Freaking out!

Smashleyk

Ik this is crazy to be freaking out about but! Heres our dilemma, FI and I live in florida, weddings gonna be in Wisconsin. When it comes to judgment on locations for things my mother has poor judgement/taste (anything will do) my sister is unreliable to even getting to an appointment if I make one for her and FMIL just had spinal surgery so she immobile... The two locations were trying to decide on for the ceremony are as follows Ones a church, FI and I arnt especially religous. But it will do. A new sailing center with ceiling length windows that over look the city -we'll have to rent chairs -$500 refundable deposit on top of the rental fee -the room is bare as shyt and I have NO clue what we'd need to dress it -plus any rental items we bring in must be removed after the event by us. So what do you all think!? What would we need to dress the sailing room?

Smashleyk

Forgot to add! Why I'm freaking out lol is because the church needs to know by Thursday or they're giving it to the other couple that's interested. Pfff

ceh789

Use the church, no question.

artbyallie

I disagree with PP wholeheartedly. Do not use a church if you aren't devoted to that faith. It is disrespectful to believers to use it as a pretty backdrop and nothing more.

Smashleyk

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_ceremony-ideas_freaking-out-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:10Discussion:d6daa60d-d66e-47a1-adbd-0e587fd91aa0Post:ca8d33f1-b40d-480c-834a-91ab4103bd6e">Re: Freaking out!</a>:
[QUOTE]I disagree with PP wholeheartedly. Do not use a church if you aren't devoted to that faith. It is disrespectful to believers to use it as a pretty backdrop and nothing more.
Posted by artbyallie[/QUOTE]




That's exactly how I feel, I think we're going to scratch that. IM glad you said that.. thought I was the only one who thought it was weird. plus if FI and I have never been in a church together before I thought it would be strange our first time for our wedding day, now I just need to figure out how to dress the bare location

Sscholfield

The sailing center sounds beautiful! Can you add ceiling drapery with lights? What about colored floor lights? That would add a lot to the space, along with centerpieces on the tables. Where in WI is the venue, if you don't mind me asking?

ceh789

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_ceremony-ideas_freaking-out-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:10Discussion:d6daa60d-d66e-47a1-adbd-0e587fd91aa0Post:ca8d33f1-b40d-480c-834a-91ab4103bd6e">Re: Freaking out!</a>:
[QUOTE]I disagree with PP wholeheartedly. Do not use a church if you aren't devoted to that faith. It is disrespectful to believers to use it as a pretty backdrop and nothing more.
Posted by artbyallie[/QUOTE]
Churches rent their space for dozens of secular community events every year.  As long as your event isn't specifically offensive to the church and it's teachings (i.e. a Planned Parenthood outreach at a Catholic church) there is absolutely nothing wrong or disrespectful with using the facility.

Rachel405

I would choose whichever option your gut tells you. Whichever one you will be less stressed about leading up to your wedding. Decorating a blank canvas could get pricey/expensive/difficult since you don't live near it, and having it at a church might make you feel uncomfortabke if you aren't religious. On the other end, there are positives to each as well. Go with whatever option you think you will fret less about as you plan for the wedding!

artbyallie

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_ceremony-ideas_freaking-out-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:10Discussion:d6daa60d-d66e-47a1-adbd-0e587fd91aa0Post:ac706660-7c7b-4684-9d33-b8431cd17b23">Re: Freaking out!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Freaking out! : Churches rent their space for dozens of secular community events every year.  As long as your event isn't specifically offensive to the church and it's teachings (i.e. a Planned Parenthood outreach at a Catholic church) there is absolutely nothing wrong or disrespectful with using the facility.
Posted by ceh789[/QUOTE]

<div>But those things are different from a wedding. Those events do not involve a pastor blessing a union of two people as per the Bible. I have nothing against secular marriage, but I do not like the idea of people who do not intend to follow the Bible's teaching participating in a Christian wedding. If the wedding is taking place with a JOP in the fellowship hall, that would not be offensive to me. In the sanctuary with a preacher? I just don't get why anyone would do that if it means nothing to them.</div><div>
</div><div>Do you see the difference? Having, say, a community festival in the church facilities is worlds apart from a ceremony in the sanctuary. Plus, I don't know any churches that rent out their sanctuary for secular events.</div>

ceh789

I didn't get the impression that OP intended to use a preacher and I definately didn't gather she would be celebrating a Christian ceremony.  I'm not even sure where she would find a preacher to marry her if she doesn't share their faith.  If those things are true then I'd agree it is not appropriate to use a church.  As I said - your secular event should not be blasphemous to the people who own the building you are renting.

To me, without the religious trappings it's just a building.  I bring my faith to the church, as do my fellow parishioners, we don't gather there because the building has any particular significance - that actually smacks of idolatry to me.

Jiggy12

I'm not sure what your budget is, but it sounds like this is the perfect time for you to look into a wedding coordinator that is in the area.  (check out weddingwire.com if you don't know where to find one.)  You interview her, take a look at weddings she's done and then know that she will take care of the details that you can't from being so far away which will allow you to have the wedding at the sailing center.  Plus, she'll be familiar with the locals and where she can score deals that you won't be able to find from where you're at.  Also, that way no one will get their feelings hurt when you turn down their ideas. 

If a planner is out of your budget, then I agree with the post about having your wedding at night with candles and using those beautiful window views to your advantage!  Sometimes simple is classier and more elegant than having lots of decorations. 

Smashleyk

Thank you all for your thoughts! We decided against it because its just not us and wouldnt feel right on our day, and horribly enough also because there's only street parking on a holiday weekendWhen probably have about 15 people make it in by the time everyone found a parking spot!