How does your family (immediate or extended) feel about your upcoming wedding day?

mattycam

I am just curious to see how some families react or are reacting to your upcoming nuptuals.

ichellemay1

Our families are probably a little more than ok with it, but it is just over a year away.  Since it is a 2nd wedding for each of us - they are just happy that we are happy.

sb9411

My immediate family is very excited, and my extended family won't care too much until they get the Save the Dates and it starts to feel "real"- that's my guess at least!

Cynthia1207

Everyone actually has been asking how the wedding plans are coming along.  It seems like the perfect conversation starter for everybody. 

younge bride 101

My family couldnt be more happy, thats all that they talk about
FI family, well..... i guess we caould say they dont care to much and would rather not let it even happen

flapper2011

My FI's family is very happy and excited that we are getting married. My family is happy (I'm assuming,) though my mom likes to disagree with my ideas (and as my FI and I are paying for everything ourselves, I just ignore her.)

phut_action

I have a pretty big family but there's significant gaps between the cousins. On my dad's side my siblings and i are the oldest of our generation, the next group of siblings being on average 8 years younger than us. So it had been about a decade since anybody had any weddings in our family when my sister got married in August (mine is in May). The family was just out of their minds excited, it was so moving! Now they can't wait to do it again at mine, that was the big topic sunday morning after her wedding. Everyone was like, "Is it May yet? I wanna do that again!" 

Plus our grandparents are getting older and it just puts more significance on our weddings since they will possibly be the last that my grandparents will be able to attend of our family members. Its a sad truth but it makes us really value the time we have and live it up to the fullest. I can't wait

phut_action

p.s.- Future in-laws are crazy excited. Thankfully we get along well and they love me lots. They also really want more grandbabies (but they'll have to wait a while). They're cute tho, they keep trying to come up with ideas for me, most of which I'm not real into but they're enthusiasm is so nice. 

mrstfuture

My family says that they are really excited but it doesn't really translate well.  No one is offering to help out, and my sister who is my MOH gives the "I have kids" excuse everytime I ask her to help with something.  We live in different cities, she in NY and me in DC, and she thinks that all pre-wedding parties need to be in NY cause she had children.  Granted, the bridal shower is in NY but she thinks that everyone for the bachelorette party (all from the DC area) should travel to NY cause she has kids.  If she doesn't go, I'm fine with it.  My mom and sister ask questions about the wedding, but they don't seem genuinely excited. 

My fiance's family is similar.  My MOH always compares me to his sister and sister-in-law (Oh Jane didn't do that so why would you want that, and Rose did this instead).  My fiance's sister is also a bridesmaid and she's been even less helpful.  OK, she lives in TX but she has yet to pick up a phone to even just chat.  My future SIL... ah, now there is an interesting creature!

I'm having fun planning with my fiance, although the amount of things to do with no help is really getting frustrating and overwhelming...

adrop

I think both of our families are relieved it's finally happening, it took 9.5 years for him to propose to me (some cousins did ask my sister if I was pregnant...I'm not!)!  Everyone is very happy.  My Mum is being super helpful seeing as we live half a world away from where we're getting married and his Mum is just happy that I'm trying to include her as much as possible, she has 2 sons and didn't really get included in the planning for the other son's wedding.

SUMMERBABY070481

My family couldnt be happier as for my fiance' family i think they would rather the wedding NOT happen!!!

adrop

I think both of our families are relieved it's finally happening, it took 9.5 years for him to propose to me (some cousins did ask my sister if I was pregnant...I'm not!)!  Everyone is very happy.  My Mum is being super helpful seeing as we live half a world away from where we're getting married and his Mum is just happy that I'm trying to include her as much as possible, she has 2 sons and didn't really get included in the planning for the other son's wedding.

nicolepmarinelli

For MY immediate/extended family, I selected "They are excited and counting down the days, can't wait! Always asking how my plans are coming along" however if I was talking about my husband's family it would be something more along the lines of "Some of them ask questions, are interested, but mostly they don't care or are angry about being inconvenienced by it."

mattycam

I feel like some care and some don't, to be honest. When I first got engaged, my family and offered well wishes and were happy for me but aside from my mom , dad and uncle and my FI's mom and dad, nobody else really asks any questions. I am not sure about his side but as for my side, some people are warm and some people are cold so you almost expect that type of "that's your business" attitude from specific people.

annagtz82

They're happy and excited for me. Some of my relatives ask how the plans are coming along when we have family get togethers. Alot of my aunts have offered to help me in any way when I need it.

maj4e821

My family is excited, and my mom helps a TON. Future MIL is less than excited... it bothers me, but I hope she comes around because we have a good relationship. His sister is really excited. 

sandraespinosah

My future in-law's say they're very happy, but when we announced our engagement they didn't react nearly as excited as my parents did.

My fiance thinks it might have something to do with the fact they're from Scandinavia and we've dated for so long they were kind of used to me already.

I do think, however, they will be extremly happy once the date gets closer.

DanielleZZ

Both of our families are so excited, they are always asking questions, and offering to help!  FI's friends arent very happy but they seem to be getting used to the idea. We have saved so much money because of our talented family. : )

wiwicaty

Most of them are excited, although not everyone shows it the same way. I know my dad is happy but he never asked about the wedding once since I broke the news. Whatever.

