NWR: Minor Family Crisis

finallytime37

Ok Everyone, I need some advice. I'll try to make this short and sweet.

My younger sister has been engaged to her FI for just about 2 years, and are supposed to get married next fall.  In the past couple of days her FI was arrested for stealing from his job and selling the merchandise.  He's in some pretty big trouble.  She's and he are both going to be 24 this November.  She is not sure what she wants to do, and seeing as how I'm her older sister and in a stable relationship - she wants advice.  I told her she should get some space from him and try to figure out her feelings.  She is a criminal justice major - headed into corrections and nervous about how this might effect her and her career.  Any thoughts/advice are welcome..I'm trying to stay hands off and encourage her to sort through her own feelings - but she's persistent.  HELP!

bethsmiles

I say stick with what you are doing. IMO you never want to tell someone what to do in a situation like this. Any decision she makes needs to be 100% hers, I agree with you she needs to take some space and figure out her feelings and also how this will affect her career.

jeanacorina

I think the advice you gave is really good. She needs to distance herself a little and really think about how she feels and what's important to her.

Personally, I would have a huge moral issue staying with someone who could steal. It makes me wonder what else they're capable of. It's such a selfish thing.

She needs to figure out if that's how she feels, and how important her future career is to her.

StarGazingHiker

I think the advice you gave her sounds perfect. IMO, she definitely has to do some soul searching and figure out what she really wants. My advice is to be there for her and listen to her. She'll probably want to run her thoughts by you and the best thing you can do is just listen. Good luck to you and to your sister!

tafft1

You are giving her good advice and I am sorry to hear she is going through this right now. She is smart to be concerned how this may affect her - in more than just on an emotional level but career wise as well. As someone who is engaged to someone who works for the Sherrif's Office - things like this *can* affect it , but it really depends. In no way am I offering my own advice - just agreeing with what has been said. I hope it works out and the best thing you can do is be there for her. *hugs* Wishing you both the best.

bananapudding91

The adivce you've given her seems to be best. No one can really tell her how to feel; she needs to figure it out on her own.

I couldn't be with someone who had the nerve to do something like that, myself. Just do your best to be there for her emotionally, and let her know you can't make such important decisions for her (although, it seems you already have).

Good luck to both you and your sister! I wish you the best.

finallytime37

Thanks for all the advice everyone! She was supposed to talk to him....but i havent heard from her.  Hopefully she has the good sense to walk away...at least for now..if not for good.