My Craptastic Day So Far...

bethsmiles

Be warned this post is whiny - I do need advice though so if you want you can just skip to the end where I stop whining

1. It is snowing today

2. Work was crazy! We have kids from 6 months to 10 and the babies were not happy today. It was 3 hours of non-stop screaming and crying. All baby-fever symptoms GONE!

3. I get into my car after work and close the door then hear my back windshield shatter. It is completely gone. So I had to take it to get fixed which is going to take them till Friday and cost me $350. I have no idea what happened. There weren't even any cracks in that windshield.

Ok, now that I'm done whining I need advice. BF has seemed really miserable lately. He hates his job (but we've both decided he shouldn't quit until has a new one lined up), he hates living at home (he could move out and we are going back and forth about it. He has the money to leave but he could save more if he stays there and it's only for like another year and a half), and he is having a lot of trouble focusing in school and isn't enjoying it at all this semester. We are also both frustrated with the semi-long distance because we are so used to seeing each other every day and I think he really liked that he could just hang out at my place to escape spending so much time at his parent's house. I just don't know how to help him through all of this. Any advice?

mymissingpuzzlepiece

The only thing I can think of is to be a strong support system. It's hard because there really isn't much you can do, except be there for him. I think you could definitely help him find a better job so that at least he can be happy at a job he likes. 

Did you two used to live together?

bethsmiles

No we never lived together but I used to live really close to him then I moved about an hour and a half away so now we only see each other on weekends.

He is supposed to go talk to the internship center at his school next week because we are hoping he could get a paid internship. They are harder to get but he is at the top of his class and with his experience at the state job he has right now hopefully he has a better chance.

ravenray

*hugs* I am sorry you are having a bad day Beth!
The only thing I can think of is just being there for him.  I know what it is like being in a place where you don't want to be.  Does he ever stay over on weekends? Or is that too tempting?  Talk to him often so he doesn't feel alone.  Encourage him to look for other jobs.  IDK I am not good with this kind of stuff but I hope it gets better!

bethsmiles

He is planning on staying the night this weekend, which will be nice. I'm really excited for this weekend

I guess it's just something he has to work through...I just don't like not being able to really help.

ravenray

I totally understand that.  *hugs*  You are a great GF.

peekaboo2011

Beth, all I have is hugs for you at this point.

And wine.  I offer wine and a KUI thread when I get home tonight.

bethsmiles

I think both of us are just ready to be past this phase of our lives and be done with school.

desertsun

When I have to do things I don't want to, I find it helpful to set up a system of to dos and rewards.

I make a to-do list every day, and prioritize it, and promise that if I get the top 2 things done, then I get a treat.

I also think that sometimes, being miserable is not worth saving extra money. Life is too short. And if it means being a little less miserable, and therefore better able to attend to other responsibilities, then sometimes spending a little more money can be worthwhile.

I would say sit down with him and talk about different ideas and come up with a plan.

Everyone always feels better when they have a plan.

I'm really sorry about your windshield, Beth. That sucks.

GL and keep us updated!

bethsmiles

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_my-craptastic-day-so-far?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:b01ce41b-61f8-4d7a-98d5-90e1fd33154bPost:130ed08b-2ae7-4808-bc01-8ae2d0549737">Re: My Craptastic Day So Far...</a>:
[QUOTE]When I have to do things I don't want to, I find it helpful to set up a system of to dos and rewards. I make a to-do list every day, and prioritize it, and promise that if I get the top 2 things done, then I get a treat.<strong> I also think that sometimes, being miserable is not worth saving extra money. Life is too short. And if it means being a little less miserable, and therefore better able to attend to other responsibilities, then sometimes spending a little more money can be worthwhile.</strong> I would say sit down with him and talk about different ideas and come up with a plan. Everyone always feels better when they have a plan. I'm really sorry about your windshield, Beth. That sucks. GL and keep us updated!
Posted by desertsun[/QUOTE]

This makes a lot of sense to me. There really aren't any reasons (besides saving money) for him to live at home. I think we will talk about it more this weekend when he is here.