In light of my Special-ness

loves2shop4shoes

How did you meet your SO?  When I transferred colleges, BF was my student advisor at transfer orientation.  He had to show me around and help me pick classes.

How long was it between meeting and first date? About 2 months.

How long was it between first date and exclusivity? A few weeks

How long between exclusivity and moving in together?  (If applicable) About 2 years.

How long between exclusivity and engagement?  Hasn't happened yet.

How long between engagement and marriage? Hasn't happened yet.

How long between marriage and BABY MAKING?  No idea...probably at least 5 years.

Do you think your age made a difference in your timelines?  Not really.  I think it was just a natural progression into a relationship.

Do you think that the age at which you meet affects the timeline of your relationship?  I think it can to an extent.  I mean if you've known each other since you were 5, then obviously it does.  But in typical circumstances, I think it depends on the couple.

zipis1

How did you meet your SO?
We met through a friend (who shared the bathroom with me in our dorms) at anime club. They'd been friends since high school.

How long was it between meeting and first date?
about two years, I think.

How long was it between first date and exclusivity?
Immediate

How long between exclusivity and moving in together?  (If applicable)
Imediate here, too. We were housemates before we started dating, so when we started to date we already lived together. It was maybe 2 months or so before he moved into my room, though.

How long between exclusivity and engagement?
So far three years. We'll see how much longer.

How long between engagement and marriage?
N/A. Though in my head we'll have maybe a year engagement. We'll see.

How long between marriage and BABY MAKING?  (This one's just for me - or you can put in your estimated timeline)
Never. I am not a kid person. I leave that to my sister :P

Do you think your age made a difference in your timelines?  Do you think that the age at which you meet affects the timeline of your relationship?
We're about four years apart, so I don't think the age difference had too big an impact. However, as I was barely 18 when we met, and almost 20 when we started dating, I think that definitely has had an impact on our timelines, mostly due to financial reasons.

catemeg

Great questions!  I'm really interested to read everyone's responses... right now, though, my feet feel like they're about to fall off as I've been running around in heels since 6am this morning.  My event went off nearly perfectly, but I'm sooo exhausted that I'll be reading this all later!!!

How did you meet your SO?
Playing kickball - we were on the same team, he got me a job interview with his company, we became friends, I got the job, we made out, we started dating, we started working together, we both quit the job within a month of each other after working together for 6 months, and have been together ever since!!!

How long was it between meeting and first date?
3 months.  We had both been dating other people - he actually had a blind date he blew off the night we first kissed.  He blew it off to stay in and play Monopoly with me.

How long was it between first date and exclusivity?
Immediately.  We were such good friends, it was all or nothing.  I was really nervous at first that if it didn't work out I'd lose the friendship, so we kept it to ourselves for a couple of weeks.

How long between exclusivity and moving in together?  (If applicable)
He spent 2-3 nights a week at my place more or less immediately.  Within 3 months, he was there all the time, but it was still my place.  After 5 months, he had a key.  Total, about 1.5 years before we officially moved in together.

How long between exclusivity and engagement?
Will be somewhere between 2-3 years

How long between engagement and marriage?
That depends on when he asks - August/September 2012 is when we'll be getting married, so sometime before then.  We'll probably book the venue this fall, regardless, then wait on everything else.

How long between marriage and BABY MAKING?  (This one's just for me - or you can put in your estimated timeline)
We're going to wait until we figure out what military life is all about.  Probably at least 3 years, so that we can get established in his first duty station.  If it's overseas, possibly longer since my mother has made me swear I'll keep her grandkids somewhat close to her (continental US works).

Do you think your age made a difference in your timelines?  Do you think that the age at which you meet affects the timeline of your relationship? It can.  I don't think it affected us.  If anything, I expected to be completely single through my 20's.  It was him, not my age, that made things different.  But the only factor that affects our timeline is the military - otherwise we'd probably live in sin until we decided to start a family (somewhere around 30-ish).

nefariousmango

How did you meet your SO? On OKCupid.  No joke.

How long was it between meeting and first date? 2 months

How long was it between first date and exclusivity? Um, a day?  He assumed it was from the start, and who was I to let him down??

How long between exclusivity and moving in together?  (If applicable) 2 years

How long between exclusivity and engagement? 4 years

How long between engagement and marriage? 11 months

How long between marriage and BABY MAKING?  (This one's just for me - or you can put in your estimated timeline)  Um, depends.  At least three years, hopefully less than ten.


Do you think your age made a difference in your timelines? Maybe- We met so young (19) that a year or two later was too young to be engaged (for us/ our backgrounds)

 Do you think that the age at which you meet affects the timeline of your relationship?  Yes

meamolly

How did you meet your SO?
We met on plenty of fish.

