NWR: Bridesmaid is an overeager salesperson

AJuliaNJ

One of my bridesmaids sells for one of those companies where you have parties where you sell stuff to people. She actually does pretty well as she has a large group of SAHM-friends that have parties selling other stuff. She is always promoting it everywhere, from someone on line at a store to waitresses at a restaurant. Since it is sort of bachelorette-related she has even promoted it at my bridal salon (I was coming out in dresses and I'd find her by another group of people trying to set up a party--not that I needed her full attention, I'm not THAT girl--I just felt a little like she was invading their privacy and could be annoying to the other girl trying on her dresses).

Now all of this I find mildly annoying, but wouldn't actually say anything as I realize it does not reflect on me. What I do have an issue with is her continuing to bring it up to my other friends. She constantly takes polite questions from them as a sign that someone is interested in having a party and will keep pushing. It's gotten to the point where I'm just like, BM, why don't you just leave the catalog and she can look it over later? I know this group of friends is not interested in having a party like this ever. I've told her this, but again, she'll subtly bring it up, a friend will ask her a polite question, and then it is full-blown sales mode.

Does anyone have some advice? Or just want to commiserate with me on a similar friend you have?

daubachsgirl23

I can imagine that would get a bit annoying.  I think your best bet is to, once you notice she's starting to bring up the parties, change the subject immediately.  I would do this before she gets to distribute any catalogs, so she doesn't have anything visual to use to bring the conversation back to the parties.  I would hope that if you do that often enough, she would stop trying to bring up the parties.

Good luck!

AJuliaNJ

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_nwr-bridesmaid-is-an-overeager-salesperson?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:af1a6b16-c6b4-4a5a-9767-3ab91e41120aPost:fb0630f5-cfd4-4503-90dc-4f393a7c7a12">Re:NWR: Bridesmaid is an overeager salesperson</a>:
[QUOTE]I'm going to go out on a limb and say she sells sex toys. I don't think there's much you can do other than encourage your friends to be firm. If they don't want the party, it's up to them to stop being polite and basically stringing her along. They need to say no thank you and shut down the conversation. You CAN ask her not to solicit when you are at places like the bridal salon because it's probably against their company policy and can get your whole party kicked out.
Posted by StageManager14[/QUOTE]

Thank you. You're right. I should start working this from the other end as well. Instead of just telling her they're not interested, I should tell them to be more firm about their disinterest. I haven't done this at all.

I always just feel responsible because I brought her. She is my last friend from high school, and my other friends I met in college. The first few years I knew my college friends I didn't bring her around because she was married with a new baby, lived an hour away, and wasn't interested in partying and such. Now that we are all older and everyone's calmed down, I really would like to be able to hang out with them all at once, especially given that I live out of town now and have limited time to spend with everyone.

Summer2011Bride

Your other friends just need to put their foot down with her. Firmly say, "No thank you I'm not interested" until she gets the picture. You CAN pull her aside and say something if you want to depending how bad it gets.

I agree with Stage that most stores have a policy against soliciting. If someone found out what she was doing, or if another customer complained to management, at the very least they would ask her to stop doing it; at most, she and/or your group would be asked to leave. I would tell her that if you plan on going to a bridal shop with her again. "Hey, friend, I know you're excited about your business, but most stores don't let you solicit and I am afraid if you do, we may be asked to leave."

emeejeeayen

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Sex toys are great, but I would die laughing if a chick I didn't know tried to sell me some (let alone a party revolving around them?) in a place other than a sex toy shop. What the what.

MobKaz

I have heard of women who will use a bridal and/or bachelorette party to manipulate their "business" as well.  If and when you hear of any pre-wedding events being planned, you may do well to inquire as to whether this particular BM is involved in the planning, and to what extent.  

I realize that as the bride, your involvement in pre-wedding parties should be limited.  However, if your mom, or a very trusted friend could be "forewarned" of such a possibility, you may offset potential drama or embarrassment.  

MoonlightSilver

The only way to be successful in that business model IS to be a pushy, overeager salesperson. I'd just be direct with her, "Please don't try and sell items / parties when we're hanging out doing wedding stuff. Thanks."