a visit or two.
  • hetshuphetshup member
    2500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I originally planned to go home for the wedding, even had plane tickets budgeted into my budget. However, we had been engaged for three weeks and I freaked out b\c I felt that my friends wouldn't be able to make it, and I really wanted them there. So we switched it to where I currently live and where we went to school. It's also alumni weekend, so they will have all their college friends here. And my hometown friends might make it, but they have plenty of time to plan.


    But get engaged first, your BF might blow every idea you have right out of the water. If you are already talking about it, congrats you're engaged!
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  • paintgirlpaintgirl member
    1000 Comments Third Anniversary
    edited December 2011
    Hetshup has a good point. I thought bf would be happy with a JOP or something really, really informal, but it turns out he wants more than I expected. So unless you've discussed details, bf might really throw things off! Good luck.
  • mrsmamsiemrsmamsie member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Like a few other have said, I would wait until you get engaged to worry about location.  I had a bit of a plan in my head before we got engaged, but didn't set it in stone until after we got engaged.  We decided on his hometown for the wedding and reception, and a second reception later this summer in my hometown.  I am currently living abroad and planning has been really tough (thankfully our mothers are awesome!).  I would recommend getting married someplace that you know and can easily get to for planning.

    Good Luck!
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