Ring questions- man-made/conflict free diamonds

bethekx7

My boyfriend and I are shopping for rings and I feel like I'm being a little picky in reverse. I REALLY don't want a diamond. I don't agree with how they are mined, sold, price, etc. (And I don't want an emerald, ruby etc.)
SO...
I am trying to convince my boyfriend to buy me a man-made diamond or conflict-free diamond. However, everything I'm reading is really confusing.

Does anyone have a man-made diamond (or something similar), bought a conflict-free diamond (brilliant earth or elsewhere), or have any helpful, FIRSTHAND information?

Where did you buy it? Can you tell a difference? What was the price like?
Thanks!

MissOnnaleese

Sit down and have an adult conversation about why its important to you to have something other than a diamond. He can get alternatives such as moisantte or a different kind of stone without it being 'cheap'

loopy82

I have a ring from Blue Nile.  I have a GIA (I think it is) certification that came with my center stone. The stone beautiful. Due to Blue Nile be strictly online (as far as I know) the prices were great. My FI is all about doing tons of research before he makes a big purchase. He really like the pricing and quality of Blue Nile. I know there are a few other girls on here who have rings from there as well.

hetshup

In order to avoid a conflict stone, my cousin purchased a vintage ring for his wife. It may not have been conflict free at that time, but it's one less diamond that needed to come from Africa.


As for the grown stones, they tend to come from a diamond chip that is used as a seed for the larger stone. I've seen a show where they had a GIA guy compare, they seemed fine, but would not correctly refract light or something like that.

PaigeMcC

Buy a Canadian diamond.  We're conflict free.

zaneopal

Jumping off the Canadian diamonds, Brilliant Earth has some nice rings, and they're certified conflict-free on all their stones. They even have lab-created stones as well, if you take issue with mining practices.

Of course, if you have problems with the mining processes (I'm not touching that, I date a mining engineer--I know all arguments for both sides), my best advice would be to look for an antique/heirloom ring. Even if you don't like the particular style, you could get the stones reset into a style you DO like. As a PP said, it's one or a few less stones being currently mined or coming from Africa.

If you just plain old don't like diamonds, who says you HAVE to have a diamond? Get a ruby or a pearl or whatever it is you DO like. The ring is a symbol. Blame DeBeers for that whole "a diamond is forever" nonsense. It's just a marketing slogan--it doesn't actually mean anything.

musikbx

Boyfriend and I are currently shopping for a ring, and I have the same concerns. I am opposed to diamonds for the moral reasons you alluded to. 

A ring from Brilliant Earth is our current front runner. However, some people may point out that there are a lot of ecological concerns about mining for Canadian diamonds. [Personally, I just can't have a conflict diamond sitting on my finger when I go to work for an NGO to help the same people my ring has exploited! Even if it is Kimberly certified, I'm not about to trust that the miners haven't found a way around the certification process]

We've considered going the non-diamond route. For that, there are some cute eco-friendly rings at Green Karat.com. If you don't like any of the designs, they also have a custom option. One last idea, check Esty.com - not only do they have cool designs, but you are supporting independent artists.

zaneopal

Turtle Love Committee also has some really nice eco-friendly rings, and all very reasonably priced. No diamonds, but if you're both willing to go another route, it's worth it.

its apelila

We went with moissanite, mainly because I didnt care if it was a "real" diamond or not, and it was a LOT more affordable.

 We custom designed my ring through a local private jeweler, and when we ordered the stone the jeweler said it is one of the most beautiful moissanites she'd seen. 

For a 3/4ct. triangle cut diamond, Helzberg wanted about $3000.  For the stone.
Opting for moissanite, we were able to get the stone AND the band, which has real diamonds on the sides for about $1600. 

Now I am just patiently waiting for him to officially propose with it! 

