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Is your guest list under control or out of control?

I was curious to know how people are managing their guest list. Have you been able to keep your numbers low or do you find your guest list increasing by the minute?
For those who are already married, did your 50 guest wedding turn into 100 by your wedding day? Please share your thoughts and your tactics to keeping your guest list in check.

Re: Is your guest list under control or out of control?

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    We cut ours down as far as it could possibly go.  Anyone directly involved in the wedding, other family members of that tier (for instance, DH's uncle performed the wedding, so his siblings were invited, but no other aunts/uncles), and spouses.  C'est la.  Definitely one of our best decisions, instantly got the cost under control and made the whole thing run much more smoothly.
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    First wedding - out of control.  My XMIL wanted to invite everyone who she had gone to a shower, wedding, baby shower, baptism, etc.  She believed they "owed" us gifts for the gifts she had given over the years.  Plus, there were a lot of people my own parents felt they "had" to invite.  Since they were paying - I didn't say anything.  Plus, I was much younger then.  ;)

    This time - totally in control.  It is literally immediate family and a few friends. 
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    We wanted to invite about 150, but FIL's list puts us as 201.  FMIL has offered to cover the costs associated with extra guests.
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    Ours is only hovering around 80 at the moment. We predicted around 70, since we don't have very big families and have lost quite a few friends over the years, so it's not going to be extremely grand. We did have a few more at first, but as we went back over the list a couple of times when we saw the number was closer to 90, we agreed that certain people really didn't need to be invited and that we had originally added them just because they're family and you don't really want to offend family, right? We're [or maybe I should just say I am, lol] doing all the planning and most of everything else by ourselves [pretty much minus the food and venues], so that really helps keep our number tight since we're on such a low budget for this wedding. We're aiming around 6-7k, and the thing that jacks up the price of a wedding most is the number of people, so keeping that in mind has really helped us.

    I think it's all about being practical. Like I mentioned before, some family members may get upset that they weren't invited, but it's not the end of the world. Obviously no one wants to hurt anyone's feelings, but you have to do something if you don't want your list to get out of control if you can't afford it.
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    Mildly out of control.  Our total guest list count is in line with what we had initially estimated, but looking at some of the names on there, it could definitely be cut more.  We could probably cut 25-30 people pretty easily, which would make me happy. 

    But FMIL insisted on inviting a ton of their friends (FILs and my parents are both contributing).  And since she was going overboard with inviting people my dad decided he might as well invite his cousins that I rarely see.  FMIL sees no need to cut the guest list because we are at our target number (which I now realize is higher than it needed to be) and I can't ask my family to cut people when they already have 25 fewer guests on their list than FILs.  Oh well.
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    We started off wanting to invite 150 guests. Then when my mom and dad added some of their aunts, cousins, coworkers and friends, it went up to 177. We cut the kids out becuase then it would have been an additional 30 guests and our venue only holds 200 people. We're probably going to cut out +1s also for anyone who isn't in a serious relationship.

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    In Response to <a href=" BoardsForum:14Discussion:aece5990-d2f6-4f95-8278-62ffa75b915dPost:2be52ed9-5656-4fcc-a2ad-f94206acfcf7">Re: Is your guest list under control or out of control?</a>:
    [QUOTE] We're probably going to cut out +1s also for anyone who isn't in a serious relationship.
    Posted by annagtz82[/QUOTE]

    That is exactly what we are going to do. At first we were aiming for 150-170 but now we are well over 200. We are revisitng our lists and have been cutting people. At the end of the day, we have to go with what we can afford and we do not want to be paying for a wedding years later!
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    We figured 50; invited 50, and ended up with 52 coming.  So not to bad, but as we were going through the process, it was easy to see how it could get out of control.  My first wedding did because the P's were paying, and like ichellemay's, they felt they had to invite everyone they had ever come in contact with.  This time around, it was family and close friends.
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    Our guest list started at around 70 guests, then we allowed the parents to invite those that they thought should be there.  My mom didn't add anyone to the mix - yet. My FMIL was starting to go overboard and my FI told her it was not to be a huge family reunion.  She agreed and told him to only invite the family he personally knew.  We're at 110 now and hopefully that will be where we stay,  I know that about 22 of the them will not show because of the distance they would have to travel.

    So for now it's manageable.
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    We're looking at around 75 and the WP and right now we're right on schedule. I'm having to pry people out of FI, I keep asking, "Who do you want to invite" and he's like "I dunno" However, he's been really great about helping me plan, so no complaints
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    We were hoping to have around 140 on our list and so far its at 216...definitely out of control.

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    We originally said 150-175. We are now up to 225 so far. Eeek! BUT, everyone says we can expect a fair portion of guests not to show, so hopefully we'll be closer to the 175 range when its all said and done.


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