Mother/Dress problems advice welcomed!

ausmit

I was engaged once before about four years ago.  That engagement broke off about six weeks prior to the wedding, so I had everything including my dress.  I am now getting married in May and my mom is making a huge deal about wearing the same dress.  I still like my old dress and think its pretty but do not feel the same in it.  I almost just want to wear the old dress just to not argue with my mom, I am not expecting my mom to buy me a new dress and would reimburse her for the old one, but I dont know what to do I tried sitting down and talking to her about how I feel but there is no budging. PLEASE HELP!!!!

ashleyhupke

I kinda had the same issue
i was engaged 3 years ago had ordered the dress but thankfully they had not made it and got the money back... I would not argue with her let her buy you a new dress and when you give your parents their wedding gift pay her back for the old dress !

psichick

i think her mother wants her to wear the old dress, not get a new one.


if you don't feel the same in the old dress then just sell it and use the money towards a new one. your mother doesn't have to pay for your dress so if you want to get a new one, just go get it.

squirrly

If you don't want to wear the old dress, buy a new one.  Buy it yourself, and if you feel better about it, give your mother a check for the old dress.  Sell it if you want.  When she starts a conversation about it, say something like, "Mom, I appreciate your concern for our budget and I have taken your concerns into consideration.  After careful thought, I would feel uncomfortable wearing that wedding dress to marry FI.  I have discussed this with him as well, and he is in agreement with me.  I have chosen to purchase a new dress."  Then change the subject.  If she brings it up again, continue to change the subject.  If she will not stop, leave.  Eventually she'll get the picture - you just can't make it happen immediately.  Be polite, be firm, change the subject.

You might try taking her shopping for the new dress - perhaps seeing you in something that much more beautiful will help her.  If not - just give it time.