How long was it between meeting and first date?
We "met" online three weeks before we went on our first date wich was Dec 26th.

How long was it between first date and exclusivity?
That night

How long between exclusivity and moving in together?  (If applicable)
We have a joke that we are still on our first date. He never really left.  He did have the place he rented with friends but since it was in a corner of the basment and it was cold, he pretty much moved in at my insisting. He stayed there but his stuff was at the house. We "officaly" moved in togeather about six months later.

How long between exclusivity and engagement?
Na

How long between engagement and marriage?
Na

How long between marriage and BABY MAKING?  (This one's just for me - or you can put in your estimated timeline)
Na


Do you think your age made a difference in your timelines?  Do you think that the age at which you meet affects the timeline of your relationship?
Not really on both. He is the first guy I have dated that is older than I am.  I know all the other two guys I was exclusive with just were not on the same page as I was since they were younger than I. BF and I both know marrage will happen when the time is right. Now we are just enjoying the ride.

BCRockies

How did you meet your SO?
We lived in the same apartment building during college. His roommate (who I knew from college) dragged me out to a bar on a Friday, introduced us and walked away.

How long was it between meeting and first date?
1 week

How long was it between first date and exclusivity?
About 2 months. I had just gotten out of a relationship and was unsure I wanted to jump into another right away so we took it slow.

How long between exclusivity and moving in together?  (If applicable)
2 years. Waited until we were both out of college and had jobs.

How long between exclusivity and engagement?
Almost 5 years and counting.

How long between engagement and marriage?
N/A

How long between marriage and BABY MAKING?  (This one's just for me - or you can put in your estimated timeline)
Not any time soon ~ probably around 5-7 years. We want to be financially stable before children and enjoy our relationship for a while. We have plans to do some traveling in the next few years.

Do you think your age made a difference in your timelines?  Do you think that the age at which you meet affects the timeline of your relationship?
Not really. We only did the 'next step' once we both were ready. Age had no factor in it.

nickchick

How did you meet your SO?

FI likes to say "at a bar". I say through mutual friends. (aug 26, 2005)

My best friend was dating this guy and was meeting up with him at a bar one night. He was supposed to be bringing one of his friend and she was bringing one of our friends. My other friend and i ended up being bored that night and invited ourselves. So it was us 4 girls and the 2 guys. The bar was so not my vibe but when i saw my friend's date's friend i thought at least the night wasn't a total loss. lol I purposely sat next to him and tried to talk to him but he was shy. A few days later i asked my best friend, sooo, what's up with his friend. She said he asked about me but didn't think i was interested so she didn't say anything. I told her i was interested.

 

How long was it between meeting and first date?

not totally sure if you could call this a "date" but sunday of labor day weekend...so sept some time. My best friend got a call from the guy she was dating that they were BBQing over my now Fi's place. So we went over there to hang out. Well, she ended up leaving me there with him, drunk and dancing in the living room, to go to the guy she'd been dating's place. (yikes!) FI was a perfect gentleman, offered to take the couch and let me take his bed, but i chose the couch and he slept on the floor next to me. 

How long was it between first date and exclusivity?

We never had the "exclusive talk", but the first time he told me he loved me was in Rosarito Mexico on Aug 5th the following year.

(aug 5, 2006)

 
How long between exclusivity and moving in together?  (If applicable) 
We started living together in Oct 07. We lived together for almost 2 years before i decided i wanted to live separately until we were married or engaged. So we've been living apart since last sept.

 

How long between exclusivity and engagement?

almost 4 years. We just got engaged on june 12th. it was 4 years and 10 months from when we met. 

How long between engagement and marriage?

We haven't set a date yet but we're going to wait a year at least to save.

How long between marriage and BABY MAKING?  (This one's just for me - or you can put in your estimated timeline)

I'm thinking the TTCing will begin right after we're married if we have a home by then. 

Do you think your age made a difference in your timelines?  Do you think that the age at which you meet affects the timeline of your relationship? 

For sure! We both had secure jobs and were living independently when we met. I also feel like i had already done plenty of partying and girl trips and all that by the time we met. I'm so thankful for that time in my life but now i'm so ready to be his wife. 

lodonnell616

How did you meet your SO?
In Munich, at Oktoberfest...I was in Munich visiting a friend.

How long was it between meeting and first date?
I went back to Dublin where I was living at the time, and he texted asking for some pics from the weekend (I thought I'd never see him again).  We continued to e-mail every day while I was in the process of moving to Frankfurt, and he came up for the weekend 2 weeks after I moved.

How long was it between first date and exclusivity?
Not really sure.  Not that long.

