Not Have the "This is It" Moment

mwhec

I've been to at least ten store and have tried on countless dresses. There are a few dresses that I really like but I don't feel like I've had that, "this is it" moment. I just want to put on a dress and feel like its me. I want something with a vintage feel that is unique. Should I keep looking? I feel like I'm starting to confuse myself. I'm also starting to feel very overwhelmed.  Any advice? Did anyone buy their dress without knowing right away when putting it on?

rlynn007

I would keep trying on dresses.  I kinda liked a few dresses, they were okay but nothing was love.  I randomly decided to go into David's and try on a few more.  I grabbed a dress because it was the right color, not that I thought I would like it, and tried it on and *poof* it was MY dress.  The best part was I had just told the girl helping me that I didn't believe in the "it moment" dress and then I found it....long story short keep trying.

msteph82

Keep at it! Your dress is out there. Try Augusta Jones - she makes some modern, yet vintage dresses. I have a friend who tried on over 60 some odd dresses - went up to the rack, grabbed a dress she never thought would look good on her and it was the ONE. Hang in there hun! Your dress will find you soon.

razdazzle_22377334

I would say keep trying, but if you try on too many dresses, you may be more overwhelmed and confused.Were there any dresses you really liked but weren't sure about?  I would re-try those dresses with a fresh perspective.  I did that with a few that I liked and amongst the three I think I found the one.

aerinpegadrak

You know, not everyone has a "this is it" moment, with the crying and the screaming and such.  For some people, it's just, "Oh, I like this dress a lot, I think I'll buy it."  I know that's how it was with me.  If you're holding out that moment when everyone starts to cry, you may be waiting a really long time.Definitely take a break if they're all starting to look the same, so that you can look at it fresh.  And since you're looking for something vintage and unique, might I suggest http://www.unique-vintage.com? They're one of my favoritest boutiques ever, I'm definitely getting my AHR dress from there.

rmfriedman

I understand how you feel. I never had a "this is it" moment while shopping....but rather really liked 3 dresses and chose between the 3 based on my opinions and the opinions of my friends/family. I got the "this is it" feeling once I had decided it was my dress and imagined walking down the aisle to my FI. I would say if you've visited 10 stores, the answer is not to go to more stores, but rather pick one that you really like and go with it. Remember you can always make little alterations to make it more unique. Don't drive yourself crazy!

mbcdefg

I didn't have a "This is it!" moment with tears and fireworks and screaming. But I DID feel confident that the dress I chose is the one I wanted, and that I made the right decision. There's probably not "just one" dress out there for you, but you also shouldn't feel like you're settling. You should feel comfortable, pretty and happy in it. It's fine to have a few that you like best, but don't just pick one of those to get it over with. I'd look at the ones you liked best, maybe try them on again, and if you don't find a clear winner then maybe make a list of everything you liked about each dress. Then see if the salon salespeople can help you find a dress that incorporates all of those positive elements.

wedding1168

you may also not find your dress in its exact form.  i had to alter my dress from an a-line to a trumpet to make it MY dress.  so i had to have a vision of what i wanted, and when i found the top i liked, i had the bottom altered.  it turned out amazing.  don't get discouraged.  it was also the very last of the hundreds of dresses i treied on. 

jaimelody

I'm not sure I would tell you to keep trying on dresses... I started to confuse myself too. Are there some common elements in the ones you like that you can pick out? That might help pull it all together. I didn't get the "OMG this is it moment" either. I went back to try on a dress I liked previously and still loved it. I said if I went back and still loved it I would buy it. I cried when I put it on, but there are so many other things that need to fall into place before I feel like I'm a bride - the veil, shoes, etc. I don't consider it settling because I do love the dress, but for some people, I don't think we  get that "this is it" feeling. And that's okay.

Sabina1313

I never had a "this is it" moment either, with the crying and whatnot.  I had tried on maybe 20 dresses of various styles, shapes, colors, with different beading, no beading, lace, etc.  Found one that I liked more than the rest, continued to think about it after I tried on some more, and realized I just liked it more than the rest of them and there wasn't much point in trying more on.My friend was the same way, she never had a moment either.  Not even through her fittings.  She just knew it was the dress.Some people just don't have it   Don't kill yourself trying to find a dress that makes you cry is what some of us are getting at.  You might not be one of those people.  heh

Bridgeebabee

I was irritated that I didn't know instantaneously either.  I tried on a dress at the second bridal shop I went to... I got a little emotional looking at myself in the mirror because I felt I looked absolutely beautiful and bridal - a feeling that wasn't as strong with the other dresses.  I looked at several other places before I went back and bought that dress, but was still nervous about not having the OMG THIS IS MY DRESS! moment.  I'm glad to hear that others didn't really have it either.  If you know that you look and feel beautiful in a dress and that it will take your FI's breath away on your wedding day, I'd say you've found The One, no matter how many Kleenex's you DON'T need when trying it on.

tncassa

Don't give up!!  I had the same thing.  I tried on about 80-100 and I would find ones I loved but weren't IT - there was always one thing I wanted to change about the dress.  Finally, I found THE dress when I least expected it.  I knew right away - and there was nothing I wanted to change about it.  Keep hanging in there but definately keep tabs of your favorite top 5 or 3 just to be safe.  And then when you find the one you can compare it to your top choices and it will blow them away! 

