Thesis

miamary

So this is going to sound completely ridicolous to anyone who's been through grad school, I guess, but- I have to finish my thesis until 11-25. About 70 pages to go. Do you think that's possible? I do not work full time or part time, I work freelance, so pretty much when I want to I work and when I don't want to I don't. 

I have some problems with procrastination *sigh* and I have always had issues with school work as in "I won't do this just because others want me to". It's completely childish, I know that, it's all about control, due to my chaotic childhood I always have to have the feeling I'm in control. Sometimes you have to suck it up and just do it, it's not all that easy for me though. 

Also, my parents take complete credit for everything I have ever accomplished, which makes it even harder to want to accomplish anything. School is such a PITA for me, so I want to be done finally!! To be done, I need to finish the thesis, obviously. 

On another board, I head about the "pomodoro technique"- 25 min writing, no distractions- 5 min break- repeat 4 times- take a big break- repeat 4 times. It works pretty well once I get myself to start. 

I'm going to therapy to deal with all my issues but no miracles are going to happen within the next 4 weeks, so, any other advice??

Thanks!

becunning2

Yes.  Quit procrastinating and sit down and write. I also think you'll be lucky as fruitcake to write 70 pages in a month.  O.o  I have friends who have been diligently working on their dissertations and NOT procrastinating, and I don't think they could finish in that time period.  If you're going to do it, get cracking.

paintgirl

I'm a fast writer so I could do that with no problem. If you're a slow writer, well you're screwed.

Here's a technique for you - the No TK technique - log out of The Knot and stay that way until you're done. Same with Facebook or any other time sucks you have. If you're at the computer, you're working.

I agree with the concept of the tomato technique you mention above but I don't think 25 minutes is long enough to be productive. I work from home and typically schedule 50-60 minute increments of work, followed by a 5-10 minute break (I usually do housework then).

70 pages, just under 30 days - that's about 2 and 1/2 pages a day. If you want to leave a few days for editing, then write 4 pages a day for 20 days and edit the rest of the time. Your work isn't finished for the day until you have 4 solid pages.

PS The bit about your parents is just an excuse for not working on this. Who gives a sh*t who takes credit for your work? First, why do you let them? Second, why do you care? Self-worth is only determined by... well, YOU. So get to work. Write something you are proud of. And then be proud of yourself for finishing it. And screw them.

becunning2

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_thesis?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:ce259f8c-1ab8-4cf4-9fb1-ea9f920c559cPost:ae7e05d1-dcfe-4665-8502-15834b6cd19c">Re: Thesis</a>:
[QUOTE]0 pages, just under 30 days - that's about 2 and 1/2 pages a day. If you want to leave a few days for editing, then write 4 pages a day for 20 days and edit the rest of the time. Your work isn't finished for the day until you have 4 solid pages.
Posted by paintgirl[/QUOTE]

<div>That's assuming all the research has been done!</div>

peekaboo2011

1. Stop making excuses.  I don't care who "takes credit", your parents aren't writing your thesis, and they didn't sign you up for grad school.  You went in to that on your own.

2. Turn off the internet distractions.

3. Get you some good ambient music.  I'm particularly fond of Brian Eno's "Music for Airports" when I need to be productive.  Or, you can download Ommwriter for free, and that includes ambient music on a writing platform designed to help you focus.

4. Tell your BF you love him and you'll see him when you're done.

5. Write for 60-90 minutes.  Take 10 minute breaks AFTER your session, eat, take a quick walk/jog.  Sit your butt back down and keep going.  Give yourself a page requirement for the day.  Based on your timeframe, 4-6 pages, depending on how much you have done already and how fast you can write.