Amisslis

Both of our families are extremely excited. They cannot wait for our wedding, which is in 13 days. They have all been lovely and supportive.

suit10

My family seems excited for us, although they dont ask a lot of questions when they see us, but they seem happy, except for my dad, he's always very quiet with the whole wedding thing and as far as my FI's family, well...since we're already living together I guess they don't think of it as a big deal, they didn't even congratulate us, oh well.

SeptemberFall2011

His family is so excited that it kinda creeps me out!  My family-with the way they are behaving they could care less.  It's all about what sister wants at this point.  I do not believe them for a second that after the baby is born that I will get any wedding related attention-so I am doing alot of my planning myself with his family and my family can find out later on what we do because they are not caring to give their input when I ask for it.

Isotope2011

My fiance's family is super excited.  His Mom has been very helpful and has offered to do so much even though she lives out of state.  All of his uncles, aunts, and cousins sent us cards, called us to congratulate us...it was really touching.  My family, on the other hand, is not so much excited.  They kind of said, "Oh, OK" and that was that.  It was like pulling teeth to get my mom and sister to come out and dress shop with me.  My fiance is bummed that my fam isn't really excited, but the two of us are happy and are making the plans come together ourselves. Glad to know I'm not the only one that may not have an excited family...but at least the inlaws are happy!

AlaisLongthought

I think both families are happy for us, but all of our parents (fiancé's, my mom, & my dad & his wife) are pretty self-centered people & are more interested in how the wedding will impact them than anything else. My future in-laws are bringing all three of their overweight, arthritic, & elderly dogs from Tennessee to upstate NY & the first thing they wanted to know was the name of a good kennel (my future MIL & SIL then wanted us to move the date of the wedding to the Fourth of July weekend to accommodate their usual closing of their florist shop over that weekend, but my first marriage was the Fourth of July weekend, so no, that's not happening). My dad & stepmom were broadly hinting that they wanted to stay at our house as they're coming all the way from Maine to upstate NY (a two-day trip) & were somewhat irritable when we said that we were having only my fiancé's adult children stay w/us (my daughter, almost 13, lives w/us too) & we just didn't have room for any more. So then they hinted that they'd like us to put them up somewhere, but that's not happening either. Unfortunately my fiancé's brother, wife, & daughter live out in Wisconsin & can't afford to make the trip, & I'm betting that my stepsister & her family in PA & my uncle & his wife & their kids & spouses in Philly won't attend either. Having been through all of this w/my previous wedding, though, I'm not terribly surprised. The way my fiancé & I look at it, everyone is an adult & is capable of traveling/planning ahead. If they want to be there enough, they will (the wedding's still seven months away); if not, that's up to them. 

MeganAngela

My family is super excited!  I don't think I've ever seen my whole family collectively so excited about any one thing!  When FI and I told them that we were getting married, they clapped and cheered and gave out hugs and the men all shook my FI's hand and made jokes with him about me being his problem now.  It was hilarious and amazing!  Since then, my family has been writing me and my mom to just congratulate us and ask questions about things.  My friends have done the same.  I was overwhelmed by the outpouring I received!  So many of my friends have offered to help plan (including friends who are currently planning their own weddings or have JUST been married!).  It's just been crazy how much help and love has been given!

On the other hand, FI's family didn't even react when we told them.  And when I mean didn't react, I literally mean no one congratulated him.  No one even looked at him.  They pretty much ignored him.  And when he introduced me to his cousin who I hadn't met yet, I smiled and waved and his cousin didn't even blink.  His grandmother later asked him who I was again.  It wouldn't hurt if she had a mental reason to not remember me, but she has no reason not to.  She just doesn't care whether she remembers me or not.  His mom and sister were happy for us, so that is something.  However, I know that after seeing the reaction that my family gave us that my FI is incredibly hurt by his family's reaction.  They've always seemed to like me and were so grateful that I came to support the family when FI's uncle died, but it's like now they don't even care about FI at all.  I know my mom is trying to make up for it as much as she can so that FI doesn't feel like no one cares.  My family adores him.  I joke with him sometimes that they love him more than they love me!  It just really bothers me that his family has treated him this way and that he's been so hurt by it.  He deserves so much better.  He really does because he is a standout guy.  

Miracle Cat

In our case it's a mixed bag - some people are thrilled, some not so much and others who are focused on themselves...One of my future SILs is planning to come to the wedding, but when she talks to anyone about it she's talking about how cool it is that she'll be sans kids and husband so she can spend time with friends that she hasn't seen in years...It's understandable and perhaps I'd be feeling somewhat less offended if she actually asked once in awhile how the planning was going - nearly everyone else does!

Mary Susan and Chris

I didn't vote, because my family and his are split on two of the responses. Some of them are extremely excited and want to know everything, others are excited but don't ask and a few from my side are just acting like it is another day, especially my grandmother, which hurts my feelings. I don't want to sound selfish but one of my cousins just had a baby and the baby has several serious medical conditions and wont't be coming home for a while and all she talks about is how she can't focus on anything other than the baby and it would be easier for the whole family if my FI and I would just elope so we could all focus on the baby. For years my grandmother has said she prefers babies to weddings, so I am not surprised but it still hurts since she was there for all of my cousins wedding and my siblings weddings and was focused on them.