Hello ladies, I'm writing because I am actually pretty upset about something that happened earlier today.
One of my friends (she's also a BM in my wedding) just started seeing a new guy about 2 weeks ago. I met him and liked him. He seemed kind, genuine, and treated my friend well. She and this new guy have been out almost every night this week, and they've stayed up till all hours of the night talking, hanging out, texting, etc. He's really fallen for her very quickly. It honestly reminded me a lot of how FI and I started seeing each other, so I thought the whole thing was very sweet, even though it is going a bit fast.
Today, my friend and I had lunch together and she revealed to me that a couple days ago, he told her that he is married. I was absolutely horrified.
She asked me, "What do I do?" I said, "He's not available, he should have told you from the get-go, but now that you know, you have to stop seeing him!" She told me she didn't know if she could stop seeing him because she likes the attention, she feels a connection with him, he told her this marriage is a bad one, he's only staying for his 12 year old son, etc.
I don't know if I'm just going off the deep-end here because I absolutely do NOT tolerate infidelity of any kind, no matter the reason, but if she continues to see this man, I just don't feel morally right having her as a BM, witnessing my wedding. I feel almost like... I don't know, it's a mockery of marriage. The other part of me says I am being way too judgmental. I don't know what to do. I would say this is none of my business, but she has brought me into it... what do I do? I want to be a good friend, but I also just can't look the other way. After all, most of us here are about to get married! Imagine being this man's wife and finding out he's cheated on you with my friend, and with numerous other women, though he told her that was over 10 years ago.... I just can't stomach it.
Please, any advice? Am I being too judgmental? Thank you so much for your input!