Chit Chat

Am I Being Unreasonable?

DFW Brides:  My tough noodles approach failed :P

For the rest of you - So first a little back story -

My sister got engaged last summer and hasn't really done any real planning up until this last week.  When we got engaged in January, the first thing I asked was for any things you had her heart set on.  Her reply was this:  We thought about April/May 2012 but please feel free to look at those dates too.  We haven't really planned anything"  She doesn't have colors, venue, guest list size, plated/buffet/etc chosen.  Literally, nothing.  She has simply met with a wedding planner as of today and decided on Manhattan as her city of choice.

So, now for me - I met my FI on the 28th, began dating him the 28th, and got engaged on the 28th.  (Obviously this date has sentimental value to us).  So, knowing 2012 was the year, I took a look at the calendar.  As we are both outdoor lovers, that was the only thing we had as a "definite" part of the wedding.  So, 2012 has Saturdays (needed as ALL of FI's family is OOT and have said thats the only real day of the week they can travel with):

- January:  93% of days see rain or ice.  Super cold (I mean did you see the super bowl?!)  My FI also made the point that it crams every major event into less than 2 months - Christmas, New Years, My birthday (1/8), Wedding Anniv (1/28) and Valentines Day.  As much as he hates to admit it, the time is tight on any kind of funds and he hates not spoiling me (his words, not mine)

- April: Date we picked. Detailed below

- July: It's Dallas - outside... in the summer.  100+ degrees and I am EXTREMELY fair skinned.  I burn sitting by a window in the summer :P  Also, our best man can not be off during the summer months as he is a commercial pilot for a small regional jet company.  Summer months are damn near impossible to get time off in.

For us, April 28th is the only date that will work for the venue idea we have dreamt of.  It's the very last month the flowers we chose are available.  It's not frigid or blistering hot, and historically it only has a 24% chance of rain (Yeah, I checked :P)  Spring works with my color palette (clover and tangerines).  Everyone can be there.  It spreads out our spending quite a bit for the future. Etc

So, I let my sister know we had chosed 4-28-12... and the you know what hit the fan.   She not only refused to be my bridesmaid but is boycotting it all together and tossing a MASSIVE guilt trip my way.  I have tried to explain to her my reasons for it, my ways of compromising (agreeing to postpone my honeymoon until after hers if she does it the following weekend as there is no major holiday), etc.  I just don't see why she is completely set on me changing my date to accomodate something she hasn't even started planning and after giving me the green light to look at those dates?!

Am I being completely off-base?  Any one have ideas for solutions? (FYI - I am in Dallas, she is in NYC - All of the family we share is in Dallas so they wouldn't have to travel twice)
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