How long between exclusivity and moving in together?  (If applicable)
I had a contract for 10 months in Frankfurt.  After 3, we decided to move in together in Munich--I just needed to get transferred down there.  So I guess just about 10 months in total.

How long between exclusivity and engagement?
N/A at the moment, but latest discussions will put us at about the 5.5 year mark when it happens

How long between engagement and marriage?
N/A not sure how long we'd be engaged...really depends on what type/size of wedding and where in the world we decide to get married...

How long between marriage and BABY MAKING?  (This one's just for me - or you can put in your estimated timeline)
N/A Would like to be married a few years and definitely to own a house by the time we get there.


Do you think your age made a difference in your timelines?  Do you think that the age at which you meet affects the timeline of your relationship?
I think more his, than mine.  He always said he didn't picture getting married before he was 30 (he just turned 30 in March), and I have pictured marrying him, so we've just been going with the flow on that one.  As for age when meeting, not sure it does.

Hazel_B

How did you meet your SO? Lavalife

How long was it between meeting and first date? We met online and went out for a coffee date 2 or 3 days later.

How long was it between first date and exclusivity? About 2 weeks,

How long between exclusivity and moving in together?  (If applicable) 1 yearm 4 months

How long between exclusivity and engagement? n/a

How long between engagement and marriage? n/a

How long between marriage and BABY MAKING?  (This one's just for me - or you can put in your estimated timeline) We have a not very precise timeline of getting married within 5 years. Mainly cause we made a compromise on the house, he wants a nice garage and I said okay but I'd like to get married first before making major renos to the property and he said okay. He has given a 5 years timeline to the garage project.  Based on our ages at that point, babies are going to be an ASAP thing.


Do you think your age made a difference in your timelines?  Do you think that the age at which you meet affects the timeline of your relationship?

If we had met younger I don't think we'd be together. BF has openly said that he wouldn't have appreciated someone like me if we'd met in his early to mid 20s.  Our ages has affected too much, finances have had more of an affect. The only thing that age is affecting is the babymaking.

[Deleted User]

How did you meet your SO?
We met working for the Census Bureau (I was one of the lucky ones that got to work for a year and a half & he worked for them a month or two at a time, when he was needed, as his 2nd job).  We started flirting almost immediately, but neither of us would do anything about it (he was married several years ago and it ended horribly - she cheated & claimed the kid was his, paternity test proved otherwise - so he was overly cautious and I was just very shy).  About a month and a half after he started working in the office the second time, one of our co-workers picked up on the flirting and decided to talk to us individually to make sure there was something there and wasn't just innocent flirting - we exchanged phone numbers the day after she talked to us.

How long was it between meeting and first date?
We talked on the phone for about 2 hours every night, plus saw each other at the office, but due to his "main" job's schedule, it was about 2 weeks after our first phone call before our first date.

How long was it between first date and exclusivity?
We were exclusive by the end of our first date; he actually made the comment "what are the kids calling it now-a-days? going steady?" (I'll be 36 this month and he is 41).

How long between exclusivity and moving in together?  (If applicable)
We are both very religious and made the mutual decision, right from the start, that we would not live together before we are married.

How long between exclusivity and engagement?
No engagement yet - we have been talking a lot about getting married lately.  We've actually talked about getting married from the start - we both went into this relationship knowing the outcome would be marriage.

How long between engagement and marriage?
We've talked that we will probably not have more than a 6-month engagement - although he's joked that he's ok with the drive-thru chapel (we live in Vegas), he's also commented that since this will be my first (and ONLY marriage), he wants me to have the wedding of my dreams (and since I'm "old", my parents have got a nice wedding fund saved up by now)

How long between marriage and BABY MAKING?  (This one's just for me - or you can put in your estimated timeline)
We would like a honeymoon baby, but we're also realistic...if we don't have health insurance (at least for me) by the time we get married, we'll wait until we can get insurance first.

Do you think your age made a difference in your timelines?  Do you think that the age at which you meet affects the timeline of your relationship? Not just age, but maturity played a big difference.  We are "older" and have had a chance to live our lives and know what we want out of life - we don't want to play games.  When I was in my early 20's, I couldn't even imagine talking about getting engaged before we'd been dating for a year, but that's what we're doing and it's what's right for us.  Most people who know us thought we would be engaged at 3 months - although I would have said yes, I'm glad we didn't get engaged at 3 months. 

I have a cousin who lived with her BF for 4 years before they got engaged and were engaged for 3 years before they got married...their divorce was final before their first wedding anniversary.  As I've heard many wise women say on this board, there is no template for a perfect relationship.  If it's right for you, then that's all that matters.  And as my BF says...there is no "perfect man/woman", there's only the "perfect one for me".