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What would you do if...

Scenario A) Your BFF (MOH)'s BF FB messaged you at 10:30 at night asking if you were still with BFF. You haven't talked to BFF that day and haven't seen her since Saturday. What do you do?

Scenario B) You love your job, so very very much. Everything about it is perfect, but the pay is hell and there will never be any benefits. Job A gets brought to your attention, you have the right connections to get the job, and the salary packing is amazing and comes with full benefits. You'd be great at this job, but it might be a little too demanding and you would have to leave the job you love right away if offered. 

Job B gets brought to your attention the day after 1st interview at Job A. Job B is even more perfect as far as location, more involved in the community, doing cool things, and an interacial student base, which is something you love. Salary package is comprable to Job A. Job B will be available in the fall, much better timing. However, they won't start the hiring process for another couple of months, by which time you might have already had the offer from Job A. You're also highly connected to Job B and are being recommended as the best choice by the current person in the position. 

What do you do? 
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"You're our early 20's BSC scarecrow. They cower at your maturity." - lennonkdc Anniversary

Re: What would you do if...

  • Scenario A, I would have an honest but casual conversation with BFF. "Hey, so your BF texted me last night looking for you." I wouldn't judge or demand an explanation, but just let her know that no matter what, you're there for her. Who knows what she's going through, why she's out and lying to him about where she's going/where she's been.

    Scenario B: I would probably wait it out for Job B. So long as you can hang on till then.  
    "Stuart was scared, but he loved Margalo, Mommy. And there is nothing bigger than love." -The Bean
     "His farts smell like Satan's asshole mixed with a skunk's vagina. But it's okay, because I love him." -CSousa









  • SwazzleSwazzle New Jersey member
    10000 Comments Seventh Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    Scenario A) I wouldn't respond to the message and I'd immediately get in touch with BFF to find out WTF is going on. 

    Scenario B) I would go with job B because it sounds like it'd make me happier, is closer to home and has similar pay and benefits. It also sounds like I have a really good chance of getting the job and I'd be able to stay at my current job a little longer and help find a replacement or phase myself out vs quitting tomorrow. 



  • A) I would text/call BFF and ask if she is okay and let her know that her BF messaged me and asked if we were together.

    B) Wait out job B. It sounds like a great opportunity and would be worth waiting for if possible to do so.
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  • A) Not sure what I would do in that scenario I may not respond to the text or say anything.  I wouldn't want to get in the middle of anything.

    B) I would wait it out for Job B for many of the reasons other mentioned

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  • edited January 2013
    Scenario A) Your BFF (MOH)'s BF FB messaged you at 10:30 at night asking if you were still with BFF. You haven't talked to BFF that day and haven't seen her since Saturday. What do you do?
    I would tell him that I haven't heard from her today. If he was concerned for some reason I'd offer to call some other mutual friends...but otherwise i'd assume he'd just gotten home and assumed she was with me. (I guess I just wouldn't assume that she was sneaking around or anything...and I'd be more worried about playing along if in fact she'd been nabbed or something)

    Scenario B) You love your job, so very very much. Everything about it is perfect, but the pay is hell and there will never be any benefits. Job A gets brought to your attention, you have the right connections to get the job, and the salary packing is amazing and comes with full benefits. You'd be great at this job, but it might be a little too demanding and you would have to leave the job you love right away if offered.  Job B gets brought to your attention the day after 1st interview at Job A. Job B is even more perfect as far as location, more involved in the community, doing cool things, and an interacial student base, which is something you love. Salary package is comprable to Job A. Job B will be available in the fall, much better timing. However, they won't start the hiring process for another couple of months, by which time you might have already had the offer from Job A. You're also highly connected to Job B and are being recommended as the best choice by the current person in the position.  What do you do? 
    If I could afford to, i'd probably wait for Job B. It sounds like i'm not that interested in Job A except for the money. If money was an issue, i'd take Job A, but keep my name in the mix for Job B. There's no reason I couldn't leave the other job if the 2nd one worked out in a month or two.
  • A)  I might text him back but I would get a hold on your BFF first.  Find out what is going on or what she thinks he wants.

    B)I would wait for job B.  Unless you really really need the money right now, in your job I would go where it makes you happy :)

     

    "Love is not affectionate feeling, but a steady wish for the loved person's ultimate good as far as it can be obtained"-C.S. Lewis

    Married! May 27th, 2012

  • A) I called BFF immediately and she was drunk as a skunk and I didn't ask where she was. She asked me to tell him that we were drinking wine and that she was staying over at my place. I relayed the information and he told me "you should slap her" for ignoring him. It was via fb, so no idea if it was joking or not. Her and I are meeting for drinks tonight when she says she's going to tell me what happened. My mind is going bananas. 

    B) Wow, y'all are amazing!! You're really helping me see this clearer. I'm just worried that I'll get offered Job A, decline (screwing over the students and families at that church), and then not get offered Job B. Which wouldn't be bad, because I would still be able to be at my current church which I am in love with. And maybe I can use Job A and B as leverage to ask for a minimal raise. Although, it would never happen, but we could see. 

    I like what Rach said about being able to find someone to take my place when I leave. That's what's got me most nervous about Job A. But it was such a great opportunity when it came up a few days ago. It just blows my mind that Job B came up right when I was stressing about Job A. 
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    "You're our early 20's BSC scarecrow. They cower at your maturity." - lennonkdc Anniversary
  • 1. Talk to BFF, see what's up.  But maybe also tell BF that I haven't spoken to her because if something was wrong, and it wasn't like she was off being shady, I wouldn't want to seem like I'm hiding something or holding back information.

    2. I'd go with A, but keep job B option open.  Things could change in a few months (losing funding, changing a full time job into a couple part time positions, etc.) so I'd go with A for the experience and money reasons.
  • Hummingbird125Hummingbird125 New York member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary Name Dropper
    I agree with most of the PP. For scenario A I probably would have ingored the text, but I would have gotten in touch with BFF ASAP. Please tell us what actually happened when you do get to talk to her! I'm so nosey, and if I were in your shoes I would be flipping out right now.

    For scenario B, I would wait it out for job B. You don't sound ready to leave right now for job A, and it doesn't sound like you're really excited about the position either.
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  • Scenario A) Your BFF (MOH)'s BF FB messaged you at 10:30 at night asking if you were still with BFF. You haven't talked to BFF that day and haven't seen her since Saturday. What do you do?
    I would text or call BFF right away and let her know that her bf sent me a message looking for her.
    This has actually happened to me several times.

    Scenario B) You love your job, so very very much. Everything about it is perfect, but the pay is hell and there will never be any benefits. Job A gets brought to your attention, you have the right connections to get the job, and the salary packing is amazing and comes with full benefits. You'd be great at this job, but it might be a little too demanding and you would have to leave the job you love right away if offered.
    I'd see if I could get a pay raise or benefits at the job I loved. Then, it would depend on whether or not the pay and full benefits were worth the demanding hours and th fact that I could potentially hate my job.
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