Today feels odd

tafft1

I don't know how i feel about today - i got a call from my gyno today that my pap smear came back abnormal and they found cancerous cells and now i have a biopsy and coloscopy scheduled for Halloween , of all days , which happens to also be my late mother's birthday. i'm in shock , i'm scared , but i also know that this dosen't mean this is the end of the world and at this point just because of what they found it may not even be cancer..we just don't know. My husband was obviously taken by surprise and very supportive and worried obviously because i am ut for now until more results come back we are keeping a positive outlook. I admit I never thought it would happen , but since it has all we can do is move forward one day at a time.

Has there ever been anything in your life that has just kind of stopped you in your tracks like this ? If so , how did you overcome it ? ( not looking for an answer for myself just curious)

jedoublefdoubles

Oh no

I'm so sorry that you received such crummy news and I don't know what else to say but I will be sending thoughts/prayers your way.

The only thing "big" I've had to face is depression and having someone to talk to (outside of family and friends) helped me greatly. Would it be too soon to seek the assistance of a support group or therapist? I know that I'm a worst-case scenerio kind of person but it sounds that you are being very positive and taking it one thing at a time-which is good!

elannis

I agree that you have a great attitude about it all, but I am so sorry that you're going through this. I'm happy your husband is being great about it too! I'll be sending thoughts and prayers your way as well!

Peaseblossom55

Sorry to hear...... but it sounds like you are handling this well and have a positive outlook.  Luckily you ahve your husband to support you in this situation.  I hope all turns out ok, and keeping you in my prayers!

Swazzle

I'm sorry you're dealing with this!  The unknown aspect of it is definitely scary but luckily Halloween is just around the corner & hopefully you'll have the results back right away!

I actually had my annual last year right before I spent 10 days in Europe.  My flight landed & I turned on my phone, had a bunch of voice mails, 1 of which was from my OB/GYN saying to call back when I could.  I was terrified.  My doctor NEVER calls me unless it's serious (I assume, he himself has never needed to call me).  Naturally it was a Friday night & the office wasn't open until Monday so I had to wait all weekend to find out that my pap was abnormal.  I ended up going in for another test (I forget what it's called, where they scrape cells off of the cervix).  I ended up testing positive for HPV which was scary at first until I realized how common it is.  My doctor opted to just leave it be & I have this year's appointment next week.  I'm nervous to go but I feel like it's better to know what's going on than to not know because then whatever it is/may be can progress.  

Be strong, Tafft.  It'll be ok!  PM me if you want to talk.  :::hugs:::

peekaboo2011

I had a similar thing as RDR.  Except they called me before a physics exam.  Needless to say, that didn't go so hot.  I ended up falling apart to my roommates.  HPV freaked me out tremendously...but it went away on its own in like 3 months. 

I'll be thinking about you Tafft. *hugs*

lunarsongbird

I had the same feeling when I got diagnosed with a grapefruit sized tumor on my ovary.

Unfortunately, we deal with health problems in my family all the time... So they way we deal with it- is get the best, most appropriate care you can- and know that you are doing everything in your power to be healthy.

I also cried when I was overwhelmed. And I went to see Twilight a number of times- because I liked the movie and it gave me warm and fuzzies. I gave myself permission to rest and take care of myself.

::hugs::

So these are precancerous cells, right? Was the colonoscopy already scheduled? Or do you have a history of colon cancer/issues in the family?

Beads921

I had an irregular pap come back last year. They waited 6 months and re-did it, but which time the abnormal cells had gone back to normal I guess? My next follow-up is next month, and if that one comes back normal I'm in the clear. Otherwise...well...I'm not really sure.

I'll cross my fingers for you. It's scary, but just take it one step at a time.

polkadot111

Well just yesterday I went in to urgent care because I was thinking I had bv again- and turns out I do. But, in the urine culture they found a bunch of protein. It could be a large number of things. But, it also could be an autoimune defficiency or else it could be diabetes. So, now I'm kind of freaking out. And she wanted to wait a few weeks until my body is back to normal once I'm treated from this BV to go to a different doctor about it. Eeek.

tafft1

Thank you for all the comments and advice and kind thoughts. It feels a bit surreal but i know panicking about it and going worst case will do nothing for my health or my sanity , so i am trying to keep everything "normal" as much as possible. At this point waiting is just the hardest part.

jorja86

I had an abnormal pap in college. I don't even think they tested me for HPV, because it's so common I think they just assumed that's what caused it. I had the colposcopy (where they "wash" your cervix with a vinegar solution to help identify the abnormal area, and then scrape cells from those areas) and that wasn't any more uncomfortable than a regular pap smear. I also ended up needing a biopsy, which was rather painful, but after all that, I just ended up needing pap smears every 6 months for two years. If you get a pap every year, it's highly unlikely that anything will have progressed very far-cervical cancer is generally really slow growing. I'm really sorry you're going through this. Keep us updated.

tafft1

Thanks for the helpful advice and experince Jorja it's apreciated. So on top of all this i've had another issue bugging me - my period never arrived after the last 8 months or so of it being fairly regular for me. So of course my mind goes to one thing and i test myself at home and get some positive pregnancy results back. HOWEVER , i read and confirmed with my doctor that often with abnormal pap smears the same hormone , HGC can be detected and show false positives. So last night i went into the lab at my doctor to have them do a urine analysis. It came back inconclusive , so i'm waiting for them to get back to me to figure out if there is anything else i should do right now. This waiting game sucks