Goldlie11

Google the Kimberly process.  Most reputable jewelers do not sell conflict stones.  I know that my jeweler whiteflash.com does not sell conflict stones.  

paintgirl

Anyone care to enlighten me on the conflict deal? I know the basics, but Zane alluded to arguments for both sides. I've only heard one side. Anyone have a quick link or two that would explain both sides? I need the short version, because my attention span is....

what were we talking about?

leia1979

My coworker recommended Brilliant Earth to me as well. She actually has a pale blue sapphire ring. Brilliant Earth also has a pretty cool looking design-your-own system. The BF and I were geeking out that you can get a 3D CAD model of the ring design.

Simply Fated

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_ring-questions-man-madeconflict-diamonds?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:8435c214-3526-40f8-aa8e-a9e034455b64Post:3e0dd8fd-d5e4-4556-830f-637b624d2e83">Re: Ring questions- man-made/conflict free diamonds</a>:
[QUOTE]Anyone care to enlighten me on the conflict deal? I know the basics, but Zane alluded to arguments for both sides. I've only heard one side. Anyone have a quick link or two that would explain both sides? I need the short version, because my attention span is.... what were we talking about?
Posted by paintgirl[/QUOTE]
Conflict diamonds, or blood diamonds, are diamonds that are mined in bad situations, like wars, to finance that war, or bad situation.

Conflict diamonds are diamonds illegally traded to fund conflict in war-torn areas, particularly in central and western Africa. The United Nations (UN) defines conflict diamonds as "...diamonds that originate from areas controlled by forces or factions opposed to legitimate and internationally recognized governments, and are used to fund military action in opposition to those governments, or in contravention of the decisions of the Security Council." These diamonds are sometimes referred to as "blood diamonds."
<a href="http://www.diamondfacts.org/conflict/index.html" rel="nofollow">http://www.diamondfacts.org/conflict/index.html</a>

Conflict diamonds, sometimes called blood diamonds, are diamonds that are sold to fund the unlawful and illegal operations of rebel, military and terrorist groups.
<a href="http://jewelry.about.com/cs/diamondmining/a/diamonds.htm" rel="nofollow">http://jewelry.about.com/cs/diamondmining/a/diamonds.htm</a>


A well reputed jeweler will have proper papers to prove they are not associated with conflict diamonds. The Kimberly Process can let you know exactly where the diamond came from.

zaneopal

Sorry to confuse you Paint -- I meant both sides of the mining argument (pro- and anti-diamond or anything really mining). I can't really see a good argument for conflict diamonds. They aren't helping anyone.

I stand by my comment earlier that the only reason we think we need diamonds for things like engagement rings is because DeBeers has an extremely good marketing department, and came up with that whole "A Diamond is Forever" nonsense.

mrsmamsie

My FI and I picked out a Vintage ring, I not only prefer the old style of diamond cutting (not so Bling-Bling) but i also like to *think* that the diamonds were conflict free when they were unearthed some 85 years ago!

paintgirl

Zane - Got you. I thought some people were disagreeing that conflict diamonds are in fact unethical/immoral.

Soooo... Think of the major "mall" jeweler chains - Helzberg, Kay, Jared - would they have conflict diamonds or would they have papers to prove their diamonds are "good"?

(Sorry for so many questions - I'm not exactly up on this issue.)

zaneopal

The mall jewelers, if they diamonds truly are conflict free, will have paperwork certifying it as such, and will include the name of the mine the diamond was sourced from. However, I'm slightly skeptical.

I'm leaning towards either a lab created diamond, or using my mom's (if she'll let us). Unless BF gets this job at a diamond mine in Canada...jk.

Ward0317

My bf and I have decided to go with moissonit because its cheaper and conflict free. we can get exactly what i want for a really affordable price. we are going to a local jeweler and i am designing it and she is making it. Its fun and affordable. I cant tell the difference between moissonite and a diamond. the jeweler and either. he said he has to test them to tell the difference.

paintgirl

Good information! Thanks all!