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Father and Stepmother

I really am getting frustrated with my dad and his wife. When my fiance and I set a date I contacted my dad and told him.I have had very little to do with my dad in the past because he chose not to be there, but he still said he would make arrangement to be there and to keep him posted on the planning and such. Well they live in Cali and I'm in NC, wanting to be polite I wrote my stepmother and message via email and told her of this beautiful dress and that we had decided on a location of the ceremony and reception. I did this just wanting them to feel included in this special day. But now they will not talk to me. Neither one of them will even send me a response regarding what they think of the dress.
  I don't know if i should let this roll of my back or be offended. It's not like he is the one giving me away. He was not there for me through the hard times when I needed him growing up so the pleasure and joy of giving me away goes to a man who was there. so should I let it go and keep trying to be the polite daughter or just give up and say to hell with them?
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