Telling My Dad

Madison Speers

Ahh! I'm meeting with my dad tonight, we're just going for coffee... The thing is, I'm not super close to my dad, our relationship has been crumbled so many times, and just now I'm trying to rebuild it--anyway, my boyfriend strongly believes in asking my parents' (including my Dad's) permission for my hand... 

Tonight I'm planning on telling my dad that I'm pretty sure my boyfriend is the one and that we'll probably be married within the year... 

How do I even go about telling him this, let alone bringing it up in a way that won't cause him to go into cardiac arrest???!??!

A little help here?!

motoLyn

Just tell him how you and your boyfriend are doing really well  together and that you can see a future with him.  Lead into talking about how special he is to you and that you two see the rest of your lives together.  Then *BAM* hit him with the marriage aspect, but why would he go into cardiac arrest at the sound of you wanting to get married? 

mymissingpuzzlepiece

I'm not really sure why he would go into cardiac arrest after you tell him that you plan on getting married. That seems a bit extreme to me, but okay. And also, why so many ? and !, I think we get the idea.


To actually give some advice, when two people have a conversation it is natural for someone to bring up how things have been going with them. He might start this conversation starter first and tell you how things are going with him or he might expect you to start it. But regardless, don't start the conversation off with , "OMGGG, I'm muurrieed!" Ease into it, start with how things are going with you.

prbright

How old are you, if you don't mind me asking? If you're adult enough to get engaged and married, you should be adult enough to tell your dad.

I understand sometimes it can be hard telling a parent your not super close too, but unless you're 18, I see no reason your dad would go in to cardiac arrest.

leia1979

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_telling-my-dad?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:eaf391ee-2800-4a50-a791-eb3b081ae643Post:f39ac036-1f9e-456d-9129-44aa0a6ad48e">Re: Telling My Dad</a>:
[QUOTE]How old are you, if you don't mind me asking? If you're adult enough to get engaged and married, you should be adult enough to tell your dad. I understand sometimes it can be hard telling a parent your not super close too, but<strong> unless you're 18, I see no reason your dad would go in to cardiac arrest.</strong>
Posted by prbright[/QUOTE]


I was kind of thinking this might be the case.

LoveBug82510

I was checking this girl out....she actually posted a reply to a question and used the word "Gooder"

http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_first-dance_first-dance-thoughts

Elle1036

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_telling-my-dad?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:eaf391ee-2800-4a50-a791-eb3b081ae643Post:851baf96-0db3-48d9-a65e-af0471158fd5">Re: Telling My Dad</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Telling My Dad : I was kind of thinking this might be the case.
Posted by leia1979[/QUOTE]

That was my first instinct, too.

Vintagelove4

I have a similar situation with one of my fathers not being to close even though I still love him. Since your not engaged yet just tell your father that things are serious between you two and tell him how much he means to you. If the marriage topic comes up after that then tell him that you can see that happening soon.

Also on the age thing, if you are under 18, wait. A heathy relationship where both of you can stand on your own two feet without parents support (ie can pay your own bills) is much more important then a wedding. Don't let the white fluff get to your head!

desertsun

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_telling-my-dad?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:eaf391ee-2800-4a50-a791-eb3b081ae643Post:53574008-9cbe-434c-a670-94dd428bb3ff">Telling My Dad</a>:
[QUOTE]Ahh! I'm meeting with my dad tonight, we're just going for coffee... The thing is, I'm not super close to my dad, our relationship has been crumbled so many times, and just now I'm trying to rebuild it--anyway, my boyfriend strongly believes in asking my parents' (including my Dad's) permission for my hand...  Tonight I'm planning on telling my dad that I'm<strong> pretty sure</strong> my boyfriend is the one and that we'll <strong>probably be married within the year.</strong>..  How do I even go about telling him this, let alone bringing it up in a way that won't cause him to go into cardiac arrest???!??! A little help here?!
Posted by Madison Speers[/QUOTE]

Lady, you better be more than "pretty sure" he's the one if you're already picking out music for your wedding day.

Is your BF on board with this one year timeline?

bethsmiles

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_telling-my-dad?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:eaf391ee-2800-4a50-a791-eb3b081ae643Post:23cdcf16-f0e0-41ca-a256-46e1328b59aa">Re: Telling My Dad</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Telling My Dad :<strong> Lady, you better be more than "pretty sure" he's the one if you're already picking out music for your wedding day.</strong> Is your BF on board with this one year timeline?
Posted by desertsun[/QUOTE]

I love you <3

mymissingpuzzlepiece

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_telling-my-dad?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:eaf391ee-2800-4a50-a791-eb3b081ae643Post:27df8979-ca06-4f46-b244-91b0f1b296f1">Re: Telling My Dad</a>:
[QUOTE]I was checking this girl out....she actually posted a reply to a question and used the word "Gooder" <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_first-dance_first-dance-thoughts">http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_first-dance_first-dance-thoughts</a>
Posted by LoveBug82510[/QUOTE]

<div>Oh wow... What does that even mean?</div>

LoveBug82510

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_telling-my-dad?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:eaf391ee-2800-4a50-a791-eb3b081ae643Post:5e000a7e-20b8-4a75-8908-418ccfd62eab">Re: Telling My Dad</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Telling My Dad : Oh wow... What does that even mean?
Posted by mymissingpuzzlepiece[/QUOTE]

I have no idea.  Is it another version of betterer? I haven't heard "Gooder" since my son first started talking. :)