We'll see you next month.

miamary

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_thesis?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:ce259f8c-1ab8-4cf4-9fb1-ea9f920c559cPost:d81459c3-f196-40ae-bc7d-5f81224d05fd">Re: Thesis</a>:
[QUOTE]You really need to learn what accountability is.   (Here's a link.) I'm a terrible procrastinator, and I have been extremely overwhelmed lately.  (I work full time and I'm in grad school taking 3 classes this semester.)  I haven't been dealing with it the way I'd like.  But do you know who I'm blaming for that?  MYSELF.  And you know who is going to do something about it to get back on track with school and work?  ME.   EVERYONE has something negative from their past, but people who are successful and happy in life don't try to blame all of their problems on it.  We learn how to deal with it and move on.  In this post you're blaming your parents for the fact that you procrastinate (WTF) and in your previous post, you blamed them for your shopping addiction (again, WTF).  Where do YOU come into play in this?  You're 27.  I think it's time for you to act like an adult.   Follow the PP instructions for how to get your thesis written.  I will be turning off TK and facebook today at work so I can get everything finished that I need to.  You should do the same.
Posted by yaga13[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>Well, actually I worked through it with my therapist and finally understood where this is coming from. It's my responsibility to deal with it now, and work on myself, but it's not my fault it turned out to be this way in the first place.  Believe me, it took me a while to accept this. And yes, I do blame a lot of my problems on them. Because it actually is their fault. </div><div>
</div><div>Actually, a lot of people having gone through what I have gone through (including sexual and emotional abuse) don't even manage to finish high school, so please don't tell me there are many successful people out there. True everyone has some negativity from there past, but I don't think everyone has lived through an abusive childhood. Sorry to be so outspoken about this, but don't judge people when you haven't been in their shoes. </div><div>
</div><div>Everyone is right about turning off Fb, TK and the internet in itself though. Actually I downloaded a program for this called freedom which I am using already. I just thought people may have other useful suggestions too. Fresh air was a really good one. Also I think I might push back the date 2 to 4 weeks if they let me (has to be applied for, but will usually be accepted). I've seriously been dealing with a lot lately, so I thought I might get some helpful advice from people who just know how to study. </div><div>
</div><div>Btw- I live with my bf, so I will see him anyway. </div><div>Oh- music for airports- not available in my country:(

</div>

ravenray

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_thesis?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:ce259f8c-1ab8-4cf4-9fb1-ea9f920c559cPost:dd9157e9-38a9-4309-8ae2-83da3ac230ba">Re: Thesis</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Thesis : Well, actually I worked through it with my therapist and finally understood where this is coming from. It's my responsibility to deal with it now, and work on myself, but it's not my fault it turned out to be this way in the first place.  Believe me, it took me a while to accept this. And yes, I do blame a lot of my problems on them. Because it actually is their fault. <strong> Actually, a lot of people having gone through what I have gone through (including sexual and emotional abuse) don't even manage to finish high school, so please don't tell me there are many successful people out there. True everyone has some negativity from there past, but I don't think everyone has lived through an abusive childhood. Sorry to be so outspoken about this, but don't judge people when you haven't been in their shoes. </strong> Everyone is right about turning off Fb, TK and the internet in itself though. Actually I downloaded a program for this called freedom which I am using already. I just thought people may have other useful suggestions too. Fresh air was a really good one. Also I think I might push back the date 2 to 4 weeks if they let me (has to be applied for, but will usually be accepted). I've seriously been dealing with a lot lately, so I thought I might get some helpful advice from people who just know how to study.  Btw- I live with my bf, so I will see him anyway.  Oh- music for airports- not available in my country:(
Posted by miamary[/QUOTE]
<p class="MsoNormal">Be careful.  My Fi had an abusive childhood yet he is one of the most hard working and successful people for his age that I know.   I also have been abused and I would say that I am pretty successful as well.  I think what she is trying to say is don't use your past as an excuse to fail, and she is totally right.  You can't let all the bad, horrible things in your past keep you down.  You have to rise above them, try not to think about them too much and take responsibility for your own mistakes and faults. 

