$ and makeup

Princess0214

i can not afford to pay for my bridesmaids makeup but I would like for them to get it professionally done. In my hunt for a reasonably priced and talented artist my bm suggested a very good high priced artist. I would love to use the artist but she is outside of my and the other bm's budget. My bm asked if it was okay if she just went the higher priced artist. I expressed to her how I would never say no, but would prefer if she took the back seat in the glam mobile and go to the artist I found. She completely told me off. Saying she was only trying to make my day flawless. I apologized and told her was just saying how I felt. But she can't let it go.. How can I make this right?

ShakeUpTampa

1. If you are dictating that they get their make up done. YOU PAY.
2. If they want to use your artist let them know the cost and time they would have to be there.
3. You are wrong, she is right...and each girl could tell you off and say no and do their own make up. You can't control what is put on their face.

Saying that I am getting myself professionally done with a trial. I gave the option to all the girls before I signed the contract and 2 wanted it done and 2 did not. I am fine with all their choices. They so kindly got their dress orders in time and were nice enough to be OK paying for their own shoes due to it not being an easy to find color and I got them a huge discount. I couldn't ask for a better bunch of girlfriends.

I think they are perfectly capable of doing their own make up to make themselves feel beautiful and natural.

Princess0214

It is not a demand, it is an option to get the makeup done. I wanted to find someone everyone could use at a reasonable price. Her lady cost a fortune I did not want to ask the other girls to do that. But you made a good point thanks.

J&K10910

But they don't all have to get their makeup done by the same person.  If she wants to spend big bucks to get her makeup done, what's wrong with that?  Just because she's using the high priced MUA doesn't mean that you and the rest of the girls have to.  Find someone you want to use, and then let your BMs know that they have the option of using her, using someone else, or doing their own.

Princess0214

The big deal is I would love to use her for my day but she is 3xs my budget... So it upset me a bit that she would use her, it see the error. Thanks for the advise.

Grits8812

If you want their makeup professionally done, you pay for it.  If they are agreeing to pay for it, then they can go to whoever they want, they don't all have to go to the same girl.  If one of the girls decide that they don't want their makeup done professionally, or it is out of budget, they can do their own.

Princess0214

Yeah it sounds so silly now... Welp, hopefully I can get this mess fixed and my makeup right... Oh the webs we weave.

Gabrielle76

Good job for recognizing that it was your mistake, a lot of people who are new to the board don't do that. 

Honestly, I understand being jealous of your bridesmaid, if she gets to have her makeup done by someone you wanted and couldn't afford.  However, you should keep it to yourself.  Let the bridesmaids do whatever they want makeup-wise, and don't worry about it.  As my FMIL has told me a few times, you don't have to worry about the bridesmaids upstaging you, at a wedding, no one is ever more beautiful than the bride. 

LeenieLane

Do you have a MAC make up studio in a local mall? The girls could get their make up done for free if they purchase at least $60 worth of product. They could maybe buy something they can reuse rather than spending money on a MUA and washing it off at the end of the night. ETA: They may be more inclined to spend the money if they have something to show for it. It is worth a shot. Just ask the MUA to use wedding appropriate make up colors! Some studios get a little funky.

Viczaesar

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_makeup?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:cec00f78-9df3-4fd0-a1b0-726898edee16Post:dfa97543-aa89-41ab-8cfb-781b2ff3f6b1">$ and makeup</a>:
[QUOTE]i can not afford to pay for my bridesmaids makeup but I would like for them to get it professionally done. In my hunt for a reasonably priced and talented artist my bm suggested a very good high priced artist. I would love to use the artist but she is outside of my and the other bm's budget. My bm asked if it was okay if she just went the higher priced artist. I expressed to her how I would never say no, but would prefer if she took the back seat in the glam mobile and go to the artist I found. She completely told me off. Saying she was only trying to make my day flawless. I apologized and told her was just saying how I felt. But she can't let it go.. How can I make this right?
Posted by Princess0214[/QUOTE]
You don't get to tell them they have to get to their make up professionally done if you're not paying for it.  You also don't get to tell them where they can (or can't) get it done if you're not paying for it.  You make it right by telling your ladies that they're free to make the choice to either do their own make up or pay for it, and by apologizing to your BM for being overcontrolling and selfish.

Princess0214

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_makeup?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:cec00f78-9df3-4fd0-a1b0-726898edee16Post:a76b7775-806b-4246-a0d8-cf6d1042273c">Re: $ and makeup</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to $ and makeup : You don't get to tell them they have to get to their make up professionally done if you're not paying for it.  You also don't get to tell them where they can (or can't) get it done if you're not paying for it.  You make it right by telling your ladies that they're free to make the choice to either do their own make up or pay for it, and by apologizing to your BM for being overcontrolling and selfish.
Posted by Viczaesar[/QUOTE]



Yo, pull the brakes! I addressed the real issue; which was not wanting to be out shined.
If that is the case let the girls pick out their dresses then!! Who am I to have an opinion about getting hair and makeup done... Oh I am the bride. Her lady cost 89 bucks per BM I found someone who is 40 bucks and I asked each BM if that was okay.
I was wrong for getting upset and probably overly emotional for being jealous Offer advise not judgement. The ladies in my party get their makeup done for a night out on the town so this not and uncommon request in my group.

