Seriously, newbs. The world is not unicorns, glitter, and happily ever after. If you think it is, put down the wedding/gossip magazine and pick up a newspaper. This fact does not stop being fact simply because you're getting married.
The world will not treat you with kid gloves. These people live in the real world. We have one thing in common here. We have gotten/ will be getting married. That does not make us Wedaholics Anonymous, where we support your every move and pat you on the head and give you a cookie.
What is rude does not stop being rude because you're getting married and want to do it. No one, NO ONE, cares as much as you do. Except hopefully your Fiance. This does not make them bad people. It means they have lives, and your wedding is only one day in it. It does not trump family issues, babies, finances, illness, and ettiquette.
Stop saying anyone who is different gets criticized. I'm wearing a red wedding dress. A rising, but still very minute practice. When I came on here asking how to handle my mother's reaction to that, one person, ONE PERSON, said you made that choice, suck it up buttercup. She was blunt. Not mean. No one ever said it was tacky, rude, or going to make baby jesus cry. That would have been mean spirited. There's tradition and there's ettiquette. One you can go against, and you'll probably only have a few side eyes from your elder family members, the other you can also go against, but it pisses people off. The girls here are going to tell you that.
The truth only makes you angry if you don't want to hear it. So stop asking for it. Be honest and say you want validation, not opinions or advice. If a multitude of people tell you it's a bad idea, and there are few, if any, people on your side- that might mean the problem is you, babycakes. There is a world beyond your wedding. If you piss it off, it may not want to be your friend when you come back from your honeymoon.
And I realize I'm a newb. But since I was not raised to believe I am a special snowflake, I like to think I'm a newb who gets it.