As for procrastinating, reward yourself.  I am going to write 4 pages then I can play on TK for 20 mins or whatever.  The others have given good advice as well.<span>  </span></p>

peekaboo2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_thesis?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:ce259f8c-1ab8-4cf4-9fb1-ea9f920c559cPost:dd9157e9-38a9-4309-8ae2-83da3ac230ba">Re: Thesis</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Thesis : Well, actually I worked through it with my therapist and finally understood where this is coming from. It's my responsibility to deal with it now, and work on myself, but it's not my fault it turned out to be this way in the first place.  Believe me, it took me a while to accept this. And yes, I do blame a lot of my problems on them. Because it actually is their fault.  Actually, a lot of people having gone through what I have gone through (including sexual and emotional abuse) don't even manage to finish high school, so please don't tell me there are many successful people out there. True everyone has some negativity from there past, but I don't think everyone has lived through an abusive childhood. Sorry to be so outspoken about this, but don't judge people when you haven't been in their shoes.  Everyone is right about turning off Fb, TK and the internet in itself though. Actually I downloaded a program for this called freedom which I am using already. I just thought people may have other useful suggestions too. Fresh air was a really good one. Also I think I might push back the date 2 to 4 weeks if they let me (has to be applied for, but will usually be accepted). I've seriously been dealing with a lot lately, so I thought I might get some helpful advice from people who just know how to study.  Btw- I live with my bf, so I will see him anyway.  Oh- music for airports- not available in my country:(
Posted by miamary[/QUOTE]

For every person that couldn't make it through the abuse, I'll show you 5 that did.  Seriously, do not even start that.  I'm sorry that you went through bad stuff as a kid, but you know what, you're a hell of a lot stronger for it.  And your...unwillingness to see that kind of bugs me.

You are responsible for the choices you make and the consequences that come with those choices.  You chose to have a deadline, and you chose to procrastinate.  Own it.

oceana919

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_thesis?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:ce259f8c-1ab8-4cf4-9fb1-ea9f920c559cPost:dd9157e9-38a9-4309-8ae2-83da3ac230ba">Re: Thesis</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Thesis : Well, actually I worked through it with my therapist and finally understood where this is coming from. It's my responsibility to deal with it now, and work on myself, but it's not my fault it turned out to be this way in the first place.  Believe me, it took me a while to accept this. And yes, I do blame a lot of my problems on them. Because it actually is their fault. <strong> Actually, a lot of people having gone through what I have gone through (including sexual and emotional abuse) don't even manage to finish high school, so please don't tell me there are many successful people out there. True everyone has some negativity from there past, but I don't think everyone has lived through an abusive childhood. Sorry to be so outspoken about this, but don't judge people when you haven't been in their shoes.</strong>  Everyone is right about turning off Fb, TK and the internet in itself though. Actually I downloaded a program for this called freedom which I am using already. I just thought people may have other useful suggestions too. Fresh air was a really good one. Also I think I might push back the date 2 to 4 weeks if they let me (has to be applied for, but will usually be accepted). I've seriously been dealing with a lot lately, so I thought I might get some helpful advice from people who just know how to study.  Btw- I live with my bf, so I will see him anyway.  Oh- music for airports- not available in my country:(
Posted by miamary[/QUOTE]

I would back that cart right on up, if I were you.

First, everyone, and I do mean <em>everyone</em>, has hardships in their lives that they either overcome and learn from, or they allow to become an excuse for their later failings. Yes, not everyone has abuse in their past, but that doesn't mean what has happened to them is any more or less difficult, or any more/less horrible, than your particular situation. And, frankly, that makes your successes and failures no more great than anyone else around here.

Second, there are likely women on this board that <em>have</em> gone through similar situations as you, and they are successful, functional members of society. So, your generalization is just as bad as the one you are accusing other posters of making.

Third, no one, regardless of how similar their situation may be to yours, can walk in <em>your</em> shoes. Only you can. In the same way that only <em>you</em> are responsible for how you handle the things that happen in your life and what you make of yourself as a direct result. You are the only person who has experienced what you, as an individual, has experienced. You can have two people experience the exact same thing and have the outcome be completely different, based on their character, their personality, their maturity (both intellectually and emotionally), other mitigating factors. No offense to you, but that phrase just pisses me off, because, frankly, it makes no sense.