erinrc1

I normally wouldn't do this, but since I don't know you... The dress I got for my wedding might be of interest if you are looking for a vintage feel -- however, it is still a little bit modern as well. You may not like it, but I thought I'd at least pass it along... http://www.jacquelinexclusive.com/fbc.php?sz=Fall 2009&st=19804 Best of luck in your dress search!

may2010wedding

I was the same way at first. Then when I went dress shopping with my family, my sister grab a dress that I would never of tried on in my life. Go figure it turned into a "this is it" moment. My mom was not with at the time but we went back the next day and she cried when I came out to show her which I knew then I found my dress. I would keep trying on and looking. Try some sytles you might not have ever looked at you might just find "the one"!

writersblock2020

I haven't had the "ahHA" moment yet, and I bought it a month ago. It was gorgeous, I looked good in it, and it was a steal, so I bought it. But there was no light bulb or choir of angels. Every time I look at it, though, I fall a little more in love with it.Hope this helps.

mwhec

This has all been such a help. I feel much more relaxed. I've narrowed it down to my two favorites and am just going to think about it for a little while. Thanks again!

hillaryeggert

I think I was in your situation, trying on "countless" dresses, really liking some but not being certain... it really does become overwhelming.Work on other wedding details for a while (even a week or two if it's all you can spare) and return to the search when you feel refreshed.  I did, and when I went back to it, I realized there were about 2 or 3 dresses I would have been thrilled with that I had already tried on at least twice.  Geez.And no definitive "this is it" moment here either (sisters and mom did though!).  But on our wedding day, my now-hubby said, "Your dress is exactly what I had imagined" and called it "perfect."  Just because you don't have the crying and hysteria doesn't mean it won't be perfect for you.  Good luck!

mrsdevilguy

I had a "this is it" moment when I got married the first time (no tears or anything but knew it was "the one"). I'm in your shoes the 2nd time around I've tried on a few the I really like but haven't had that feeling again. I'm waiting for the store to get a sample of the one other dress I wanted to try on and will go from there. Chin up you'll find it!

Lanyer

One thing I learned that might save you time is dress stores are not created equal. If you go in and don't see anything you like, leave. It is so easy to want to make your trip "worth it" but you gain nothing from trying on dress after dress that isn't your style. I went so many places without finding anything and then fell in love with multiple dresses at one store. I didn't cry but when I couldn't stop smiling I knew. You might want to check out Rosa Clara. I might be partial (I bought a Rosa Clara) but I feel a lot of the gowns have a slight vintage feel while retaining a simple elegance. Take a break if you need it but don't give up hope. Good luck!

mrsbaker2009

I didn't have a "this is it" moment, actually. I knew that my dress was the dress I wanted because I didn't want to take it off. I literally stood and twirled in my dress for 30 minutes. I didn't say "this is it" when I tried it on, and I didn't get an overwhelming feeling. I just knew it was what I wanted after being in it for a long time. It was everything that I wanted. I don't think every bride gets that feeling. Some do, some don't. I found my dress on my 2nd trip for trying on wedding dresses. I think it's different for everyone. I would just go to a lot of different stores, and be willing to try on things that think might not look good. I tried on some dresses that I thought wouldn't look good on me, but when I tried them on...they actually ended up looking really good. Anyway, I hope this helps!

kaynix21

I would say:   KEEP LOOKING!I want through the same thing. I went to about eight stores, and tried on at least 50 dresses, and I had the same feeling.I finally went to yet another store, the second of the day, and the third dress I tried on was it, and I just knew that that would be it.So keep looking. You want to love your dress.Just try and know what you're looking for. If you know you want an A line that's strapless, keep trying those on, even if they're similar to another you've tried on, each dress is different.If something catches your eye that's not strapless and A line, try it anyways...But with me, I had an idea in my head of what I wanted and tried on mostly those types of dresses, and tried a few other kinds on too, but eventually I got exactly what I wanted.If you have one near you, try a Bridal Mart of America. That's where I eventually found mine, and they carry all brands, David's Bridal, Alfred Angelo, etc., and they might even be cheaper there.... Happy hunting! Don't give up!

WoodsSeltzer09

I actually didn’t have the “this is it” moment until last night (my first fitting). I bought my dress totally based on my mom and sisters reaction to the dress. I liked it but I wasn’t overwhelmed by the whole this is my wedding dress moment. But then last night was it was getting fitted to me and became truly mine it all hit me. If you are really this overwhelmed you might want to take a couple weeks to wait then go back to dress hunting or make sure you have people with you who’s opinion you trust just as much as your own. GL

broncoschick80

I was between two dresses as well, and I didn't get the 'This is the one!' moment until I picked one. I keep looking at dresses (terrible idea, I know!) but I still haven't found one that I love more! As time passes I think you'll feel more solid in your decision, just picture yourself walking down that aisle!!! http://shcdenverwedding.weebly.com   [url=http://www.theknot.com/?utm_source=ticker&utm_medium=UBB&utm_campaign=tickers][img]http://global.theknot.com/tools/tickers/tt413db.aspx[/img][/url]