I need advice asap please!!

tjsgirl4ever

Ok I need some advice. My fi went out drinking with some friends last night and stayed over at his friends. I have been sooo jealous all night! Is that totalyl horrible of me?? I feel bad that I feel this way, but its the first time since we have been together that he has gone out like this. It's not that I mind that he is out drinking with his friends, I think it's just that I want to be with him. ahh!! Pllleeeeaaaasssseeee help!!

SarahPLiz

Take a deep breath. He's a grown up, right? If he doesn't know right from wrong you shouldn't be marrying him, so trust him. Get a hobby, or a friend, and don't obsess over the time apart. Being clingy is not a thing most guys like, and you shoud get your jealousy in check right away.

MyNameIsNot

Spending too much time together can be a bad thing.  You will smother each other.  It is normal and healthy for people to go out and do things without their s/o.  Many of my girlfriends make an effort to do a girls' night once a week.  Do you go out with your friends often?  Maybe this should tip you off that you should.

So long as you don't think he's out doing something he shouldn't be, there is no reason to be upset about this.

aerinpegadrak

It's really not healthy for a couple to be together 24/7.  I've read plenty of advice that the happiest couples are the ones who have friends and hobbies independent of each other.  Otherwise, what do you have to talk about?

If FI crashes with friends because he's been drinking, I miss him and would probably have some trouble getting to sleep without him, but that's it, especially if he's being responsible by not drinking and driving.  I really hope you're not planning on telling your FI that you're freaking out and jealous over it, because most guys would be running for the hills at that news.

jeannigirl

Chill its ok. Everyone needs their time away and he needs his time and you need your time.  Just because you have a BF does not mean that you stop having friends and doing things with them. So he drank to much and was smart in just crashing at the friends its better than getting behind the wheel. We all know that drinking and driving is against the law.

Enjoy some time alone. It makes the time that you are together special.

Pirata13

I don't have the energy for this today.

Annie_Warbucks

Does he not have a job? 

I would be annoyed if FI did that on a work night and I was up worrying about where the heck he was and had to get up at 6 am. But he doesn't normally got sloshed and do sleepovers on a school nights. 

jeannigirl

We're talking about an adult here. He will be the only one who suffers from his over drinking.

aerinpegadrak

Besides, not all jobs have weekends as their days off; I have plenty of friends who work full-time (or more) and are off mid-week.

kaynix21

I don't love it when FI goes out drinking with his friends that are single and have no respect for people's relationships.

I really hate it when he doesn't come at night, but I'd rather he's safe than being stupid trying to come home to me when he is not able to drive.

We need time apart too, even though we're BFFs as well.

526SadieSadie

I get a knot in my stomach when Dan goes out with his friends, but it's because I know that he has done some stupid things when he's out with them and I don't want him to get hurt.  Your guy is an adult and the quickest way to drive him away is to try to keep him away from his friends - it will not end well.  That being said, I would be seriously pissed off if Dan went out and stayed out all night without checking in with me from time to time, I don't think that's clingy, it's showing consideration for my feelings because he knows I worry.
If you don't trust him, if you wonder if he's out there with someone else or that his friends are trying to get him to cheat, DO NOT marry him.  If it's just that you don't like being home by yourself, go out with your friends when he goes out!!  Talk to him about maybe sending you a text every once in a while so you know he's ok and he's thinking of you.  He might not realize that you want him to!!!