You have two options - either turn off the distractions, sit down, and write your damn thesis, or don't. That's it. In the end, no one but you is responsible for whether you pass or fail, complete or don't complete. Considering how much time you've spent on TK in the last few days, you've got plenty of time to write what you need to write.

hetshup

When I was in college, I cranked out a 68 page space and half page paper in 21 days. It was my keystone project, and I was carrying a full load of classes, was an NCAA athlete and worked part time. Oh and I was with (now) H.

You need to stop looking at the whole elephant, break it down into bite size chunks and eat those. 

Everyone has a reason why they CAN'T do something. So stop talking about why you can't and start doing something. 

Oh, and disconnect the internet while you are writing.  

callalily13

This is insane....Depending on what your thesis is about it is possible. I am in grad school for clinical psychology so my thesis entails heavy statistics. If you do not have that to do it is possible, but you will need to work your ass off to get it done at all, let alone do it well. START WORKING NOW.

TheMutleys

Excuses are like a$$holes.  Everyone has them. 

Oh wait, that's NOT how it goes.  




Stop making excuses.  Get OFF the internet.  Write your paper. 

It is really, truly that simple. 

Swazzle

I don't appreciate your generalization & would like for you to just go away now.

Please & thank you.

oceana919

Oh, and in case you were wondering, it is possible to write that much in that time span. I wrote a 200pg masters of science thesis in five weeks. During that time period, I worked full time, successfully defended said thesis (we were permitted to defend when our thesis paper was at 90% complete), and buried my grandmother. I was also sick as a dog and going through cancer testing.

How did I do it? I turned everything off, told people (with the exceptions of emergencies) to leave me the hell alone, and I cranked through it. And when everything was said and done, I had a GIANT margarita.

peekaboo2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_thesis?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:ce259f8c-1ab8-4cf4-9fb1-ea9f920c559cPost:cf2aec00-29b3-45bb-8f0a-d0e79e74181b">Re: Thesis</a>:
[QUOTE]Oh, and in case you were wondering, it is possible to write that much in that time span. I wrote a 200pg masters of science thesis in five weeks. During that time period, I worked full time, successfully defended said thesis (we were permitted to defend when our thesis paper was at 90% complete), and buried my grandmother. I was also sick as a dog and going through cancer testing. How did I do it? I turned everything off, told people (with the exceptions of emergencies) to leave me the hell alone, and I cranked through it. And when everything was said and done, I had a GIANT margarita.
Posted by oceana919[/QUOTE]


This is why I <3 you and am going to demand that we hang out when I move down there in Jan.

oceana919

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_thesis?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:ce259f8c-1ab8-4cf4-9fb1-ea9f920c559cPost:cd853cf7-28bf-4b61-9415-8529a6f7f948">Re: Thesis</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Thesis : This is why I <3 you and am going to demand that we hang out when I move down there in Jan.
Posted by peekaboo2011[/QUOTE]

LOL, that's definitely doable.

oceana919

Yep, I chugged that. I chugged two of them after defending my Ph.D. dissertation proposal.

ravenray

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_thesis?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:ce259f8c-1ab8-4cf4-9fb1-ea9f920c559cPost:d061d0e1-9b58-4935-a29a-0c3532d22b17">Re: Thesis</a>:
[QUOTE]Yep, I chugged that. I chugged two of them after defending my Ph.D. dissertation proposal.
Posted by oceana919[/QUOTE]
Bad ass....  I think you are my new inspiration!  <3  *starstruck*

oceana919

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_thesis?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:ce259f8c-1ab8-4cf4-9fb1-ea9f920c559cPost:0b5ce550-4c43-43f6-8fc7-a6ddb3d1946d">Re: Thesis</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Thesis : Bad ass....  I think you are my new inspiration!  <3  *starstruck*
Posted by ravenray[/QUOTE]

Peek can probably validate this...but you have maintain a minimum blood alcohol content in order to be considered a marine biologist.

hetshup

Mmmmm limey goodness

oceana919

Congratulations, OP...your thread has officially been pirated by margaritas.