Princess0214

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_makeup?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:cec00f78-9df3-4fd0-a1b0-726898edee16Post:0a5da9c6-eced-4131-b484-fb7c3ccfac1e">Re: $ and makeup</a>:
[QUOTE]Good job for recognizing that it was your mistake, a lot of people who are new to the board don't do that.  Honestly, I understand being jealous of your bridesmaid, if she gets to have her makeup done by someone you wanted and couldn't afford.  However, you should keep it to yourself.  Let the bridesmaids do whatever they want makeup-wise, and don't worry about it.  As my FMIL has told me a few times, you don't have to worry about the bridesmaids upstaging you, at a wedding, no one is ever more beautiful than the bride.  :)
Posted by Gabrielle76[/QUOTE]



Thank you for totally getting it! Yeah my fiancé gave the same advise. I talked it over with the BM and at the end of the conversation we both got it. She also said 'everyone will see you that day not my (the BM) makeup' I guess I can put this one in the bridezilla scrap book.. Lol but truly thank you for your comment.

Princess0214

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_makeup?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:cec00f78-9df3-4fd0-a1b0-726898edee16Post:69065d41-f9b8-4abc-9269-d64bdacefa2b">Re: $ and makeup</a>:
[QUOTE]Do you have a MAC make up studio in a local mall? The girls could get their make up done for free if they purchase at least $60 worth of product. They could maybe buy something they can reuse rather than spending money on a MUA and washing it off at the end of the night.


ETA: They may be more inclined to spend the money if they have something to show for it. It is worth a shot. Just ask the MUA to use wedding appropriate make up colors! Some studios get a little funky.
Posted by LeenieLane[/QUOTE]



I was trying ti keep it under 40, as the other girls requested. But I love your idea! Maybe a gift card of the difference would entice everyone... Hmmm thanks!

Viczaesar

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_makeup?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:cec00f78-9df3-4fd0-a1b0-726898edee16Post:b8ef256a-3333-485a-bf52-c40177b9491d">Re: $ and makeup</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: $ and makeup : Yo, pull the brakes! I addressed the real issue; which was not wanting to be out shined. If that is the case let the girls pick out their dresses then!! <strong>Who am I to have an opinion about getting hair and makeup done... Oh I am the bride.</strong> Her lady cost 89 bucks per BM I found someone who is 40 bucks and I asked each BM if that was okay. I was wrong for getting upset and probably overly emotional for being jealous Offer advise not judgement. The ladies in my party get their makeup done for a night out on the town so this not and uncommon request in my group.
Posted by Princess0214[/QUOTE]
You as the bride get to have an opinion about YOUR hair and  make up done.  Not your bridesmaids, unless you're paying for it (and even then, if they're not interested you shouldn't force the issue.  "I am the bride" is seriously the most annoying refrain ever, and should never be used as an excuse for your actions. 

I choose to offer both advice and judgment on your actions and words.  Deal with it. 

LeenieLane

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_makeup?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:cec00f78-9df3-4fd0-a1b0-726898edee16Post:40bc9a3d-ff2a-4600-bff9-fde435a69ba9">Re: $ and makeup</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: $ and makeup : I was trying ti keep it under 40, as the other girls requested. But I love your idea! Maybe a gift card of the difference would entice everyone... Hmmm thanks!
Posted by Princess0214[/QUOTE]

You're welcome. You can check some local beauty schools, too. I know schools around me (in CT) will allow the students to do make-up & hair for either free or a very low cost to the public.
Good luck!!

Princess0214

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_makeup?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:cec00f78-9df3-4fd0-a1b0-726898edee16Post:9525c005-f93a-4bf4-929d-72e405ac8121">Re: $ and makeup</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: $ and makeup : You as the bride get to have an opinion about YOUR hair and  make up done.  Not your bridesmaids, unless you're paying for it (and even then, if they're not interested you shouldn't force the issue.  "I am the bride" is seriously the most annoying refrain ever, and should never be used as an excuse for your actions. <strong> I choose to offer both advice and judgment on your actions and words.</strong>  Deal with it. 
Posted by Viczaesar[/QUOTE]

<div>People come on here for advise not judgement. They already know something is not right in the situation. If you choose to be of help, do so in kindness. Have a great day.</div><div>
</div><div>P.S. No need to respond. I think we both made our points.<img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/scripts/tinymce/plugins/emotions/images/smiley-laughing.gif" border="0" alt="Laughing" title="Laughing" /></div>

NcsuPsych

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_makeup?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:cec00f78-9df3-4fd0-a1b0-726898edee16Post:6fb3c335-62d3-4dae-81b9-42050cca1ace">Re: $ and makeup</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: $ and makeup : People come on here for advise not judgement. They already know something is not right in the situation. If you choose to be of help, do so in kindness. Have a great day. P.S. No need to respond. I think we both made our points.
Posted by Princess0214[/QUOTE]

Psssh, I don't know what you're talking about, but I come here for advice, not advise. ;)

Princess0214

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_makeup?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:cec00f78-9df3-4fd0-a1b0-726898edee16Post:f1896370-02cb-42d0-81a2-ee0a3cb34ff8">Re: $ and makeup</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: $ and makeup : Psssh, I don't know what you're talking about, but I come here for advice, not advise. ;)
Posted by NcsuPsych[/QUOTE]

<div>LOL, what can I say you got me... <img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/scripts/tinymce/plugins/emotions/images/smiley-tongue-out.gif" border="0" alt="Tongue Out" title="Tongue Out" /></div>