Not feeling right about the dress I bought

adrrine

Hey all,

I really got myself in a bind now. I'm trying to navigate this whole wedding thing with very little help, since my family lives across the ocean, my finace's family lives 9 hours away by car and I don't have many local female friends...

I went to a few bridal stores to see what sort of styles I liked and didn't really find anything that seemed like "the one" so I looked into getting one custom made, made a sketch and all that... but the price was just so over the top that I was heartbroken. I think I sort of went into "rebound" mode then because this Sunday I went to a David's Bridal and tried on a few things and eventually bought their style 9V9010 dress... it had nice features and all (split skirt, beaded bodice, little cap sleeves that can be worn off the shoulder, very bride-y look, nice train... and it was very cheap at $400), and I know it won't look like it did in the store by the time I'll be done with the alterations (I'm cannibalizing two sashes to add color to the dress and hopefully I can lower the neckline and tighten the bodice to better fit my waist, which is my best feature), but I keep looking at my photo of me in the dress in the store and thinking it looks awful and doesn't flatter me at all...

I just keep thinking that I made a mistake and I don't know if that's really true or what to do about it. I can't pay for the custom-made stuff (over $3k!), especially not after purchasing this dress, and I can't return it or anything... and I just don't know if I should just "suck it up" or try to find something else or what.

This is my first (and hopefully) only wedding and it's very hard to do so far away from family and friends and I just feel very lost... any advice would be greatly appreciated.

MrsHoward2Be

Try to sell your dress on one of the pre owned sites.

msuprincess04

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_attire-accessories_not-feeling-right-about-the-dress-i-bought?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:15Discussion:a1b2f17f-d61e-4119-a976-d4ca65276dc9Post:db444b80-112c-4c6b-a7b8-c194320c24c1">Re: Not feeling right about the dress I bought</a>:
[QUOTE]Try to sell your dress on one of the pre owned sites.
Posted by MrsHoward2Be[/QUOTE]

You can try, but realize that you will only get maybe half of what you spent. If you can't afford to lose that, then you might be out of luck. Did you try on other dresses like your dream dress? Have you seen any used ones that are similar?

Jojo714

Hi there. Just by the way your describing the situation, I can tell that you aren't happy about your dress. I personally know what that feels like, the first time I started to plan my wedding- I ran out dress shopping (both of my  FI's parents passed away shortly after so the wedding never happened). I am still stuck with this dress and I honestly knew I made a pressured mistake. I still have it in the garment bag a few years later. I felt like I got it just to get something. I was so much wiser this time around- I was looking for the dress, and found my dress in Nov. '11- I cried, the sales lady cried, and my best friend cried. I waited to order the dress for 4 months, and I had my first fitting on Friday. I've seen my dress 3 times- and I can't wait to wear it. It's nothing close to what I had envisioned, but once it caught my eye- I knew.

Long story (sorry- LOL)... My advice is- if you can afford to start all over- DO IT. If not, try to find someone that alters in your area that will do them for less money. Ask around, search the web and keep your eyes open. Good luck!

Maggie0829

I think you should hold off on doing anything until your dress comes in.  Then try it on again.  A lot of time the sample in the store is so stretched out and a bit dirty that it is hard to tell what it will really look like on you when the dress is brand new.

I would then take it to a seamstress (please do not use DB because they suck) and have her start pinning away to make the adjustments that you might desire.  Then see what the dress looks like on you.

I also think that by just adjusting the top into a sweetheart neckline would do wonders to how you feel in the dress because a sweetheart neckline is super flattering on almost anyone.

If after all the above you still do not love the dress, try and sell it and start over.  You still have plenty of time so no need to freak out yet.

walgrrl

Oh my gosh, a few days ago, this was me!  I was in the exact same situation, only the thing that triggered the feeling of regret for me was seeing a dress I liked much better in the store window on the way out after purchasing my dress.  Long story short, I called the shop and explained how I felt, and they said I can try on the other dress, and if I like it better, I can put my deposit toward that one instead.

My advice to you is to go into the store and try the sample on again.  See if you get that feeling of loving it or if you really do hate it.  If you truly don't like the dress, explain the whole situation to the people at the store.  See if they will work with you like mine did.  You only get one wedding day and you want to be happy and feel beautiful in whatever you're wearing.

If they let you, keep trying on other dresses and see if you can have the money you put down transferred over to a different dress.  If they don't let you do that, you can always have alterations done on the dress you bought to make it look different.  Good luck and let us know what happens!  I really hope you end up with a dress you love.

ZeroOrchestra

I bought a dress at DB for around the same price. A few months passed and they allowed me to exchange it. Granted, I spent more money on the second dress, about 500 difference, but it can be done. Just go and be honest with the salesperson or manager and see if they can help. In my case, I tried on a ton until I found the one, and then explained that I needed to exchange. Good luck to you.

adrrine

I had a long distance call with my mom, who is the one footing the bill for the dress, and she suggested that I look for other dresses as a "Plan B" and for now wait for the one I ordered to arrive and see if the alterations will make it better.

So, I guess I'm going to go to a few other places and see what I can find, in case the dress is a disaster. The thing is that, originally, I really wanted an Alfred Angelo dress, but the only store in my area that carries their stuff only has a few sample dresses and I heard that going to an actual Alfred Angelo store (over an hour's drive for me) is a horrible experience.

Are there any other designers that do split-skirt A-line dresses and/or dresses with color built in? The Alfred Angelo styles I had wanted to try on were 2023W and 1193 but I absolutely have to be able to try those on (my size is 18W). Are there any other styles that are similar?