So, on the topic of margaritas...these look rather nom-ilicious...




Blood Orange Margaritas (LINK)




Meyer Lemon Margaritas (LINK)




Black Cherry Margaritas (LINK)




Kiwi Margarita (LINK)

notquiteblushing

Mmm margarita.

What's your thesis on?  I could use some extra cash.

oceana919

Ohhhhhh NOM NOM NOM...




Margarita Popsicles (LINK)




Margarita Cheesecake (LINK)




Margarita Brownies (LINK)




Margarita Ice Cream Sandwiches (LINK)

peekaboo2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_thesis?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:ce259f8c-1ab8-4cf4-9fb1-ea9f920c559cPost:4495b3be-cceb-413c-bdeb-b4205efc6c06">Re: Thesis</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Thesis : Peek can probably validate this...but you have maintain a minimum blood alcohol content in order to be considered a marine biologist.
Posted by oceana919[/QUOTE]

If the last meeting is any sort of precedent-setting event, my liver is going to take a beating if I get into grad school.  I'd never been so hungover in my life.  Oof.

oceana919

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_thesis?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:ce259f8c-1ab8-4cf4-9fb1-ea9f920c559cPost:b24e6cd8-f81b-4129-ad5a-2e851517ca86">Re: Thesis</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Thesis : If the last meeting is any sort of precedent-setting event, my liver is going to take a beating if I get into grad school.  I'd never been so hungover in my life.  Oof.
Posted by peekaboo2011[/QUOTE]

Here. Have a margarita.


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Or twelve.

peekaboo2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_thesis?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:ce259f8c-1ab8-4cf4-9fb1-ea9f920c559cPost:32885579-214a-4cc9-80d1-98a9171e5dbf">Re: Thesis</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Thesis : Here. Have a margarita. Or twelve.
Posted by oceana919[/QUOTE]

Vodka cranberry.

Tequila and I don't get along at all.  The stuff makes me vom.  Instantly.

oceana919

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_thesis?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:ce259f8c-1ab8-4cf4-9fb1-ea9f920c559cPost:f0c1229b-f500-4164-a6da-4451d9b0f8c2">Re: Thesis</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Thesis : Vodka cranberry. Tequila and I don't get along at all.  The stuff makes me vom.  Instantly.
Posted by peekaboo2011[/QUOTE]

You are so screwed as a shark biologist...LOL

peekaboo2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_thesis?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:ce259f8c-1ab8-4cf4-9fb1-ea9f920c559cPost:c5dcc1d8-4a45-4948-b9f5-8a8ff0dbc656">Re: Thesis</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Thesis : You are so screwed as a shark biologist...LOL
Posted by oceana919[/QUOTE]

I like gin.  And vodka.  Doesn't that count for anything?  :(

oceana919

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_thesis?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:ce259f8c-1ab8-4cf4-9fb1-ea9f920c559cPost:0ec46468-4fd4-4bf3-b141-2f328b219101">Re: Thesis</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Thesis : I like gin.  And vodka.  Doesn't that count for anything?  :(
Posted by peekaboo2011[/QUOTE]

Absolutely. But I have found that sharkies like their tequila. LOL

peekaboo2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_thesis?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:ce259f8c-1ab8-4cf4-9fb1-ea9f920c559cPost:fde0c538-81a2-4abf-81b5-55a50b5cb8f6">Re: Thesis</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Thesis : Absolutely. But I have found that sharkies like their tequila. LOL
Posted by oceana919[/QUOTE]

You know, Ryan mentioned this to me recently.  Well, I suppose my stomach and my tastebuds should get reacquainted with the stuff.  *shudder*

hetshup

Peek- I don't know if we can be friends. You need to like tequila. It's important. SO IMPORTANT. 

Oceana- I had a habenero margarita at Dworld. CAn we have another in Feb. Awesome.