Engagement Etiquette - Help

lcsa99

Hi everyone.

Okay, here is a bit of drama. My mother is getting married for the fourth time in August and as my BF and I have been talking about it for a while, I am sure we are going to get engaged ourselves soon. What is the appropriate thing to do? Should I tell my guy that if he is thinking about it he should wait until after her wedding? Should I let him do it when he wants and not tell her until after her wedding? She is my mother so traditionally she would be one of the first to know but I don't want to take away from her day.

**Mutley**

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_engagement-etiquette?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:d08d1329-635d-4cc6-aa54-b26cca601cb9Post:f92cb439-14f7-4efe-9ef5-0c7b0a71c9aa">Engagement Etiquette - Help</a>:
[QUOTE]Hi everyone. Okay, here is a bit of drama. My mother is getting married for the fourth time in August and as my BF and I have been talking about it for a while, I am sure we are going to get engaged ourselves soon. What is the appropriate thing to do? Should I tell my guy that if he is thinking about it he should wait until after her wedding? Should I let him do it when he wants and not tell her until after her wedding? She is my mother so traditionally she would be one of the first to know but I don't want to take away from her day.
Posted by lcsa99[/QUOTE]

Let the proposal happens when it happens and tell your mom then.  If she is anything but ecstatic for you, then that is on her.

You cannot take away from 'her day' by getting engaged.  The world does not go on hold when someone gets engaged.  Lots of people can be engaged at the same time.  I promise.

P.S. Why did you join over 8 years ago? 

katanne9

Not sure what the drama is. As long as he's not proposing AT your mom's wedding, any time is fine.

Don't bother dictating it; just let it happen.

jeanacorina

I have pretty much the same advice as PPs.

Your mom gets one day. That's it. You won't be stealing her thunder at all. And is there even any thunder left for the FOURTH marriage? I dunno.

desertsun

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_engagement-etiquette?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:d08d1329-635d-4cc6-aa54-b26cca601cb9Post:59260bcf-e087-4ca1-8aad-6388e4a5acc6">Re: Engagement Etiquette - Help</a>:
[QUOTE] And is there even any thunder left for the FOURTH marriage? I dunno.
Posted by jeanacorina[/QUOTE]

Good point!

oceana919

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_engagement-etiquette?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:d08d1329-635d-4cc6-aa54-b26cca601cb9Post:00d655e7-2273-4f20-ae81-eaa969c52faa">Re: Engagement Etiquette - Help</a>:
[QUOTE]P.S. Why did you join over 8 years ago? 
Posted by **Mutley**[/QUOTE]

Whoa, good point.

lcsa99

I joined 8 yrs ago to help find ideas for a friends wedding.

Thanks for the tips everyone.