Wasn't this supposed to be hard?

littlemisssara

I must say - I am rather addicted to Say Yes to the Dress...and pretty much any other show related to weddings or cakes (minus Four Weddings...) and have been since before I was engaged.

So when I got engaged, I was totally expecting everything a bout plannig to be difficult - not to mention my truly wonderful friends in their humor have only relayed horror stories to me.

And so now here I am - thinking something is wrong because it's so easy. I tried on one dress a friend of a friend had bought altered (to my size) and didn't get married and it was perfect and everything I wanted, when I had already compromised on the dress I was going to get due to budget limitations, and everything else has been that easy. One stop for veil, skirt, and shoes, and everything else attire related has been given or lent to me. I just got an email from Zazzle, where we ordered our invites, informing us of a refund because the invites were delayed a few days and they will be arriving Monday. Photography, flowers, catering is all discounted. Cake is being donated. Honeymoon was discounted and upgraded.... really...is this happening?

I don't in anyway intend this to be bragging, I'm just in awe of how much God is blessing us and how insanely easy this whole process has been and I don't feel like I have anyone who would really get how shocking this is apart from my fiance to express this to. There was NO part about me that was looking forward to going dress shopping - No part at all. It just seemed so cumbersome.

What were your expectations on wedding planning? Has it been easier or harder? And how have you handled it?

BostonGayGal

So you think God is giving you discounts?

The rational parallel to your statement is that God isn't blessing the girls who can't choose a dress.  That just sounds silly.

I am glad you are having a good go of it!  But though I believe in blessings, I think you are talking about luck.  Wedding planning is usually about as smooth or challenging as the planner (usually the bride) makes it.  We had an easy time, but I think that is because we focused on what we wanted and were able to pay for it ourselves.  We didn't have the time or the inclination to coordinate every shade of green.

KA2

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_attire-accessories_wasnt-this-supposed-hard?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:15Discussion:8efe2f9a-51f4-40ca-8bd8-9fcb54f51f84Post:ca0987cc-cf30-43e1-a128-39311e1c3b6f">Re: Wasn't this supposed to be hard?</a>:
[QUOTE]<strong>So you think God is giving you discounts? The rational parallel to your statement is that God isn't blessing the girls who can't choose a dress.  That just sounds silly.</strong> I am glad you are having a good go of it!  But though I believe in blessings, I think you are talking about luck.  Wedding planning is usually about as smooth or challenging as the planner (usually the bride) makes it.  We had an easy time, but I think that is because we focused on what we wanted and were able to pay for it ourselves.  We didn't have the time or the inclination to coordinate every shade of green.
Posted by BostonGayGal[/QUOTE]

<div><span style="font-family:Arial;font-size:12px;" class="Apple-style-span"><div style="border-style:initial;border-color:initial;outline-width:0px;outline-style:initial;outline-color:initial;font-size:12px;vertical-align:baseline;background-image:initial;background-attachment:initial;background-origin:initial;background-clip:initial;background-color:transparent;border-width:0px;padding:0px;margin:0px;">God has placed people in her life who have been a blessing to her. No the rationale is not God isn't blessing girls who can't pick a dress. </div><div style="border-style:initial;border-color:initial;outline-width:0px;outline-style:initial;outline-color:initial;font-size:12px;vertical-align:baseline;background-image:initial;background-attachment:initial;background-origin:initial;background-clip:initial;background-color:transparent;border-width:0px;padding:0px;margin:0px;">
</div><div style="border-style:initial;border-color:initial;outline-width:0px;outline-style:initial;outline-color:initial;font-size:12px;vertical-align:baseline;background-image:initial;background-attachment:initial;background-origin:initial;background-clip:initial;background-color:transparent;border-width:0px;padding:0px;margin:0px;">Not everyone has the same relationship with God as the PP. God blesses people in unexplainable ways.</div><div style="border-style:initial;border-color:initial;outline-width:0px;outline-style:initial;outline-color:initial;font-size:12px;vertical-align:baseline;background-image:initial;background-attachment:initial;background-origin:initial;background-clip:initial;background-color:transparent;border-width:0px;padding:0px;margin:0px;">
</div><div style="border-style:initial;border-color:initial;outline-width:0px;outline-style:initial;outline-color:initial;font-size:12px;vertical-align:baseline;background-image:initial;background-attachment:initial;background-origin:initial;background-clip:initial;background-color:transparent;border-width:0px;padding:0px;margin:0px;">For example, at the chemical consulting company where I work it is a company policy written in black and white not to give tuition reimbursements for non-science based degrees. Yet an exception was made in my case to pay half my tuition to a top MBA program with no strings attached, simply because the company president felt compelled to do something for me. Several  people, even those higher than me in the company have requested MBA tuition reimbursement, I am the only one to have received it. I had also only been at this job less than a year when I received this blessing. That wasn't luck it was a blessing. </div><div style="border-style:initial;border-color:initial;outline-width:0px;outline-style:initial;outline-color:initial;font-size:12px;vertical-align:baseline;background-image:initial;background-attachment:initial;background-origin:initial;background-clip:initial;background-color:transparent;border-width:0px;padding:0px;margin:0px;">
</div><div style="border-style:initial;border-color:initial;outline-width:0px;outline-style:initial;outline-color:initial;font-size:12px;vertical-align:baseline;background-image:initial;background-attachment:initial;background-origin:initial;background-clip:initial;background-color:transparent;border-width:0px;padding:0px;margin:0px;">Like the previous poster said, she expected the process to be difficult but God has chosen to show her that He is more than able to meet all her needs. </div><div style="border-style:initial;border-color:initial;outline-width:0px;outline-style:initial;outline-color:initial;font-size:12px;vertical-align:baseline;background-image:initial;background-attachment:initial;background-origin:initial;background-clip:initial;background-color:transparent;border-width:0px;padding:0px;margin:0px;">
</div><div style="border-style:initial;border-color:initial;outline-width:0px;outline-style:initial;outline-color:initial;font-size:12px;vertical-align:baseline;background-image:initial;background-attachment:initial;background-origin:initial;background-clip:initial;background-color:transparent;border-width:0px;padding:0px;margin:0px;">Bottom line, for Christians, God often places people in your life who will bless you in ways that non-Christians cannot comprehend.  </div></span></div>

