wedding planning AND buying a new home??

hotchkcs

My fiance and I have been living in his moms house (she lives in second home out of state) and I am SUPER anxious to get into our OWN home. I'm thinking about buying a house right in the middle of our wedding planning so that I can register for all new stuff for an all new house!

Has anyone bought a home in the midst of their wedding plans? Or is anyone else crazy enough to consider it?

Give me your pro's and con's!!

CAB1217

Ohhh honey do I feel your pain. We decided to get married FIRST, then move out of his mom's house a year after the wedding. We are on track to still do so, but there was no way we could handle a paying for a wedding + dental school (him) + finding a place to live, let alone buy a house. I am the only income until he graduates.

We did register for what we will need for when we do move out, and got most of the important items. The gifts are being stored at my moms house until we need them.

So, yeah, living with the in laws can be kinda crappy, but in the long run, it will be much less stressful and we will be able to focus on JUST getting our own place, and not everything else that comes with planning a wedding.

GL! What does your FI think, btw?

ETA: Wait, so she doesn't live with you in her house? If that's the case, there's really no need to rush!

lolson1215

I'm doing it right now! FI and I got engaged December 2010. Closed on our home July 2011. It was a COMPLETE re-model so it has been under construction, permitting, etc since August. We lived in a hotel for 66 nights and just finally moved into our home this week. I'm getting married Sunday. It has been a complete whirlwind. We designed our dream home and keeping that in the back of my mind, along with the fact that I was marrying my best friend, got me through it. I'm not going to lie, it had its rough moments. As we got closer to the wedding I cried. A lot. I was often stressed out. But looking back on it all, good friends, my loving FI and red wine got me though it My advice, if you find the home of your dreams dont pass it up. Do it. Just be patient and calm. Do not let little things get to you.

In the end I would not have done it any other way. If my FI and I can do this we truly can do anything.

hotchkcs

My fiance isn't in AS much of a hurry as I am to get out of his mom's house. She visits 2-3 times a year and acts like she still lives in the house, every time she visits! I have a 45 minute commute to work every day, the house needs a ton of work, and I have one little niece and another on the way that I only get to see on weekends. I'm anxious! But I don't want to get into financial troubles trying to pay for a wedding and a house (and any unsuspecting issues that might come along with it)...but I just want us to have our own space together. Grr!

ElleB87

I would probably hold off on buying a house until after the wedding because the stress would drive me nuts, but I guess it depends on what you have on your plate at the moment, how elaborate your wedding will be and how much experience you have buying real estate. 

CAB1217

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_wedding-planning-and-buying-a-new-home?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:6451acab-b9f4-48ed-a4f3-1577e69610ddPost:5e789197-a03f-4a43-a17a-778600a189ba">Re: wedding planning AND buying a new home??</a>:
[QUOTE]My fiance isn't in AS much of a hurry as I am to get out of his mom's house. She visits 2-3 times a year and acts like she still lives in the house, every time she visits! I have a 45 minute commute to work every day, the house needs a ton of work, and I have one little niece and another on the way that I only get to see on weekends. I'm anxious! <strong>But I don't want to get into financial troubles trying to pay for a wedding and a house (and any unsuspecting issues that might come along with it)</strong>...but I just want us to have our own space together. Grr!
Posted by hotchkcs[/QUOTE]
This is what kept us from doing it. My FI also was not in much of a hurry as I was. I say wait it out. Get the wedding out of the way, and re-eval your finances.

mekiakoo

We are doing this right now. Just bought a house 3 weeks ago and we are in the process to close (hopefully by March 8th). I must say that I've kind of put the wedding plans on hold for a bit, but that's because we've already gotten so much done for the wedding.

It hasn't been that bad doing both, however we're more focused on the house right now. But I think I'd be even more stressed if I felt like we were getting behind with our wedding plans. Going through the negotiations was a nightmare for us. I couldn't sleep for days, I woke up with a headache every morning. I went to sleep thinking about numbers and woke up thinking about numbers. My face broke out too!
 
I think anyone can do this, but it can become stressful. I see you've got until June 2013 to get married, you clearly will have a lot more time to plan. Good luck!

jackiea2m

Oh, I'm so glad you posted about this!  My FI and I talked about doing both (wedding planning and buying a house) but I convinced him it would be so stressful.  Change in plans...!  My grandmother (whose house I spent most of my whole life in) will be moving in with my mom... she's getting older and is a bit lonely... We're planning to buy her house (my grandfather built it!) and keep it in the family... it needs some updating, but I'm totally nervous about trying to juggle moving, wedding plans, mortgage, construction, transferring my job, Everything! 

My best advice - lean on your finace!!  I get so stressed because there are too many "unknowns" (when will this happen? when will that happen?  what if?)... he is clear-minded and doesn't suffer from "Bride Brain"... I'm a bit OCD, so when things are out of my control, I tend to tighten up elsewhere... like cleaning :-)  The other thing - take small bites!  One thing at a time, solve that and move forward.  These are some of the biggest moments of your life... cherish that you have your hunny beside you, and Don't sweat the small stuff!  (Oh, and read that book if you haven't... it helps!)

Best of luck! 

sboughten

We are getting married in October and my fiance will be finishing school and starting with a sherriffs department in a different state by November 15th, so we need to buy a house by then.  I'm a teacher so I am having to go through getting my license in another state, plus plan the wedding and we are starting to look online to get a feel for the houses available.  I feel like its all flying at me and its been a little stressful, but I can't wait to be married and settled in our home (right now I live with a roommate I dont get along with and he lives with parents so we don't exactly get alone time or peace and quiet much).  Just keep pushing through everything and stay as organized as possible.

angelsong21

We are planning our wedding and in the process of buying a house right now.  I'm also taking college classes 2 days a week and working full-time at the same time.  I've managed it successfully so far.  Anyone can do it -- you just have to have good time management, have a good support system, and the ability to ask for help when you need it.