will dad's tux override hubby's suit?

Chelsea Michelle Johnson

Husband will wear a grey suit. Is it inappropriate for dad to wear a tux? do the men in the family try to color coordinate like the mothers/grandmothers?

mbcdefg

I wouldn't refuse to let your dad wear a tux if he really wants one (because it won't hurt anyone) ... but you and your FI should be the best-dressed people there. So it really wouldn't be appropriate for your FI to be in a grey suit and your dad to be in a tux. I would talk to your dad about this, but don't forbid him to wear a tux if he has his heart set on it.

If someone's not in the wedding party, then they are not obligated to color-coordinate to the wedding color scheme or other family members. They get to dress themselves. Only offer input if you are asked for it, otherwise keep your mouth shut.

spinner84

I agree that you should make sure that your dad knows your fiance is wearing a suit, not a tux, and it would be nicer if he wore a suit...

Sunny0710

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_attire-accessories_will-dads-tux-override-hubbys-suit?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:15Discussion:be5dfcba-3c57-40c5-9f56-f8771d666707Post:fb045472-9f66-464d-a9db-cbc1bce7406e">Re: will dad's tux override hubby's suit?</a>:
[QUOTE]I wouldn't refuse to let your dad wear a tux if he really wants one (because it won't hurt anyone) ... but you and your FI should be the best-dressed people there. So it really wouldn't be appropriate for your FI to be in a grey suit and your dad to be in a tux. I would talk to your dad about this, but don't forbid him to wear a tux if he has his heart set on it. If someone's not in the wedding party, then they are not obligated to color-coordinate to the wedding color scheme or other family members. <strong>They get to dress themselves. Only offer input if you are asked for it, otherwise keep your mouth shut.</strong>
Posted by mbcdefg[/QUOTE]

Mbcdefg, is there really a need to be so nasty? Your responses always assume the worst of posters.

The OP did not say that SHE was trying to coordinate people, she said that often mothers and grandmothers TRY to coordinate (ie, wearing colours that will not clash in the photos), which is true. My Mom and FMIL were in touch with each other to talk about their outfits, and I had nothing to do with it.

Try to remember that advice can be dispensed without being rude. I've honestly gotten to the point that when I lurk I often skip right over your posts because no matter what the original question was, you find ways to assume the worst of the OP. Try to remember that this is a wedding website, and as brides we should be helping each other in a constructive manner.

OP- I think that you should see if your FI would be interested in wearing a tux. Mention to him that your Dad would like to wear one, and let him know that if your father is, he should too to keep the formality consistent. There are a range of tux styles available, and you could even print off some more "suit like" styles that your FI might like (ie, straight tie vs. bow tie, etc.) See what FI says and go from there!

opalsky007

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_attire-accessories_will-dads-tux-override-hubbys-suit?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:15Discussion:be5dfcba-3c57-40c5-9f56-f8771d666707Post:2ba24d00-81a6-4456-90e0-816c5667cb84">Re: will dad's tux override hubby's suit?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: will dad's tux override hubby's suit? : Mbcdefg, is there really a need to be so nasty? Your responses always assume the worst of posters. The OP did not say that SHE was trying to coordinate people, she said that often mothers and grandmothers TRY to coordinate (ie, wearing colours that will not clash in the photos), which is true. My Mom and FMIL were in touch with each other to talk about their outfits, and I had nothing to do with it. Try to remember that advice can be dispensed without being rude. I've honestly gotten to the point that when I lurk I often skip right over your posts because no matter what the original question was, you find ways to assume the worst of the OP. Try to remember that this is a wedding website, and as brides we should be helping each other in a constructive manner. OP- I think that you should see if your FI would be interested in wearing a tux. Mention to him that your Dad would like to wear one, and let him know that if your father is, he should too to keep the formality consistent. There are a range of tux styles available, and you could even print off some more "suit like" styles that your FI might like (ie, straight tie vs. bow tie, etc.) See what FI says and go from there!
Posted by Sunny0710[/QUOTE]

I didn't see her response as harsh, nor have I in the past. But maybe that's just further proof of the fact that typewritten words can be interpreted very differently than we think they'd be if we said them out loud.

I don't see a problem with your dad and your FI wearing different styles of attire, so just let them wear what they're comfortable with. I don't see how your proud papa wearing a tux will overshadow your groom, and even in photographs where they appear together, they shouldn't look strange.