opalsky007

Steering us back on topic....

I agree with PP that the planning process can be as hard or as difficult as you make it. For some brides, everything just falls into place. For others, it doesn't. You can't control certain factors, but what you can control is how demanding you choose to be. Most important to me was being a kick-ass hostess for my guests. Everything after that was secondary. Choosing a dress was stressful for me, but as much of a perfectionist as I am, I realized that I had to let a lot of the little details go, or they'd make me crazy.

GeeGirl619

I think the reason people tell funny horror stories is because they are more memorable & interesting than "smooth sailing" stories.

I've had a very smooth & easy engagement. I'm getting married in less than a month and I haven't been stressed or panicked in the planning process at all. Everything has come together with relative ease. I followed the checklists & "to do" lists & got organized at the beginning and it has helped immensely.

Sometimes I feel a little guilty when the girls on my board are freaking out, but I have absolutely enjoyed every small detail in the planning process. I'm excited about getting married and am so happy that you feel the same way.

All brides are different. Feel free to enjoy yourself!

fairy_diva

Planning for me has been pretty easy too.  I've always been a person who can see something in her head and bring it to life. 
My family & friends have been supportive and awesome to us.

Dress shopping: I went once on my own, once with my SIL nd the last trip with my SIL, BFF & other 2 BM.  We all went to order dresses and I had "the dress" in mind to get.  For some reason I decided to try on a couple other dresses and really found my dress. I actually cried when I tried on my dress, it was weird to feel what you hear about.  So my dress and theirs got ordered that day.  My dress was about $20 over what I had budgeted but BFF gave me a wedding gift that day and wrote a $300 check, along with SIL who had wrote a $100.  They both had tears in their eyes and told me to get it, I had too.

Venue: I knew what we could afford, so I planned around what that venue had open.

Cake, Photography, DJ & sound system:  i got lucky here.

My aunt is a baker, so my cake is her wedding gift to us & free.   4 tiers designed by me.
 
My first cousins wife is a photographer.  She gave us her all day all inclusive package with reproducible right, 8x10 canvas print, 8x8 photobook, & bridal portraits for $530.

DJ & Sound system:  my brother has been in a local band for 15 years, they own all their own sound equipment.  A mutual friend in the band is DJing (sets up laptop and lets it run) for free.  This is for both reception & ceremony.  The only time he has to be at the laptop is for the first dance & father daughter dance to play those songs.

Reception food: has been paid for by my brother & SIL.  He came to me one day out of the blue when FI & I started talking marriage before the actual engagement with his offer.  He stated I had done so much for them, including SIL wedding shower, baby shower and the entire wedding reception was set up and handled by me, that they wanted to help.  He stated that he was paying for the reception food.  We have worked out our menu and his best friend will be getting food at cost through his store and he has catered for years, so they are using his equipment & people.

I've cruised these boards for deals, steals and DYI.  I am so thankful for finding and using eBay & Hobby Lobby, Linen Tablecloth & Forever Flowers by Irene.

BostonGayGal

I was being silly and didn't intend to offend anyone.  My apologies.  

I do believe that in seeking peace we see the many many blessings of God.  I was trying to be lighthearted.  

littlemisssara

Thank you KA2! I am very grateful for your response!

and thenk you for the apology Boston



Have a great day ladies

fatchunk

KA2-well said! and i love you for it!

littlemisssara- i have the same thing happening. its been SO easy. i cant believe it can be so hard for other people. the Lord has blessed us incredibly throughout our relationship and wedding planning. its important to be grateful and just let the easy planning roll! and dont apologize for "bragging", you gave God the glory

im happy to hear of your blessings

[Deleted User]

God isn't real. HTH.

t.kaufman

Boston - don't apologize for being smart and logical.