Dress Excitment Cut Short

mkurek

Oh my gosh!  So today I went and looked at my first venue - OVERWHELMING and then went to look at dresses. I was so excited - I found my dress at DB and bought it...the first day out.  When I told my FI he said, "I wish you weren't so impatient!"  What a blowup we had....he had no idea that I've spent the past 6 months looking for dresses online.  I even asked his opinion about the 25 dresses I had selected online last Saturday. Anyone else have this kind of experience with their FI or is mine unique?  I've already had two planning melt-downs and we've only been engaged a week!  I guess that makes me sound a bit crazy but I'm trying to plan a wedding for 200+ people in 4 months!http://www.davidsbridal.com/webapp/wcs/stores/servlet/ProductDisplayView?storeId=10052&catalogId=10051&catentryId=6096946Anyway, here it is.  I can't get the picture to copy and paste.

jagore08

I can understand where your FI is coming from. You've only been engaged a week and the first time you went to try on dresses you bought one. When is your wedding date?

mkurek

Well my wedding date is December 5th, 2009.

crking24

   Well, I agree you needed to find the dress very soon. Wedding planning will have it's moments, it about give and take and this planning will prepare the two of you to how life will be with one another. Perhaps he wanted you to try on every dress in town before your found the one. Really I do understand. I have been in tears a few time with my H2b over wedding planning. Lot's of luck on the planning!                                    Chrissie

mkurek

My FI is very frugal and he researches everything before purchasing so he probably wanted me to try on every dress in INDIANA!  Hehe.  At least I'm laughing now.  I even told my mom and my sister (who were with me), "I'm not buying a dress today."  I guess I was wrong.

bridesrighthand

Since your wedding is in 4 months, I see why you bought it so quickly. Try not to let him get you down. It's a beautful dress!

dianenjnj

very nice dress and at a very good price, he's lucky you are being so conservative!guys just don't get the wedding thing you'll have to share all the giggles/squeals, etc., with your female friends/relatives...they get how a woman planning a wedding feels!(hopefully you are on the same page on finances/spending, etc., if that's his major concern...that could become a real big problem if you can't agree)you really have no choice but to get moving on getting your dress, etc.  i think you did a fine job. 

dsbargaehr

Since your wedding is only four months away you bought your dress at the best time. Usually, you buy your dress 6-4 months before your wedding just in case it takes a while to make it and for alterations. And that is great that you have been researching online for 6 months!I have also had a similar experience with my FI but it is more on finding a place for the wedding. I found our wedding venue 9 months before the wedding and he thought I jumped the gun when really I have been researching different places for months! You just need to ignore him for this because this dress that you found was THE ONE and FI's don't really understand that.As for meltdowns, I have had plenty! It happens especially planning such a wonderful event! I found the best thing to do is at the beginning of each month create a list on what you want to accomplish. There is a list on the knot that can help you but, the one that helped me the most was at Micheals! There is a wedding notebook from Martha Stewart and it breaks everything down so it is not as stressful. The planning becomes simple once you just relax and create a list! Best of Luck!

Spim7

actually if you're getting married in 4 months it's definitely time to be buying your dress. My suggestion is that you leave him out of all strictly girly aspects of the planning and let him focus on the other stuff with you like food, music etc. Dresses and flowers probably won't get you the reaction that you want.

Googs79

It's normal to have some moments of frustration or irritability when planning.  Remember, getting married is a big deal!  Your FI's comments appear to have less to do with you buying a wedding dress and more of a general statement about your planning style.  He's stressed and doesn't want to rush into making a poor decision about the wedding, but maybe he feels you want to speed up the planning.  There's no right or wrong here.  Just make sure you have open communication with one another throughout the process and try not to sweat the small stuff too much.  And CONGRATS on your engagement and finding a beautiful dress. 

mkurek

Thanks everyone for your responses.  I'm excited about marrying the love of my life....I'm just ready to hand the planning over to someone else.

steffenfam

holy crap if I showed my husband 25 dresses, he'd be zoned out by dress #4 and asleep by dress #6.

CrystalandDean

My FI and I have only been engaged for about 3 weeks and we have had several disagreements and there have been several meltdowns already. I am also worried about this whole experience. We are getting married in Jan 2010 so I understand the urgency to get things planned. It is nice to hear that other people are having the same issues.

jlmehrmann

I just went out dress shopping with a couple other girlfriends who are also engaged the other night. It was only supposed to be a fun ladies night out, not to buy a dress or for that matter find THE ONE.Well we went to David's Bridal and I found THE ONE! My mother and I are going back tonight for me to try it on for her and hopefully purchase it. It's on sale and the sale ends soon, so I don't have much time if I want that dress.But my FI and my father think alike and want me to keep looking and try on more dresses. I completely understand that my wedding is still a year away (believe me I was not planning on seriously shopping for a dress until November), but when you find THE ONE, you just know. Guys don't understad this concept.Plus your wedding is only a few months away so you're on a time crunch. Just accept your FI's suggestions and thank him for the advice, but you are still going ahead and buying the dress. I can understand what he's thinking with you only being engaged a week, but then again, us women have been tearing out pictures and dreaming of our wedding day since we were born. By the time that engagement ring is on our fingers, it's just step 10 in the planning process by then.Have fun and good luck. :-)