Is this asking too much?

Pokes

So, Im in a wedding coming up and the bride has told all her bridesmaids that we HAVE to stay in the hotel where the wedding is being held the night of the wedding.... not the night before... the night of... after the wedding has taken place. While i understand us staying in the hotel the night before... after the rehersal to do the whole bonding thing... but the night of the wedding I dont understand. She is expecting us to pay for our own rooms, but seeing that my parents are close by and I live about 30 min away I cant see or justify why we HAVE to pay and stay there that night. Am I wrong here or is being told we have to pay $XXX to stay at the reception site after the wedding has taken place is a little much?

amandasblum

I would tell her to kick rocks in the nicest way possible. I dont expect anyone to stay in the hotel after the wedding. Thats just not fair. What will she tell you next, what to wear the day after. .. Thats not cool...

rco118

OK, this terrible, but does she have to know?Make the reservation, cancel the day of (I'm hoping that's the policy) and then stay with your folks.You'll just need to get up super early and say you checked out.There's probably bad bride karma coming to me b/c I said that, but its probably what I'd do.  If I were her, I would probably want everyone to stay to make sure they "had a good time" and that the dance floor was full until the end.  I think you can definitely make that happen!

manna1212

That is definetely asking way too much! I would assume that she is going to be with her husband, that night anyway, so I don't see what the point would be of you guys staying there. Good luck!

ninnypooper

Not before - understandableNot of - no way!That just seems ridiculous. I couldn't have imagined asking my girls to do that. I paid for them to stay with me the night before, but they had their dates or significant others and that whole MONEY factor to think of for after the wedding. The wedding is over, who would I be to dictate where they HAD to stay.Lame...I say stay with you parents or just drive home. The wedding is done, she'll get over it.

Molly Councilman

It is rude and ridiculous for the bride to dictate where you stay if she's not paying for it.  FI and I will be paying for our bridesmaids and groomsmen to stay at our hotel the weekend of the wedding.

jthennigar

I like Amanda's suggestion of telling her to kick rocks. I ditto that! Does she actually have a reason as to WHY she's asking you to do this? Or is it just because she says so? Either way, I wouldn't if I were you.

chayer227

wow...  yep, too much to ask!It's one thing to ask that your friends are there for you the night before and even early morning the day of, but to insist that they pay MORE money to stay the night of the wedding when you have a free place to stay close by, is just plain rude.  I assume that you're paying for a dress you'll never wear again, shoes you aren't likely to wear again, hair and maybe even makeup...  then travel expenses (even if it's just gas money), hotel for the night before, gifts for the wedding and shower, possibly helping to throw a shower...  Some brides just get too caught up in their details, and lose all perspective of what others are dealing with.  Like one of the pp's said, she'll be otherwise occupied that night, so what does she care what everyone else does?  RUDE.

kelstar824

I'd like to know what her reasoning is...??Are they getting a free room or something if they have a certain number of people staying there?

Gabs71109

I absolutely think she is asking too much of you! As long as you plan to be there until the very end of the reception I see no reason for you to sleep there. I don't envy your situation but you are well within your rights to tell her sleeping there is a no go!GL!

mboss928

That sounds kind of weird.  She should be giving all her attention to her new hubby that night, not worrying about the other bridesmaids.  Is she asking this to guarantee you stay for the entire reception? or maybe she doesn't want her bridesmaids drinking and driving?

Steffy3217

Pokes, I can only think the main reason for her wanting you to stay the night would be to avoid drinking and driving. BUTI assume that your hubby may also be joining you for wedding..  but even if your drinks are paid for, DH probably won't have the money to get super smashed at the wedding.